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Dear Cable Company,
It is with a heavy heart that I write this letter. I have to get something off of my chest, I’ve actually felt this way for quite a while. I hate you. I hate everything about you. I’m sick and tired of this abusive, one-sided relationship where I just give and give and give and you just half ass it in return. I spend a small fortune on you every month for the privilege of barely more than basic cable and 30 mbps Internet. This is not fair to me and you know it.
We have discussed this before. I spoke to you time and time again and every time I said I’d leave you tried to get me to stay by offering me more things that I don’t even want for the same amount of effort and money. You know what I want out of this relationship. I want the fastest internet possible and the best content possible without emptying my bank account every month. You still haven’t changed.
I know this is the worst way to tell you, but I haven’t been faithful. When I canceled my cable and kept the Internet I didn’t give up television altogether. I instead spent my money on Netflix, Amazon Prime, and HBONow. I’m sorry. I just wasn’t satisfied with what I was getting out of our relationship, but I couldn’t get out just yet. You won’t let me.
You know I’ve been looking elsewhere. You know who I’ve been eyeing. I know this because you’ve been sending me scare letters about them. You say their television package isn’t as convenient. I don’t want convenient. I want quality and cost effectiveness. When your scare tactics didn’t work, you thought you could sway me by sending out a representative to my condominium complex to throw a pool party with mixed drinks and food. So what? Yes, I drank the margaritas and yes, I ate the burgers, but if you really wanted to keep me you’d drop my monthly rate by $50. Hell, even $40 per month less would at least make me think about it. The thing that pisses me off the most is that you know what you have to do and you don’t want to do it.
Well I’ve met a new company, new to the Internet and television provider industry, and they’re coming soon. They’re younger and know what to do to make me happy. They can offer me 33x the Internet speed for $30 less per month than your cable-only plan and if I want to add a television package I still get way much more for what I put in. Fiber optic, something you’ve never even tried to offer me. As soon as they are ready for me, I’m leaving for them and never coming back. I gave you a chance. I gave you many chances. You blew them all being too selfish to notice how things are changing. We’re breaking up. Go screw yourself.
Farewell,
A Former Customer .
Respond
@5OClockShadow_
Fuck Comcast
Sent me a new router because apparently mine (which was working fine) had a bug in it. Turns out the new one has a bug and doesn’t work at all. Now I have to go to a god damn store and get a new router, with no guarantee that the new router will work. It’s a God damn clown show.
Are you angry?
Uverse makes me rip my hair out three times a day when it inevitably goes down, and when it does, you lose TV and internet so double frustration.
Everyone needs to hop on the jailbroken firestick train
How would one do this? Asking for a friend, cable police.
Step 1) Purchase Amazon fire stick. Step 2) google search, “Downloading Kodi and or Exodus” for the fire stick. Step 3) Follow instructions on how to download, (EXTREMELY easy). Step 4) Watch any tv, movie, and or sports games (see below, I just learned this) you desire.
Usually Craigslist, just search for “jail broken fire stick” or you can find the program online to do it yourself, pretty easy if you’re slightly technically inclined
This. Then just go over a friends place and or a bar for any games you want to watch.
I want to cut the cord, but I love watching sports too much.
Kodi + Sportsdevil add on. I didn’t tell you that though.
Did not know about this one. You just saved me from having to watch games with 4 girls talking about Bumble dates.
Sling TV and ESPN3. Covers 90% of the sports I need to watch. I also share an NHL Center Ice Package with my brother.
Sup, what’s that NHL login info? I’ll trade you a MLBtv login
Nice try, but I don’t even give my passwords out to girls I’m regularly banging. However, I’m pretty sure there’s a midseason deal where you can get the subscription for half off (like $50). Also, not sure if you’re a Caps fan but if so the local games are blacked out so I use SlingTV for those.
If someone could explain to me why it it’s literally more expensive to have just internet as opposed to internet + cable, I would be grateful. Incredulous, but grateful.
And how the cheapest option is Internet + cable + landline. Who even has a landline? Why do you even offer that?
They might as well throw in a fucking pager too while they’re at it.
Nobody can. Even Comcast and AT&T said they do it just to compensate for cable cutters.
I think it’s an absolute joke that you can’t even watch network TV on like Xbox or Chromecast without having a cable subscription. They do realize all I have to do is go buy an antenna for $20 and I don’t need a shitty cable package? Nonetheless, our generation is what’s going to put cable out of business. I will never own a cable subscription until I have so much money I can’t even wipe my ass enough with it.
Antennas are where it’s at. Mine was 50 bucks and I get all the basics in HD like CBS, Fox, NBC, ABC etc. Covers 90% of my football needs and the rest I can stream online. Don’t pay for cable or even sling and it’s great.
I lucked out with my cable. I have FiOS and get 50 MPBS (which isn’t top of the line but fine for me since I live alone) and Advanced Cable (only missing premiums and ESPNNEWS mainly) and I have two DVRs for $120. It stinks that I’m still paying $120 and consider myself lucky though. Cable needs to do something or it’s going the way of the dodo
San Francisco, although we have tons of competition here (there’s a new fiber company offering 1 gigabit for $40 a month).
Oops that was intended for DrunkCartographer. Haven’t had my coffee yet.
MLB games are the only reason I have cable. I have found loopholes and other ways to watch everything else, but not in market Braves games.
Just got rid of mine Monday. Couldn’t be happier. Trying out Sling to see if it’s worth it. Only problem is the shitty internet from former shitty cable I’m stuck with.
Anybody know why CBS isn’t on SlingTV? I need my Sunday Morning, AFC football and golf coverage. It’s basically the only thing keeping me from dumping Comcast.
Just get the digital antenna, like $20 get all local channels and some, still in HD
No idea why, but I think CBS has its own subscription service for like $10 a month where you can watch unlimited videos. Not sure if it covers live sports though.
They had it do live events before (Grammies), so unless there’s a specific legal agreement, their service should be technically capable of doing it.
$6/month and includes live stream and live sports stream