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Breaking news – I, queen of commitment issues/one night stands/the quick close, have been on three dates with the same guy. Even more shocking: this has occurred in the last two weeks of December, also known as the Death Zone for any potential new romantic attachments. Traditionally, any new swipes, messages, or dates during this time will fall by the wayside of holiday travel and finding that delicate balance between blackout and functional at Christmas dinner.
However, against all odds, I have managed to go out with and maintain communication with the same guy during this time frame and we have plans to hang out again this week (i.e. finish off a bottle of red wine at a tapas restaurant and head back to my place where I insist on watching a minimum of 30 minutes of Episode IV while downing 2-3 more glasses of wine before smashing it out).
Contrary to most of the suitors that I bring home and never call again, this guy is actually nice and decent. It’s a new look for me. We’ll call him Puppy Brad (he has a particularly cute puppy that I am very desirous of meeting and almost every guy I hook up with looks like his name could be Brad). So, Puppy Brad and I are discussing our New Year’s Eve plans and it turns out neither of us have any. This is due on my part to the fact that I didn’t have the PTO to attend our annual group trip to the Dominican Republic this year, so all of my friends are out of town.
While I was home for Christmas, Puppy Brad suggested to me that we could spend NYE together since we didn’t have any plans and use it as a chance to introduce our pups. I was noncommittal and I’m not sure how I feel about the situation. I’ve broken it down into pros and cons for your input (in increasing order of importance):
Pros
1. Comfort: I can cancel that $90 gold sequined floor-length Rent The Runway dress I reserved, throw the Spanx out, and spend the night breathing comfortably in socks and possibly a onesie.
2. Budget: I will save money by not renting aforementioned gown, ordering the 9.0X surge Uber I’m sure I would take, and not attending the $150/head gala I was thinking about.
3. Sex: 100% chance of getting laid.
Cons
1. Commitment level: Your girl here is a little gun shy when it comes to commitment (a shocking revelation to all, I’m sure). Holing up with wine, Netflix, and puppies seems awfully coupley to me. Especially on NYE. I’m not sure I’m comfortable with that when my primary goal right now is to rebuild my roster going into 2017.
2. Risk: I’ve only been on 3 dates with this guy. He seems nice so far, but I’m not seeing fireworks or hearing symphonies yet. I do most of the talking. Four plus hours of cuddling may reveal that he’s a terrible conversationalist or super boring or a serial killer.
3. Higher risk: He just got out of a long-term relationship about six months ago. I’m realllll worried he’s going to try and girlfriend zone me faster than I can hookup zone him. I’ve noticed that when people start dating too soon after a serious relationship, they try to pick up where that relationship left off with a new replacement.
So, what would you do? Take advantage of a comfortable, cheap, NYE date, or play it safe, throw on your dancing shoes, and chug champagne in hopes of finding another option at midnight to fill out your 2017 roster? .
Respond
Quinn Truflais
Formerly known as Queen of The Garbage People. Functional title still stands. Dog owner, whiskey drinker, Star Wars fangirl. #DoingItForTheContent QuinnTruflais@gmail.com
@QuinnTruflais
If you end up going out to that overpriced Gala, you’re just going to end up drunk texting/calling him at 2am. Considering you’re a girl and probably very illogical and make decisions simply based on emotion (and the amount of alcohol in your blood), you will maybe even text him before midnight saying you wish he was there.
If you follow this path, you will just be out of $300+, while still entering his trap of commitment.
Wine and sex (congrats), no brainer.
Despite the very subtle dig at my lady brain, I find this advice to be prophetically accurate and statistically likely… things to ponder…
There was nothing subtle about it.
As the person in the friend group who apparently has a “crippling fear of commitment”, the title of this article made me sweat.
I get this title a lot, initially I didn’t embrace but sometimes you gotta step back and do a self assessment. My friends were right and now I proudly own it.
If your last article is any indication of how good you are at picking guys, I suspect this one will work out just amazing.
I just assumed it was the same guy since they / he are both coming out of a “serious relationship.” Recently divorced active duty Army guys make the perfect boyfriends, right?
Clearly aren’t reading the articles very well then; the previous one was from years ago as an unpaid intern. That was pretty clear after a few sentences.
God forbid I scan an online blog post written by a complete stranger whose only material to date is one night stands.
Oh no certainly not, but lets not act like your scanning them when you’re not good sir/madam (probably sir). By all means scan to your heart’s content; but when you take the time to scan most (or all) or her “material” and comment on it, you’re more than likely either actually reading it, or just being a troll.
See post above; I’ll refer to you as Internet Blogging Comment Warrior #2 just to keep it easy for me.
Hey bud, we’re all friends here. It’s going to be okay.
Yea, let’s not turn this into an angry reddit thread.
A) As indicated by my username, people call me Rico not whatever it is you typed out above.
B) My reply to TRJ’s comment is in no way trolling the author, so for the second time in one comment section you’ve misused the term “troll.”
C) If you’re only here for Friends posts, why have you made it your mission to defend Queen of the Garbage People?
D) It was decided by the group last week that Friends is one of the most overrated sitcoms of all time.
*Mic drop. Don’t fuck with Rico.
Friends knows garbage in real life. Basically her whole purpose on this site is to defend her friend from the haters.
Is this ATLguy’s new username?
3 semicolons for 2 posts? You’re ambitious.
We get it, you’re friends with Queen Garbage irl. No need to take everything so personal.
But if her username is Queen of the Garbage People, what do you think that says about how your friend that you’re defending views you? Food for thought.
I want you to go to the gala for the content
Let’s make #doitforthecontent2017 a thing
Content is already life. let’s not shoehorn it into just one year Christ’s sake.
For* Christ’s sake
#editbuttonfor2017
New Year’s Eve is overrated anyway. Pretend it’s just a regular night, save some money, be comfortable and hang out with the guy. If it doesn’t go well, every day is an opportunity to build your roster.
I think “Every day is an opportunity to build your roster” is my new favorite motto. Printing out for my cube.
Ladiesssss, sup?
I’m cheap so I would go with saving money, but this definitely spells beginning stages of a relationship.
I still refuse to believe you haven’t seen Sex and the City.
Total bullbird
Haha, I admire your trolling commitment! I saw a few of the reruns on TBS back in high school in between classes, but I never saw any of the longer HBO versions. I was more of the Serena vs. Blair generation. (FTR, definitely a Blair).
I don’t think you know what “trolling” means. Last article you claimed to have never watched it ever. And I bring it up because you’re essentially copying Carrie’s schtick.
You mean the schtick that 80% of female bloggers use?
Give her a break! Women are funny.
I know you quoting South Park, but I do think women are funny. I just dislike unoriginality.
Guy comments 3 minutes after her post is made, and she’s the one following a schtick? Yours is very clear “Internet Blogging Comment Warrior”
The only thing wrong with schticks is that my girlfriend hasn’t touched mine since before Christmas.
Sup?
upvoting simply due to the speed with which you executed this.
Fast and fierce, defensive IRL friend.
Go away. You’re fucking up the comments section with your bullshit.
What’s a “internet blogging comment warrior?” is that something I can throw on my resume?
You must be new.
long time viewer, but new account holder.
Stay in and save the money and have the sex.
On a more important note, you should watch Episode V as your foreplay movie. Sexual tension between Han and Leia is lady Viagra.
“100% chance of getting laid.”
End of discussion. Have a good new years.
There are New Year’s Eve Galas you can just attend? Color me uninformed.
Yup, it’s a big thing in DC. Almost everything is ticketed to some degree on NYE.
$$$