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I’m no stranger to the NYC bar scene. In fact, as a frequent visitor of the city that never sleeps prior to permanently taking up a residence, I quickly became familiar with the late nights that wind up happening when you visit NYC. But being a visitor is worlds different than being a resident; the NYC bar scene is quite literally killing me.
When I’d come in as a visitor, my friends and I would be amped to see each other. We’d get the drinks flowing, maybe pop some amphetamines to juice up for the marathon, and then stay out until bar closing – at 4 a.m. – then come home, maybe crush some pizza, play some FIFA, and crash somewhere near 5 a.m. Then we’d get up, brunch, and do it all again the next day. Then I’d return to Boston, where bars close at a reasonable 2 a.m., but I’d probably only push the Boston bar closings once every few weeks. Mostly because my Boston pals didn’t feel the urge to stick around the bars long enough to make the last ditch attempts to scrape up the urchins clinging to the sticky floor who look for a sophomoric yuppie to come pay them some attention.
But I’m in New York now, and I’ve all of a sudden got a new playground to play in. It’s like a kid with a season pass to Disney. It’s like Vince Wilfork finally has access to a buffet every single day. It’s sensory overload. Babes everywhere. Bars open at all hours, deep into the night. More friends to encourage bad decision making. Everyone’s hot. Everyone’s drunk. It’s surreal.
In the past few years, I probably saw 4 a.m. maybe eight times? Ten tops? And I’d say 90% of those were all as a visitor to NYC (the only exception was a wedding in Vegas). But in the last two-ish months of being in NYC as a resident and I’ve probably tallied an equal number of nights that saw me finally seeing the back of my eyelids past 4 a.m. Several on back to back nights, too. And it’s a blast. But I think I’m spiraling towards death.
You know what this behavior does to your Sundays? You drag. You almost – almost – don’t want to do some brunching on Sundays. Sunday Scaries like the pros do it. Panic Rooms like you write about. It wears you down. It sets you up for a week of failure. Tough to deal close and put nose to grind all week when your previous weekend was one constant bender. It’s like I’m starting the week with the bases empty, two outs, down in the count 0-2. No way I can possibly hit any business bingo dingos when slept maybe ten hours during the weekend.
I should probably stop staying up to all hours on the weekends. I should. But I probably won’t. Because if we’re being honest, your boy can do some damage after 2 a.m. Lots of hot leads going right to the top of the funnel. And it’s not the sloppy drunks I’d normally have to try and scrape off a grimy dance floor reminiscent of the frat basements we used to frequent (which, bee tee dubs, probably set us all up to get mesothelioma, but I digress). Instead, there are some bona fide five-tool prospects still having a grand time deep into the night.
I pull numbers at 2 a.m. I have DFMOs like I’m seventeen again at 3 a.m. I get shot down trying to bring her back to my place at 3:30 a.m. I crush pizza and drunk text her at 4 a.m. Wash rinse repeat. Bingo bango bongo. That’s New York living, baby!.
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Boston Max
Spending my retirement fund at Trader Joe's and trying to remember to check my mailbox semi-regularly
@BostonMaxG
@boston_maxg
Friday hot take: New York is extremely overrated
I don’t disagree with you at all
NYC is undeniably the most important city in the country. Can you overrate that?
Important doesn’t make it fun to visit or enjoyable to live in, so yes, still overrated
Not enjoyable to live in? Living there isn’t for everyone, but there’s tons of beaches a short train ride away, some of the worlds best cuisine, some of the top nightlife, and some of the highest paying jobs on the planet. So while it isn’t for everyone, it works for a few million people.
Eh. My city, Food Town USA has better food, my beach is 45 minutes away, Scott Disick had a birthday party here last year (nightlife) and you should see some of the money these oil tycoons make down here. And we don’t have to buy our property by the square inch yet. overrated.
kool
Concrete jungle where dreams are made of, and also you can watch rats make love in the subway. What’s not to like?
Username checks out?
I’m sweating just thinking what new yorkers must spend staying out at the bars til 4 or 5 AM. You can get beers in STL for 2 dollars and it makes me happy enough to forget I’m living in a dying city.
Wait where can you get beers here for $2.
As someone who’s lived here for years, I can tell you that the 4am scene will eventually wreck you and you’ll go back to leaving bars at 2am in hopes that you can stay awake until your pizza is delivered. I still have my 4am night but they are few and far between now due to the fact that they ruin me for 3 days after.
TLDR: I’m soft
You’ve also got a girl. If I had a girl I’d be asleep by midnight every day of the week and twice on Sunday
Can’t argue with that. If you need a bigger late night crew I’ll intro you to my single friends. They’ll make you look better to girls by comparison if it’s any incentive.
Boston max idk how old you are. But if you’re on the better side of I’d say 25. Continentals in east village, $10 for 5 shots of anything you want all day every day. Pregame spot: It’s where souls go to die.
There’s also McSorley’s, which for $5, gets you two “dark” or “light” beers. The peopel there are also generally a bit older/more chill too. Many wild nights started there whenever I visited NYC, so I’ll always have fond memories of it.
Rudys. $8 pitchers of beer and a free hotdog with every drink order.
Are we doing this?
Crocodile lounge: $8 a beer, shot of whisky, personal pizza.
People.* Man, it just needs to be 5:00 already.
I feel like most bars in NYC don’t actually close at 4. Every time I’ve gone, I’ve ended up seeing sunlight when I leave the bar.
All too real – Every time I go out I swear I’ll be able to easily catch my 2:30 am bus back to Jersey and instead I end up waking up on a friend’s couch. Couldn’t imagine living there full time
When did Dave move to NYC?
It was up for like 15 seconds. Good eye
Refresh the page. Looks like Dave accidentally posted it under himself. Changed it to Boston Max
Come over to Hoboken it’s a more enjoyable drinking scene, in my opinion at least
I’ve gotta say I agree. If I’m watching a game, some of the hoboken bars are pretty awesome. It’s a short PATH ride, the people are less douchey and its less expensive.
Lived in NYC for 4 years then moved to Hoboken. Mad I didn’t do it sooner.
As someone who spends about every other week in New York, I have to say I think it’s overrated. Maybe I like my sleep, but the city wears me out.