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When I heard about Yellowbrick, the trauma center for millennials who can’t adjust to life in the real world, I thought I’d seen it all. Surely our generation couldn’t get a worse reputation if we tried, right? Wrong. Apparently, this trauma center isn’t enough, and millennials now need help “adulting,” so, of course, one bright mind capitalized on this and there’s now an “adulting school” you can actually enroll in.
If you find yourself in Portland, Maine, you can enroll in their newly founded Adulting School, where you can learn the things that the rest of us had to learn from living in the real world.
Don’t worry, it’s not scary – you’ll still be pampered with the upper-middle class luxuries you’re used to like craft beer and specialty desserts. While you snack on lunch prepared in a food truck, you’ll learn how to take care of yourself by showing up to appointments on time and creating – and sticking to – a budget. For $30 a class, you’ll be on your way to true adulthood in no time!
Of course, if you really want to ‘adult’ like a pro, you’ll have to purchase add-ons, like happy hour classes that teach you how to network, so if you want to spend $30 to “learn” how to talk to people at a bar, by all means, enroll away. Between informing millennials about the necessity of side hustles and teaching them how to pay their credit card bills (unfortunately, this is actually part of the course), by enrolling in Adulting School, you’ll be able to pay someone to learn things you quite honestly should be able to figure out on your own.
If you have the spare funds to spend on these classes, you’re probably doing okay, but that’s not cool enough to put on Instagram, so you should probably show up anyway – at least for the likes. .
[via New York Mag]
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Steph W.
Steph W. is a new Master's degree graduate with an intern's salary and six-figure taste. She realizes her expectations far exceed reality, so she spends her days pinning away Loubs she pretends are in her physical closet instead of her virtual one. Her hobbies include attempting to trapping her boyfriend into marriage before he finds out how insane she is and pretending that Black Box wine tastes as good as the kind she could afford when she was gainfully employed. Send her tips for getting out of student debt at recruitchairtsm@gmail.com
@therecruitchair
Anyone in Portland who wants to take some classes for content, please contact me.
This may be a lightly unpopular opinion, but I can’t be the only one who hates the word “adulating,” can I? Buying a Tide pod and broiling chicken should not be so difficult that you need a special word to describe the ordeal.
Yeah I’m with you on that. It’s funny how our generation is trying to rid the world of “labels” yet we create a label for literally everything. Since when does being a normal working adult require a special category? You’re a fucking normal adult so “adulting” should be synonymous with “living.”
“How to create and stick to a budget” lesson one: Don’t sign up for stupid fucking classes like this.
Would it let me stay in my student loan grace period? Avoiding those forever is worth anything.
Sup?
I hate my generation so goddamn much. Why did God send me back down now?
Cause you’re really not his favorite son?
Why did you skill Barre class today, Jesus?
I really hope the people running these joints are laughing at the saps they’re getting over on. And that they’re not just saps themselves that think these are great ideas.
Networking thing aint bad. Some people generally have hard time talking to others, also as stupid as i find the word “adulting” i find it hard relate to your indignation over this school when a few months ago people were bragging about being on their parents phone plans and not wanting to get their own plan or were not even paying their parents for their share of the bill. As an accountant I know for damn sure most of us need help with creating and sticking to a budget.
If it was on financial situations such as choosing what to invest your IRA in and how to fill out your taxes as an independent contractor I would’ve gladly driven up from Manchester to take a class.
Get a financial advisor and an accountant
Currently unemployed so no?
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We learned this in 7th grade. What the fuck is the matter with people?
It is unsatisfying to me that this is actually a thing.