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Before my life unraveled in a series of events that landed me in my current situation, I had grand plans of relocating to somewhere desirable. I went to college in a part of the country I would consider subpar. It left a lot to be desired, but I kept reminding myself that eventually I would be moving to somewhere warm, thriving, and less shitty.
Of course, nothing ever works out exactly as you plan it. Years have passed and I am still sitting pretty in the area I’ve grumbled on about. A few months back, I was able to relocated from the drowsy suburbs to a downtown. I live in a city that by no means could be considered cool, and my bad attitude had me convinced I was going to hate it. I’m not sure if my predisposition clouded my mind too much or if I’ve just finally found more pros than cons, but I have made the 180 from hating where I live, to really liking it.
Not long after I moved in, I began venturing out to see what kind of stuff was around me. I got lots of intel from online searches and chatting with locals and found some great restaurants within walking distance from my house. There are not one but two microbreweries a few blocks down, and I have become a regular at both. On the weekends, I head down to a local farmers market for coffee and produce, and sometimes drag my boyfriend along with me to get crepes from a family owned stand on Sundays. In the non food discoveries, there’s a running/walking trail conveniently located across the street from me, and I found a local music venue and an art museum that are screaming potential to my bohemian soul.
Aside from finding new things, I’ve also met new people that have taken my experience to the next level. Even if a place sucks in a big way, having people around that you like changes the whole game. When I first moved in, any free time I had was spent watching shows or hanging out with myself. This needed to change. Without school or communal living as a crutch, you have to go out of your way to meet new people, and it was a hurdle I had to throw myself over. By getting involved in groups/activities I’ve been able to grow my social circle in a big way. My new and growing friend group has made it impossible to moan and groan about how much I dislike this area.
In just a few short months I’ve gone from planning my escape to looking at homes for sale nearby.
It’s definitely not all sunshine and smiles though. There are days when I’m scraping ice off my car at six in the morning or I wake up in the middle of the night to hear the trap house across the street blaring music and I question my sanity. But I recenter my focus onto my growing list of things I love and swallow the bitterness.
There are some really bad places out there that I could be living and on the scale of unbearableness, my city really isn’t that high. It’s not like I’m holed up in a storage container somewhere in the Arctic Circle. But even if I was living in an awful place by general standards, I now firmly believe that I could make myself like it eventually. The formula of going out of your way to find positive aspects works wonders. It’s mind over matter in real life application. Had I sat inside and wallowed like I wanted to, I never would have seen the change.
If anyone is out there slowly stewing in hate for their town, I hope I can offer you a glimmer of hope. You can hold out for the miracle of changing your mindset with just a little bit of effort. While those who are lucky enough to live in a “USA Today’s Best Places to Live” location may not have to dig as deep for the good, it doesn’t mean they are the only ones who have figured it out. I’m just as happy as some San Francisco native, and that’s all that matters..
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Kell
future soccer mom of America (AKA I drive a Volvo.) Miracle is my favorite movie and it should be yours too.
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I dunno, as a San Francisco native, I can honestly say that this city has become a shithole. Pun intended.
Liberals ruined California.
Liberals ruin EVERYTHING
Take your political bullshit and GTFO of here.
I don’t like to call them “liberals” because they stand for exactly the opposite of what classical liberals stand for. I prefer “progressives.”
But dude, SF is the greatest city in the world for people who want to make 6figures and still be hovering at the poverty line. It really gets the adrenaline pumping knowing that you still might die of starvation after you pay your rent for a place that has human shit smeared on your stoop every other week. It’s great lol
I know you’re being you and making fun of a well known stereotype, but it’s not actually true. You can make decent money and have a nice apartment and not live in poverty here, as long as you know where to live. The problem is that all the transplants want to live in the cool and trendy areas so of course they’re going to pay up the ass for them. But if you look around and are fine with quieter areas, you can easily find good places that cost a quarter to a third of your gross rent, which is basically what you’re supposed to pay.
San Francisco is great if you have two really good friends, one who does a great Popeye impression and the other is in a kick-ass band, along with three daughters and a golden retriever. Just don’t stop looking for love.
What metro do you live in?
Any midwest city, USA
I don’t know, I think Minneapolis is pretty cool.
I like Minneapolis.
The majority of the people my age in the small, relatively rich oil town I live in seem to hate its lack of things to do. I couldn’t disagree more, there’s no commute and that buys me more time of my life to do what I want. I’d rather drive five minutes to work and an hour to entertainment than an hour to work and five minutes to entertainment, because nine nights out of ten I’d rather stay in anyways.
Welcome to the club of the contented!
Having the right perspective and embracing your current situation to make the most out of what is available and in front of you is CRITICAL to your overall well being. It is real easy to bitch and complain and go ‘woe is me’ – it takes effort to find the good and be proactive.
Six months ago left a big city out of state to move back to rural Ohio where I grew up. Moving new places I was always able to find the cool stuff, but it’s harder when you already think you don’t like an area like my hometown. Been working hard to find the cool things about where I’m from now that I chose to come back. Now my new place is right down the road from a winery.
TL:DR Wine will fix it.
What part of Ohio are you in?
I live on a farm near Kent #GoBucks
I also live in a city that wouldn’t be considered “cool” and making the move from suburbs to downtown has really affected my perception. It’s cold here like half the year too (Northeast) and driving by places on your way to/from work is just not the same as when you’re walking by shops and bars on a regular basis )Just bought a down parka so maybe this walking thing will continue into the winter).
I’m from Chicago…expensive as hell but it was a cool place to grow up in.
Madison WI is calling me though.
Definitely appreciate this take as a resident of [A Medium Sized Midwest City]. As cool as it would be to live in a place like Denver, Boston, Chicago, etc., I have to step back and appreciate that I have an awesome job, friends and family, super low cost of living, and cool things to do in the are if I put in the minimum effort to find them. All about your attitude and perspective
Hey remember when you said NY sucks? Well get excited for the homeless epidemic over there that California barely makes an effort to manage
New York has a problem too, let’s not kid ourselves.