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There are several problems with our iPhones that we know Apple could easily fix. They could increase the battery life so we wouldn’t have to cut our day drinking short to snag a charge. They could improve the camera in an effort to increase our likes. They could increase the memory so I could stop getting those damn alerts that my phone is full. You and I both know that it’s not actually full, Apple, so just stop it once and for all.
But they might’ve really hit the nail on the head here, you guys. There’s a rumor that would change the iPhone 7 for the better, and it’s not the stupid headphone jack that’s going to force us to all throw away the headphones we’ve already invested in – there are rumblings that the new iPhone will be waterproof.
Yes, waterproof.
Last week, Apple filed a patent with the US Patent and Trademark Office that would allow their new phones to take viable underwater photos which, in return, would mean that their phones would actually have to be fucking waterproof. The patent is called “Method for Color Balancing Underwater Photography.” I’d include the actual patent graphic in this, but it looks like a computer rendering that someone did in 1979, and it would really be of zero help to me or anyone interested in the concept of a waterproof iPhone.
Apple is trying to, “receive and edit image data of an underwater scene in a digital image in order to remove undesirable tints from objects in the scene.” I don’t know what that means because I’m not Jacque Cousteau, but what I do know is that this means we’d be able to do the following: not worry about dropping it while boating / jetskiing / paddleboarding, text in the rain, and pee your pants with your phone in your pocket because you were too drunk to remember to plug it in before bed. You know, if that’s your thing.
As someone who has fallen in the water with his phone on his person only to go three months without a phone, the idea of a waterproof version of the iPhone would mean an immediate upgrade for me on September 16 when the new phone is rumored to get revealed.
And before any Android users feel like chirping about their waterproof devices, just know that you’re still not cool and you might as well still text with T9 on a brick Nokia. Blue iMessages or nothing, losers. .
[via Elite Daily]
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Will
Will (Twitter / Instagram) is the host of The Sunday Scaries Podcast.
@willdefries
@willdefries
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Give me a screen that doesn’t shatter at the mere mention of a drop and I’d be ecstatic.
Get the glass cover for the screen! It works
I think they’re going in a different direction.
I think you should still be concerned about dropping your phone while boating
I cannot confirm or deny this….
I was thinking about upgrading my phone last week and did some digging on the 7. I read the waterproof idea fell through. I was not happy with the headphone jack, but I also read that it will come with an adapter that will allow you to use either their headphones, or your regular set that you have always used. (So I read anyways) I would simply be happy with a stronger screen that doesn’t crack and leave my fingers full of glass..but they just get too much of a thrill out of that business.
waterproof, bigger battery, no headphone jack, lightning – headphone converter, dual speakers, dual camera
5/5 would buy
if you dont have an iphone because it doesn’t have these, you’re a loser android user.
I am putting up with a 5s on its last legs just waiting on the 7
Get bent.
Apple supporters are just sheep. Nothing special about their products yet they have all of you by the balls every September. Makes no sense.
okay mr “I’m too cool for apple” guy
I have had an iPhone 4, I’ve had to use a MacBook for a job, and I was given an iPad as a Christmas gift. It’s not for lack of experience with their products.
Apple is all about being user-friendly, Android is more about being multi-functional. You buy what works best for your needs.
You seem like the type of person that would get up and try and fix whatever problem the teacher was having with the projector in high school