======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ==== ======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ====
I burned the midnight oil last night. It wasn’t cool and it didn’t feel rewarding. For years, some of my favorite shows and movies have depicted powerful men sitting at their desks in front of computers toiling away into the night, sipping on bourbon and having ideas that will change the way their company operates. To be frank, that just doesn’t happen when you’re one step above an entry-level employee. It’s not that I wasn’t working—trust me, I had plenty to get done. It’s just that towards the end, I found myself sitting at my desk, eating Cheez-Itz, and staring at a piece of paper that I wrote the word “STAFFING” on for about twenty minutes straight. I looked at the clock and realized that it was 1:00 a.m. That’s when I knew it was time to go.
I’m not 100% sure why I was even there so late. It’s not like any of the work I was doing couldn’t have waited until today to get done. Sure, I could make the argument that I was trying to get everything done so that I could just phone it in today. The problem is that I know it wouldn’t be true. You see, I’m a little over a month into my mission of trying to succeed rather than trying not to fail, and I would be remiss to say that it hasn’t changed me. I’m actively taking on more projects, teaching myself new skills, coming in early, and apparently, staying late. It’s turning some heads at work, which is great. I’m really happy about that, I like to think that it shows I’m growing as a person.
But how much is too much? I had imposter syndrome for a while, and frankly, I still kind of do. The difference is now that I’ve taken initiative, now that I’ve taken steps to improve myself and my reputation at work, I’m realizing the unforeseen effects of it. For example, over the last month, I’ve tried to stop saying “no” as my first response to something. My thought was, as long as I’m not saying “no” to something right off the bat, it might boost positivity and collaboration around the workplace. Instead of shutting someone down right away, I would hear them out and try to work together with them to come to the conclusion of “no.”
That was a stupid, stupid idea. I should have thought ahead of time that we say no for a reason and that reason is because we either can’t or won’t respond to their request. By saying literally anything other than no, it opens the door for someone to make a compelling case for why I should take on their troubles or projects or whatever. So now, I get overworked and still have people coming to me asking for help, thinking that I’m always open for assistance.
And so here I am. Coming in hot after a long ass day, feeling overworked and overwhelmed. This isn’t what I thought it would feel like. There are so many clichés out there about success. “The path to success is not a straight line, and it’s paved with blood, sweat, coffee, and ramen.” I don’t think that’s an actual quote from someone, but that’s what they all essentially boil down to, right? Hard work isn’t fun. You question yourself every time you do it, wondering whether or not the outcome is worth these long nights and bags of Cheez-Itz for dinner. I still don’t know if it’s worth it, but at this point, I’m too far in to give it up.
Cheers. .
Respond
Charlie
Using sarcasm as a defense mechanism since 1993. At any given moment I'm either tired, drunk, or stressed out. Get at me at charliepgp@gmail.com or whatever.
@therescharlie
@herescharlie
herescharlie
Whenever I’m at the office super late my only thought is “this sucks”.
For the first 6 years of my career I really mailed it in. Did the bare minimum and didn’t really give a shit about the outcomes. 2.5 years ago I started a new job and remember telling my (now) wife that I was actually going to try and try hard with this new gig as I never had before. I can tell you the feeling you have right now (is it worth it? this sucks) doesn’t go away. You will always question if your effort is worth it. But I can say with some degree of confidence that people do notice the hard work and there is light at the end of the tunnel be it through additional compensation or title increase. Stick it out bro. Eventually it will be worth it.
^^ This is tough medicine, but good advice. I started my career at a big fancy investment bank where staying past midnight was the norm, even expected – and it was so terrible. Like.just.so.terrible. Working 100 hour weeks never got easy or fun.
But – now that I’m out the other side – it was worth it. You’d miss a happy hour now and then and have to cancel your weekend plans occasionally but ultimately it’s for the better. Five years later it’s a distant memory, and eating Cheez-Its for dinner will be a great war story years down the road after you’ve set yourself up for success.
You always hear the higher-ups talking about how when they were in your position they would “burn the midnight oil and sleep in their office” yadda yadda yadda but they tell you that because it’s true and, sometimes, that’s what it takes. You won’t believe me but you will look back (somewhat) fondly on those war stories in the future.
I wish I had a job where I could work late if I chose since it would be closer to what I actually want to do. Now if I’m not checked out by 11am something is amiss.
Was fairly certain before clicking that this was going to be a one sentence article that just said “I need to get a new job”
It’s not. Life changed after getting out of public accounting, and nearly every way things changed was for the better. You can still succeed without working til the AM hours
I’ve done the occasional work binge to get a major project ready for release. I’ve also worked weekends on my unapproved side projects to show to management which has had some success. In general though, you’re going to be more successful as somebody who just kills it during the 9-5 than as the martyr who visibly and vocally works more hours than everybody else. At the end of the day, it’s the product, not the effort, that matters to your superiors and peers.
If you’re not compelled by work, then spend the extra effort looking for your dream job/working on side passion projects. Whatever your work is should be building towards bettering your circumstances, financially or by doing something you enjoy more.
this hit me in the feels today. Same position, entry level job past 2 years, higher ups where thinking last year of switching me to be an aid for our director of sales. In hopes that I would learn more, so I’ve been pushing it hitting numbers others have not hit in the same amount of time and nothing… i think its about time to look elsewhere.
One of the reasons why I’ve been so hesitant to go work for public accounting firm. 70 to 80 hour weeks, working 30 or 40 straight days at a time in the first quarter of the year. It just sounds like after a certain point, you don’t even have time to enjoy the money you make.
Am in the middle of one of those stretches now. I haven’t taken a day off (weekend or otherwise) since the second weekend in January. But, I just keep telling myself that two or three really shitty months a year balance out the two weeks I take off at Christmas and the month or so I work from home without anyone talking to me.
Just got home from work. I was there long enough I contemplated getting breakfast from the cafeteria before leaving