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At 32, I’ve been to my share of weddings, and I’ve hosted my own. It’s a stressful, fun, surreal day for everyone involved. As a bride or groom, you worry about your clothes and general appearance, not passing out or getting too shit-hammered, whether your fiancee’s sociopath sister will show up uninvited to throw acid in someone’s face, and whether everyone is enjoying the food, drinks, and music. As a guest, you worry about what to wear and your gift: do you go with the registry or a card/check, and how much to spend. That said, as a bride or groom, here’s one way to remove a source of stress from both sides with regard to your gifts:
Cash the wedding checks. Now.
It’s nearly November, and I had a check from a wedding in early August that just cleared. This is unacceptable. As someone who worked out of $15K in credit card debt in grad school and recently bought my first house, I check Mint daily. Having to mentally subtract the check I wrote for your day of #bliss almost three months ago is a daily irritant. I’m currently waiting on two wedding checks to be cashed from ceremonies in September and October, and I wholly despise it. If I were still in my twenties and living paycheck-to-paycheck, I would blame the bridge/groom if I ended up over-drawing an account and would try to cancel payment and our friendship.
Also, it’s just fucking rude. You have dozens (if not hundreds) of people trying to give you money, and your response is “Oh, sorry. I’ve just been so busy over the last entire quarter. Hehe – I keep forgetting that I have thousands of dollars that I still haven’t transferred into my account.” I get that your parents may have paid for your wedding and honeymoon and that you don’t have a crucial need for the cash, but don’t be an asshole.
Complaints aside, we, as humanity, have tools to prevent this issue: namely, Paypal and Venmo. When you’re inviting guests, put a blurb on your TheKnot.com site that your wedding will accept gifts electronically through either platform. You get your gift earlier (and can use it for your ridiculously-expensive wedding or honeymoon), and I don’t have to hate you every day that you don’t just cash the goddamned checks.
Long story short: if you’ve been back from your honeymoon for a week and still haven’t cashed your checks, there’s at least a handful of your friends who want to (Spoiler alert) go Lucille vs. Abraham and Glenn all over your ass.
Here’s a bonus tip for wedding guests: if it isn’t specifically mentioned on the couple’s website or invitation, don’t make a “generous donation in lieu of a gift,” and if you are going to be that SJW fuckface, at least include a receipt so that I don’t immediately read your card as a huge middle finger in my face after I paid for you to party, eat, and booze your face off for an entire night. Otherwise, you seem like a cheap twat who obviously thinks you’re able to just Game Genie the system.
*Checks Mint. Shudders with rage.* .
Respond
Was not aware that writing a check was still a valid form of currency
What is its exchange rate to the dollar? Asking for a friend.
Start making extra cash from home and get paid weekly… By completing freelance jobs you get online… I do this three hour every day, for five days weekly and I earn in this way an extra 4000 bucks each week. Go this website and Click to Tech tab to stat your work..
This web… http://tinyurl.com/z9eupwr
FUCK YOU!
Ever since I moved to a place where I could Venmo my rent, the number of checks that I write a year has dropped down from 12 to 0.
Not getting invited to weddings, so never having to worry about this PGP
Give cash, much more appreciated it and they can use it on the honeymoon.
At 32, I would hope you would have figured by now to avoid this mess and give cash.
I (for no reason whatsoever) worry that someone will steal the cards – no trust for Wedding Drunks.
Valid argument. Servers at my friends sweet 16 stole all the cash within the cards, so it does happen.
Valid point – this has happened to a colleague of mine. Their whole box of gift cards was stolen. But I tend to think the best of people.
What are these people doing that they don’t have to cash these checks immediately? I was doing the mobile deposit the next morning.
I am glad someone else did this too! We had 1 day between the wedding and the honeymoon and my fiance and I made a point of going to the bank. We had more checks than our mobile deposit app allows, plus cash. I felt really uncomfortable leaving my house alone for 12 days with that much cash in it so I made it a priority. On the other hand, I was a little concerned the check writers would notice it was cashed less than 24 hrs of the wedding and think we were tacky. Glad to know I am not the only one
Yeah, I deposited all the checks the next morning on the way to the airport. It’s the only way I was able to afford anything on the honeymoon.
Should make a wedding venmo instead of a hashtag.
Laughed when I saw this. Asked my friend and his wife passively if my check got lost because it wasn’t cashed from their wedding in August. Told me “oh we’re just cashing them as we need them”…..
I just gave an out-loud “Ugh!” at my cubicle. Cancel the check and friendship.
Sounds like grounds to cancel the check.
Cash is King.
C.R.E.A.M.
Agreed they should cash checks, but damn, just give cash if it’s that much of a problem.
I can deposit checks using my mobile bank app, can’t everyone do this? Deposit all those checks in a flash by doing this.
Theres a limit to how much you can do in a day. We would have had to do it over multiple days if we deposited all our checks using the app.
I waited this entire column for him to give a reason why cash wouldn’t work. Never got to it.
I had a friend who worked at a banquet hall in high school and she told me that the card box gets stolen more often than people think. I always write a check for extra security.
We had some people give cash, and it was even more annoying, because we still had to deposit it to use it for anything useful (and we didn’t want to seem like wierdos on our honeymoon paying for shots with Benjamins). Cash sucks.