True, I’m based out of Boston so I always try to fly Jet Blue or Southwest. I love Chicago but the United airlines hub makes me rather walk there. United’s customer service should just have a sign that says “Go fuck yourself! But thanks for your money! “
Came in today at 9:15 (we start at 8), got coffee for 15 minutes, scrolled through Twitter and Instagram, called someone but they were out of the office, read a Twitter article while taking a poop for about a half hour, got more coffee, read an email and laughed at the awful request they asked me to do, farted in my boss’s empty office then walked back to my cube, sat staring out the window for awhile, grabbing lunch now and might come back for round two.
To avoid people who interact with me I usually block out everything they say and then respond with some dark sarcasm related to what they tell me about how people are awful piles of liquid garbage and then they look at me puzzled and then laugh and that sets them up to not talk to me again which is fucking fantastic.
Thanks man. Same here and I don’t even think I’m purposely trying to be like this either. I just see the horror shows around me from other married ppl and tell myself “Nope”.
Or you could hold out on marriage and have fun/travel then wait for all your peers to get divorced after about 10 years or so and then clean house at the classy bars that all of the divorcees will be congregating at and then settle down so you don’t have to die alone or something like that.
“Guys, look at my pictures of my awesome life on social media! Positively is key!! Life is wonderful. All smiles over here guys! Buy these shoes” ….(gunshot) – A lifestyle blogger just couldn’t fake it anymore.
Your rent is $450? Do you live in the middle of nowhere South Dakota and go to Chilis with your girl which is the only example of something cultural for 3 zip codes?
I love the office lap. One day I plan to get up and walk around but never return to my desk. Instead, I just walk out the building and keep walking off into the distant sunset then stop at 7/11 because I’ll probably be hungry as fuck from walking so far and then get an Uber back to my house since my car would still be at my job I just left.
It sucks that we live in a world where individuality is seen as a threat or not the norm. All throughout school we are taught from a young age to be this certain way or that certain way and then it carries over into our careers. We are constantly being told how to look, what to buy, how to act, what to like and dislike and it has made a lot of people fall out of touch with themselves and dislike themselves. We’ve also been conditioned to never question things. It’s like we have all been mass produced like factory components that all make up this giant thing that no one has really figured out yet but the ones who have figured it out come back to us and tell us that we can live differently, think differently and lead better lives…and throughout history those people usually get cast aside or killed.
Advertise
True, I’m based out of Boston so I always try to fly Jet Blue or Southwest. I love Chicago but the United airlines hub makes me rather walk there. United’s customer service should just have a sign that says “Go fuck yourself! But thanks for your money! “
Came in today at 9:15 (we start at 8), got coffee for 15 minutes, scrolled through Twitter and Instagram, called someone but they were out of the office, read a Twitter article while taking a poop for about a half hour, got more coffee, read an email and laughed at the awful request they asked me to do, farted in my boss’s empty office then walked back to my cube, sat staring out the window for awhile, grabbing lunch now and might come back for round two.
United Airlines is awful.
To avoid people who interact with me I usually block out everything they say and then respond with some dark sarcasm related to what they tell me about how people are awful piles of liquid garbage and then they look at me puzzled and then laugh and that sets them up to not talk to me again which is fucking fantastic.
It took you this long to lose faith in humanity?
Maybe they’ll set his bail to $1,000,000 and then inexplicably raise it by 5000% overnight then force him to return the Wu Tang album.
Thanks man. Same here and I don’t even think I’m purposely trying to be like this either. I just see the horror shows around me from other married ppl and tell myself “Nope”.
Or you could hold out on marriage and have fun/travel then wait for all your peers to get divorced after about 10 years or so and then clean house at the classy bars that all of the divorcees will be congregating at and then settle down so you don’t have to die alone or something like that.
You could just sell drugs and have work come to you and then get an early retirement out of it
#OptOutside
“Guys, look at my pictures of my awesome life on social media! Positively is key!! Life is wonderful. All smiles over here guys! Buy these shoes” ….(gunshot) – A lifestyle blogger just couldn’t fake it anymore.
Your rent is $450? Do you live in the middle of nowhere South Dakota and go to Chilis with your girl which is the only example of something cultural for 3 zip codes?
It’s already been invented…it’s called meth and it lasts for about 48 hours.
There’s always that person who is always a little too happy all the time like they just eat Prozac for lunch.
We’re so poor we can’t even afford to pay attention.
It’s like voting for Coke vs. Pepsi. Same ingredients just different corporate influences and campaign colors. Both equally bad for you.
I love the office lap. One day I plan to get up and walk around but never return to my desk. Instead, I just walk out the building and keep walking off into the distant sunset then stop at 7/11 because I’ll probably be hungry as fuck from walking so far and then get an Uber back to my house since my car would still be at my job I just left.
Wait, no cocaine at the holiday party? So that’s why Rick James and Charlie Murphy haven’t shown up all these years. Fuck.
Bill Nye was and still is the man!
Great stuff once again Caroline!
It sucks that we live in a world where individuality is seen as a threat or not the norm. All throughout school we are taught from a young age to be this certain way or that certain way and then it carries over into our careers. We are constantly being told how to look, what to buy, how to act, what to like and dislike and it has made a lot of people fall out of touch with themselves and dislike themselves. We’ve also been conditioned to never question things. It’s like we have all been mass produced like factory components that all make up this giant thing that no one has really figured out yet but the ones who have figured it out come back to us and tell us that we can live differently, think differently and lead better lives…and throughout history those people usually get cast aside or killed.