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Welcome to the PGP Mailbag, wherein I will answer questions from you, our readers. Send your questions to dillon@grandex.co.
My 30 year old coworker (I’m 24) has recently added me on Facebook, which I accepted, and followed me on Instagram. She works 2 rows down from me and things have been kinda flirty between us the whole time I’ve been here, which is just over a year now. It’s a lot of giving each other shit but always with a smile. Is there something here that she’s into me? Would this have to be a relationship or does a hookup possibility exist?
Thanks
She’s into you. I’d advise against entering into a relationship with a coworker and I don’t need to get into why that’s not a great idea. A case can be made that an inner-office relationship is acceptable if she works in a different department that limits your daily interaction with her, but even then, it’s probably a no.
A hookup is in play, though. I’d recommend some upfront communication to acknowledge the risk in going there and reach an agreement that it would have to remain a casual thing. Be careful, my friend.
Hey Dillon,
Proud member of Toucher Nation here!
Here’s my issue:
My best friend from college and I had a falling out and stopped being friends about 6 months ago. Over winter break, I found out she slept with one of my guy friends who I’ve hooked up with multiple times. Let’s be clear, she knew this would upset me. I found out from one of my other guy friends, confronted her about it, to which she gave some bullshit apology claiming she was drunk and “it didn’t mean anything.” She has done this many times to other friends so I guess I should’ve seen it coming. There were other contributing factors to me ending the friendship but this was the last straw. My question is: am I being too harsh? I do miss her sometimes and we were basically sisters, like I thought this girl would be maid of honor at my wedding. I considered reaching out to her a few months ago but then found out she slept with another guy I once slept with and had a crush on and decided against it. In an ideal world, she would reach out to me with a genuine apology but I just don’t see that happening. I’d love your opinion on this since it seems like all my girl friends think this is atrocious behavior while all my guy friends think I’m being ridiculous.
I’m going to address this with a more general, broad scope.
Some people seem to think that having history with someone, no matter how brief or casual, means that person has perpetual domain over them within their circle of friends. I don’t think I agree. Yes, if you were once in a meaningful relationship with someone, it would be fucked up if your best friend started sleeping with that person after you broke up. But is there an acceptable waiting period to make even that scenario okay? I’m not sure, but I’d listen to an argument on either side.
But if you hook up with someone a couple times or got flirty with them one summer or exchanged a few late night texts, does that person become off limits to your friends until the end of time? Explain to me why you think so.
If you miss her, reach out to her. Don’t let this be the reason the friendship dies.
Yo, Dill
So basically here’s the dealio: I’m trying to get into the golf grind for business and personal reasons but I’m seriously having trouble. I’ve taken lessons from this fucking lady who says she was “on the PGA” but it looks like the only tour she’s been on was to the buffet at the course. It doesn’t help that her English is shit. So basically my question is, how long did it take you to get good at golf and did you take lessons? If so, how long? Because I haven’t broken 95 and it’s been like 3 months.
This question absolutely infuriates me. You have no motherfucking idea how difficult this game is yet. NONE.
Who said I was good at golf? It certainly wasn’t me. I’ve been playing this God forsaken game since I was eight years old and I still sometimes don’t break 90. I still suck. I still can’t go low. I still stand over the ball with limited confidence. You’ve been playing FOR THREE MONTHS. What’s the matter with you? How are you going to bring this toxic energy to my inbox like this?
Three months. Three. Months. THREE MONTHS.
Hi Dillon,
How does one have a “where is this going?” talk without making the other person feel like they’re being put on the spot?
I’m not sure what the answer to that question is but if “where is this going?” makes that person feel like they’re being put on the spot then the answer to it is most likely “nowhere.”
Hey Dilly, I’ve got some quick Q’s for the mailbag.
1) How was your weekend? Have fun in downtown on Saturday?
2) My friend is with a shitty girl, what’s the best way to make them break up (again, for the 4th time, but this time permanently) So quick story, this chick has 2 kids and 2 different dads to them. Now being single with kids shouldn’t be too much of an issue, but she was kicked out of her place and moved in with him. This was after they broke up and got back together for the 3rd time. She dumped him on a Friday, slept with her ex, then got back with him on a Sunday. This relationship is toxic for him and it needs to end, but I don’t know how to help besides telling him that this girl is more toxic than a gallon of flint water.
3) What’s your go-to office pen? Mine is almost dead and the bar I stole it from closed.
1) It was a fine Saturday. I never made it downtown, though. I did, however, have a couple drinks with a friend in my soon-to-be neighborhood (just south of DT), which is a great area.
2) Man that’s a real shitty situation. What’s tough is there’s not much anyone can do about it. The decision has to be his and his only. You can lead a horse to water but you can’t make him drink it. I think that saying applies here, right? Lead him there. Tell him how awful she is for him. But he’s got to drink that shit on his own.
3) I work on the internet. I don’t use pens anymore.
Hey Dillon,
This is a question as much for the PGP community as it is for you. Roommate and I are planning a road trip from DC to LA via the north half of the country: Chicago, Jackson, MT. Rushmore, NW (Portland), SF, and finally to my place in LA. Do you have any suggestions for courses to play near those cities? We’ll be visiting buddies in Chicago, Jackson, and SF. A course and a city to crash in for a night in between Jackson and Chicago is where we have the most flexibility.
Thanks
I have pretty much nothing to offer here but obviously I’m including your question so the commenters can help you out. Have fun on your trip..
The more questions I receive, the better this series is going to be, so send me your Mailbag questions to dillon@grandex.co and please put “Mailbag” in the subject line.
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Dillon Cheverere
Dillon Cheverere is the Vice President of Media for Grandex, Inc. Email: dillon@grandex.co
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RogerJDorn
To the chick with the shitty friend: reach out to her but not to mend the fence. Challenge her to a duel.
Road trip guy: Do you need a map for your trip? Might be able to pull up golf course data along major roads across the country. Be warned I know nothing about golf and I’d do this after work most likely enjoying a cocktail.
“A” cocktail? Come on, we know you better than that.
We probably do as my “decent in urban areas, shit everywhere else” Tmobile service will probably crap out somewhere in between Chicago and Jackson. Think we have the golf situation covered. Thanks!
If you have AAA you can get a trip ticket. They will map out your entire trip and provide step by step directions in a booklet. If you go into one of their offices and talk to a representative they can customize it even more for you based on what you want to see and the types of road you want use.
Play Bandon after you leave Portland. It’s pricey, but absolutely the nicest public course in the country.
Pilot G2 retractable is my go to pen
My go to is usually a fine tip sharpie marker pen, but I recently found a smith&wesson pen/glass breaker in the bargain cave at cabelas. It writes great, looks professional as hell, and looks way more expensive than the $22 I spent on it.
If I’m gonna spend $22 on a pen it better come with a bottle of Jameson
I go for the ultra-fine, .38. Hoarding two boxes in my desk
Zebra F-301.
I know I might sound like a pretentious douche saying this but my favorite pen that I own I made my self. You can buy a kit for the internals but I carved the shell for the pen out of a piece of mahogany. Writes great and is incredibly comfortable.
Y’all need to get a Frixion Ball 07 by Pilot. Shit is erasable and writes damn well, a little better than the Pilot G2 Retractable IMO.
Bic Atlantis or nothing
Pentel EnerGel .07mm
The G2 is a great pen. Uniball Vision Elite is as well for a non-retractable option. Also, to the guy with the original question, don’t steal from servers/bartenders. They typically have to supply them personally because restaurant and bar managers are cheap asses. They don’t make enough to finance your pen habit and actually need them constantly.
To the girl who’s friend slept with her past hookup, to me it matters that you asked her not to and she did it anyway. Doesn’t matter what it is, but if you ask your best friend to not do something and they do it, they’re a shitty friend
Gotta lay down some ground rules before you tame some office strange
It helps
Why is this guy bitching about his golf game? He’s taking lessons from Nancy fucking Lopez. Sounds like he’s the problem.
Golf road trip guy: try to play the Indianapolis Motor Speedway course called Brickyard Crossing. It’s awesome. And only about a 2.5, 3 hr drive to Chicago from Indy.
Little out of the way for this trip but will add it to the list. Thanks!
The Fort > Speedway
Pen guy: try the Zebra F301 1.6mm bold, inexpensive and writes extremely smooth
Road trip guy here: made some minor changes to the route.
Chicago- Big Run Golf Club (Hot Deal on Golfnow so locked in for this)
Jackson Hole- Jackson Hole GTC/Teton Pines
Reno (Portland’s out)- the Ranch Course at Genoa Lakes/Resort at Squaw Valley
Any thoughts into our selections is greatly appreciated. Thanks PGPers.
If you come through Ohio, The Virtues golf club is the top public course in a great golf state. Easy access from I-70. I played there last week, phenomenal.
Don’t know if it’s open to the public but the Montreux Golf Course in the Reno area is where my dad and grandpa used to take me when I lived there. Gorgeous mountain course and it’s the host of a PGA event every year so they keep it in great condition so if you can play that it would be worth it. And if you’re looking to grab some drinks in Tahoe, hit me up. I’m in Sacramento but go to Tahoe/Reno pretty often.
For the last person, the course my friends play at a lot in Chicago is the Sydney R. Marovitz course. There’s also a few good courses out in the Chicago burbs if you’re willing to go out there.
Marovitz is great to experience but will take 4+ hours for 9 holes. Proceed with caution.