Overwhelming excitement when you see the blue cleaning product still in the toilet. PGP.

“Starting” a new business every time you get drunk. PGP.

Calling in sick and seeing your boss on the golf course. PGP.

Spending money on a Candy Crush level and still not beating it. PGP.

Confusing your friends on the phone when the conversation abruptly goes from weekend plans talk to profit/loss margins because a coworker walks by. PGP.

Praying for an office power outage. PGP.

Please go to voicemail. PGP.

Creating an even bigger mess in your cubicle and leaving your chair pushed out so people think you are coming back. PGP.

Walking very quickly through the office with a concerned look on your face so people think you’re actually busy. PGP.

Telling colleagues you have lunch plans to avoid eating with them, then getting caught eating in your car. PGP.