Show Her You’re Not A Beta Male And Pick Up The Damn Phone

Stop Being A Beta Male And Pick Up The Damn Phone

Late night, you’re at the bar, and you’ve finally worked up enough courage to talk to that cute girl across the dance floor whose been giving you looks all night. You spend a few more minutes thinking of something clever or witty to open with, but end up falling back on the reliable, “Hey, I’m Brad, can I buy you a drink?” He shoots he scores! She says yes and you’re off to the races.

Dropping a couple of tried and true banter topics, she seems receptive and you two head to the dance floor where things are ratcheted up a notch. What started as some innocent glances across the bar has turned into a raunchy, full blown bar make-out session. Right when you think you might be able to really close for the night, her overbearing friend comes over saying that they’re leaving. Minor setback, but you scored the number and head home wondering what lies ahead of you two in the future. Girlfriend material? Wife material? Send her a few texts, set up, and go on a date then never speak again material? The only thing you know for sure is that you want to find out.

For a single guy on a hot streak, this could be an every weekend occurrence. For a single guy on a cold streak, this could be the turning point to getting hot again. Whenever I head home with a girl’s number (or on rare occasions, multiple girls numbers) who seem to have potential, I wake up the next morning wondering how best to set up another time to get together. Conventional wisdom would dictate that I should wait a few days, then shoot her a text to see what’s up. I won’t lie, I’ve pulled that move many times in the past, mainly for the following reason: it’s safe. It takes under a minute to send the what’s up text, and if she doesn’t respond, who cares?

The only problem with this is that it does nothing to separate you from all the other dudes this particular girl has given her number to over the course of her singledom. Anyone naïve enough to think he was the first and only dude that this girl has hooked up with at a bar needs a reality check. At any given point, there are likely multiple guys sending this girl a feeler text to see if they’ll get a bite. Do you want to be just another faceless name in her rotation of thirsty text messages? I didn’t think so. So what can you do to separate yourself? I’ll tell you what.

Give her a call.

To be fair, this may seem like a risky move, but a life lived without risk isn’t worth living at all. Can the phone call backfire? Of course, it can. It’s 2016, and phone anxiety is capable of crippling some people. Despite those risks, I still think it’s worth it. Below are two of the most common responses to phoning a girl instead of texting her like a normal guy,

“Why did he call me, that’s an insane move. Never seeing that psycho again.” – Girl to friend


“I can’t believe he called me, that’s so confident and hot. I’m seeing him Thursday, and I can’t wait. He also has a great phone presence and a terrific voice, I’ve never been more turned on or excited for a date in my life.” – What I assume girls say to their friends after a successful date has been set up over the phone.

Even though there’s the risk of her falling into the ‘A’ type response group, there’s always the chance that the girl’s friend will convince her that a guy with the confidence to call a girl up to set up a date isn’t one that she should let slip through her fingers. Plus, if she really is turned off or terrified by a simple phone call, that’s a huge red flag (at least to me) that this isn’t a girl you want to date.

Honestly, what do you have to lose on this one? Not only does this move make for a great story (“He actually called me, such a gentleman!”), when it works, you’ll have an immediate leg-up on all the other guys out there who resorted to the standard method of texting. Give it a try, and thank me on your wedding day.

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Post Grad Brad

Recent post grad whose name is Brad. That pretty much sums it up. Email me at

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