Everything I’ve Done This Week To Deter Me From Success: Week Of January 26

Everything I’ve Done This Week To Deter Me From Success: Week Of January 26

“When was the last time you did something for the first time?”

That was a question someone asked me when I opened the floor to any questions during the most recent training I held. Even though it was completely off-topic, it was a great question. Frankly, it threw me off a little bit. As we grow older, we have a tendency to fall victim to habit and stop taking risks. Think back to the most recent new experience you had. How long ago was it? A week? A month? A few months?

I racked my brain looking for an answer as the tension grew between myself and the class. Sure, I had tried new bars and restaurants, but there really isn’t anything different about the experience there. That’s when it came to me.

“The last time I did something for the first time? Pickleback shot, The Aberdeen Tap, November 2016. Next question?” Nailed it.

I couldn’t help but think about that question for the rest of the day. The last time that I did something for the first time? I’m still on the lower end of my mid-twenties, so this should not have been a hard question to answer. In fact, it was bugging me so much that I decided to apply it towards work. What were some things that I could be doing at work that could make me more successful? Things that I haven’t done before. Things that might turn some heads.

This week was my first week in my mission of trying to succeed that I could officially consider remotely close to a win. I was taking the initiative at work, but almost so much that I would get in my own way. Here are some things that I did this week that I could improve upon for next week.

Took on three projects that all have similar completion dates.

This was my big initiative. I took on three separate projects, all due to be finished by mid-February. Projects that involve multiple stakeholders from the far reaches of the company. Projects that involve total build-outs of training plans. Projects that require for me to give multiple hour-long presentations. Want to know what I should be doing during those multiple hour-long presentations? The other projects. Want to know what I can’t do during those presentations?

The other projects.

Took a random Tuesday off because I have to work Sunday.

What I Thought: In theory, this makes sense. I’ll still be working 5 days a week, right? Plus, this way I can be productive around my apartment and pump out a few columns.

What I Did: Got wine drunk and watched Californication for several hours.

Fell down a rabbit hole when internet creeping my recent Bumble match.

It’s a classic tale. Her: gorgeous in her Bumble profile and claims to be a huge Blink 182 fan. Me: kind of shocked that we matched, even more that she wanted to talk to me. We’re supposed to get drinks tonight. Naturally, there’s got to be something wrong with her.

I did not merely fall down an internet black hole, I plummeted down one. Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn (on Incognito Mode, so that she can’t see it was me who viewed her profile), Twitter… all the way back to freshman year of college. It was bad, guys. What’s worse is that I wasn’t even able to find something to worry about. So now, that’s what I’m going to be worrying about.

Played “Down Under” by Men At Work out loud, on repeat, for roughly half an hour at my desk.

When you have an open workspace, you have a lot of room for self-expression. Well, on Monday, part of my self-expression was to try and get everyone pumped up for the day by playing “Down Under” by Men At Work on repeat for a while. It’s a classic tune, one of the trials and tribulations of a man traveling the world, finding himself in harrowing situations, only to be reassured and set straight by the powerful and apparently worldwide network of Aussies.

Plus don’t act like you’ve never wanted to do that before.

Disrupted a new-hire training by telling a story about how I make it look like I’m really busy at work.

It’s not that hard when you work at tech company. Just have a privacy screen on your laptop so that you can stare intently at it, and every once in a while, write things like “seamless?” on a white board.

I’m getting closer. I almost chalked this week as a win, but almost only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades. It would be nice to think that I can keep on this track for the next month, but I have a birthday coming up in two weeks so there’s no doubt in my mind that something horrible will happen to set me back. We’ll just have to see.

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Using sarcasm as a defense mechanism since 1993. At any given moment I'm either tired, drunk, or stressed out. Get at me at or whatever.

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