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The first decade of experience that I have with the internet was more “stranger danger” than anything else. We’ve all seen enough episodes of To Catch A Predator to know that there is some fucked up shit out there. But it’s 2016, and most of us have met a Tinder or Bumble date by now and not been murdered. Dating apps have normalized the thought of meeting people from online, especially those who have similar interests and senses of humor. As I planned to meet fellow PGPers for the first time, I wondered if we would instantly connect due to said mutual personality traits or if it would just be weird. Either way, I was down for trying.
Being a girl, Type A and a planner by nature, I used the PGP Reddit to put together a gathering. Armed with two phone numbers and iMessage, I suggested happy hour last night. One guy from our city totally ghosted us. The guy who showed up said it was probably because I was too aggressive in trying to plan things. Are guys really that scared of the world? I’m just trying to make friends, bro.
So now it was down to two of us. I picked our meeting place for the night. I was in the mood for a good cocktail, and I have a far and away favorite watering hole in that regard. He’d never been to said fancy, awesome bar, and I flat out admitted that it’s my “I’m going to show off how cool I am” place. I gave him recommendations based on the limited knowledge that I had of his alcohol preferences, and we were off.
Three drinks later, he said, “You know this is a date, right?” I countered that I’m too old to have dates that aren’t clearly defined as dates before they begin. I should have also added, “Would you have shown up 20 minutes late if this was a real date?” but I sadly wasn’t as quick on my feet as I should have been (see: multiple drinks).
I don’t know what he was expecting out of our meeting, but I have to say that I’ve never actually had a horror story of a job interview, first date or other normal social interaction. I’m not awkward and am a decently good judge of character. On the dating front, I’m a great conversationalist, a slutty drunk and have a tendency to pick up the bar tab while you’re in the bathroom. Even if I know it’s not going anywhere, I like to think it’s not a true waste of a night for any guy.
We had a great time. I held my booze better than him (he’ll disagree but he’s wrong). I wowed him with my ability to be both a relatively attractive female and a normal person (guys, your bar is so, so low). I argued with him about sports (he’s probably right that the shortstop is the best player on the field, but I’ll be damned if I’m going to give up a fight that easily). And I turned him on (his words) by knowing that Charlie Strong was headed to USF and that Willie Taggart left him a solid program where he could be successful right away.
At one point, he disappeared to go to the restroom and was gone for a solid 15-20 minutes. When he got back, he offered no explanation. Until the waitress came over and asked about the Texas whiskey the bartender had given him. Yep, I got stood up so he could drink in the back with the bartender. And I was surprisingly okay with that.
In the end, I let him walk me home, and we did some slight kissing at my front gate (side note: I have got to stop making out with people in front of my house. My neighbors are going to start slipping “You Need Jesus” fliers in my mailbox.). We will hang out again, but he’s teetering on the friend zone. The friend zoning wouldn’t be his fault at all. I’ve got a messy dating situation with a guy who just got out of a relationship. I’m also looking down the barrel of potentially switching roles at my company within the next three months, which would move me 900 miles away from where I live now.
If I need any kind of thesis other than just letting you know how my night went, it would be this. Next time you write an innocent enough “sup?” down there in the comments section, you may not be too far off from a fun night out with a new friend. And while my one example isn’t enough to guarantee you a great night, I don’t think the people here are all bad. So go ahead and give it a shot. .
Respond
….You sound like someone who thinks she’s more fun than she actually is. Confirmed by this poor sap having to sneak a drink in with the bartender
“Three drinks later, he said, “You know this is a date, right?” I countered that I’m too old to have dates that aren’t clearly defined as dates before they begin. ”
“In the end, I let him walk me home, and we did some slight kissing at my front gate”
Pick a lane!
She said she was a “slutty drunk.”
Not sure I’d try to meet up having to worry about the article you will want to submit just to roast me while you continuously pat yourself on the back.
Being the guy that “totally ghosted”, I have zero regrets about that move now.
We have his article because of you. Thank you for your efforts.
I want to hear his take on the evening.
I hope he give us his take, only fair.
It’d be different if the article explored the ideas around going from anonymous to known, if the author felt as though she lived up to her own preconceived expectations of how others view her, or what she expected out of the guy based on his PGP persona versus his true personality, but this was far from that. This was just a recap of a date(?) that the guy probably never knew was coming but will see, and that seems unfair to me.
We don’t always agree but I completely agree with this.
But I love maps, DrunkCartographer. Please keep that in mind next time we have a difference of opinion.
If you’re at the ESRI conference next summer, future ‘sup. I’ll keep it between you and me.
If I’m lucky enough to go. I usually just go to the FedUC in DC since it’s down the road from my office.
Definitely hope he writes up his side. 10/10 would read.
She really set herself up for him to put her on blast with his take.
via GIPHY
Shit, meeting other PGPers sounds cool as fuck. Stars never fucking align for me, ever. Side note: you probably do need me. Just saying. Sup?
Hey man, let’s hope over to Reddit and make a Columbus/Cincy thing happen. I need Jesus in my life
No joke, coming to Columbus for Christmas break. Let’s do it.
I’m always down to clown
I’m from PA but live close enough to Cincy/Columbus that I would make that drive
Sup?
Asked a commenter who lives five minutes away from me out for drinks, pgpm. Didn’t consider it a date but still was ghosted, PGP.
I’m there with you. Tried meeting up with someone the other day, and I mean nothing bad by her by any means, but I sat at the bar for 2 hours looking and couldn’t find her.
Sorry again, Jesus- slipped you my phone number to avoid future ghosting on my part. The guilty conscious is real.
I would never put anyone on blast like this. Not my style.
The weird thing is I honestly thought it was a fun night, and she even suggested another bar we should to to upon saying goodnight. I’m just disappointed there wasn’t an article.
Sup
If you met on the PGP reddit, I can only assume he will read this article about him entering into the friendzone
I’m a lot of terrible things but not that cruel. We had that talk this morning.
One can only assume “An Honest Timeline Of A Girl Who Totally Got Laid Last Night” is actually referencing this date night and that “slight kissing at my front gate” was a polite way of saying they both got laid
As someone who’s met up with a couple of awesome people from this site (sup guys?!) I’d suggest maybe not blowing up their spot afterwards if you really want to “make friends, bro” and have them want to hang out again
When are we getting pork roll again?
I’m bringing some to stripper brunch day
I look forward to both the pork roll and stripper brunch.
DC stripper brunch is legendary, good choices
Tell me there’s a good place to get pork roll in DC!? I’m dying over here.
Oh no sorry, I just stopped to have breakfast with Sassyred1216 on the drive home from my parents house in Boston.
Damn. But the stripper brunch is real, right?
Did a quick Google search because I’m not from the east coast and thought this was Asian, hahaha, but Boundary Stone up past Shaw.
You won’t publicly friend zone me after a date that ended with a make-out sesh?
Sup?
Anyone wants to lure an older married guy from the ‘burbs into the city of Chicago for an evening of awkward jokes and bad marital/career advice, let me know. There are like three nights I year I’m up for it. I won’t try to sleep with you, I promise.
Same as above but for Houston PGPers.
Hopping on the hangout train for my Cincinnatians. I work six or seven days a week but we can probably hang sometime in like May.
I’m down for Cincy
Houston here, I’ll try and join this sub Reddit and see what we can put together, hopefully peopl still actually live in the loop…
Down for philly
Pick a bar.
I’m always down for a Phillies game. That’s an easy drive for me.
Down.
Old city?
FYI I don’t know how to proceed from here. I’m a living Peter principle at this point
The Reddit page: https://www.reddit.com/r/PostGradProblem/
or
Twitter where all the cool kids hangout.
Yo
S^
I’m of the belief that if there is ANY chance of ANY kind of sexual activity, it’s a date, even if going into it you don’t think it’s a “date” …idk maybe I’m a looney tune
Closers close, man. And you sound like the King of them.