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Guy Fired For Watching 39 Hours Of Porn During Impressive Two Week Run

Guy Fired For Watching 39 Hours of Porn Over Two Weeks

Now I’m not trying to say I’m the epitome of workplace productivity, but this guy is making me look like Employee Of The Month material.

According to The Baltimore Sun:

Baltimore City officials estimate the 39 hours an employee spent watching pornography on the job during a two-week period equated to about $1,166 in salary. They fired him in January after monitoring and documenting the employee’s porn viewing.

The maintenance supervisor with the Department of Public Works — who city officials did not identify, citing personnel confidentiality — was bringing a pornography DVD to work and watching it at his computer, according to a report released last week by the Office of the Inspector General.

One could assume that he brought a DVD to presumably not have any porn sites come up on his internet history, but I also think that may be giving this perv too much credit when it comes to his overall mental acuity. After all, we’re talking about the guy who legitimately went to a pornographic video store, purchased a DVD, and brought it to his job with the aim of getting his jollies off while on his grind. That’s next-level dedication to the craft of porn viewing.

Just let that marinate for a second. This guy still owns DVDs. I don’t think I’ve bought a DVD since I snuck Road Trip into my mom’s cart at Wal-Mart in 2000.

The amount of time spent watching was recorded as 39 hours — nearly half of the employee’s time on the job. On one particular day, viewing occurred for 6 hours and 46 minutes of an eight-hour day.

Additionally, the inspector general’s report indicated the DVD was watched in “full-screen” mode, leading officials to believe “little to no work was being performed during the time that pornographic material was visible on the screen,” according to the report.

While I’m no detective, I’m pretty sure that yeah, very little to no work was being performed during viewing hours. I’m not sure what’s more aggressive: dedicating half of a two-week pay period to viewing smut or just going middle fingers in the air to the world by going full-screen with it. I limit my in-office entertainment to March Madness and The Masters, and even then I don’t go full screen for fear of someone sneaking up on me while I’m completely enthralled by a Spieth birdie putt on 16.

Maybe I’m just not next-level enough.

[via The Baltimore Sun]

Image via Shutterstock

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Will

Will deFries (Twitter / Instagram) is a Senior Writer at Grandex and the world's foremost authority on Sunday Scaries (Twitter / Instagram). Email me at will@grandex.co.

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