Wishing I lived in the ’70s so my chest hair and pattern balding would be more socially acceptable. PGP.

I’m the only person on Earth who still hasn’t seen “The Fappening.” PGP.

Scoping out apartments you can’t afford on Craigslist in cities you’ll never even visit. PGP.

Passing out after four beers during a World Cup match between two teams you couldn’t care less about. PGP.

A person’s college debt playing a significant factor in whether or not you continue seeing them. PGP.

Submitting the same rejected PGP wall post three times because you know most sales occur on the third call. PGP.

Watching “The Wolf of Wall Street” and realizing that you actually do work for a “shit kicker bucket shop.” PGP.

All work and no play makes Jack a journalist. PGP.

My downstairs neighbor moved and took the wi-fi with them. PGP.

Checking your email during vacation out of habit. PGP.