Until recently, I thought Ariana Grande was a font in Microsoft Office. PGP.

If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit. PGP.

Yesterday was my boss’s birthday and we ate at a Brazilian steakhouse on the company card. Today was my birthday and I ate a Wendy’s baconator alone in my car. PGP.

I miss being able to relate to TFM. PGP.

Submitting one resume and immediately planning a life based around that potential job. PGP.

Needing 2-3 years experience for every entry level job, which makes absolutely no sense. PGP.

Being a democrat in college and a republican after your first paycheck. PGP.

Repeatedly explaining basic Microsoft Office commands to older coworkers. PGP.