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Is there any worse day than the first one back in the office after a vacation? Particularly a vacation where, due to spotty internet availability, you didn’t check your work email all that often? Well, that’s the hell I am in this morning, folks. So how about we just skip the preamble and just get right to it?
Chris Boswell
I think I know football pretty well, but I can’t say that I’ve ever seen a “rabona” kick in the game. So much so that I had to google what it is. According to Wikipedia (the source of all knowledge), “the rabona is a method of kicking the football whereby the kicking leg is wrapped around the back of the standing leg—effectively with one’s legs crossed.”
Now, lord knows what convinced Steelers kicker Boswell to get all fancy with his onside kick attempt on Sunday, but that’s exactly what he did. The Ravens lead over the Steelers was cut to 21-14 after a touchdown with 48 seconds left. So obviously, the Steelers attempted an onside kick. As he approached the ball, it appeared as though Boswell was going to kick the ball toward the left sideline with his right foot, but, at the last second, he changed his mind and crossed his right leg behind his left and tried to kick the football toward the right sideline – the aforementioned “rabona.” How did it work out? Well, here you go:
Needless to say, the Ravens got the ball, took a knee, and won the game. That’s what you get for bein’ fancy. [via Business Insider]
Dani Mathers
You’ll remember that back in July, 2015 Playmate of The Year Mathers was one of the five people that had a worse weekend than you, after her body shaming of a woman at her gym when viral and the internet clapped back at her with vicious force. Well, this weekend was probably equally as bad for Mathers because her misdeed has come back to haunt her – in the form of criminal charges.
At the time, Mathers was suspended from her job at KLOS-FM and the gym, LA Fitness, banned her from all of their locations nationwide. Now, after the LAPD managed to track down the victim, the L.A. City Attorney charged Mathers with invasion of privacy. If convicted, she faces six months in jail.
Her attorney, Tom Mesereau, told TMZ, “I’m disappointed that she was charged with any type of violation. She never intentionally violated anyone’s privacy and never tried to break the law at any time.”
Um, Tom – she posted a naked picture of someone that didn’t know said picture was taken on the internet. Isn’t that like the definition of invasion of privacy? Nevermind that she’s just a total bitch. [via TMZ]
Travis Kelce
There’s nothing less sexy than a grown man throwing a temper tantrum. Like, literally, I can’t think of anything less appealing. Which is why it was so disappointing to see the normally quite attractive Kansas City Chief Travis Kelce act like 3-year-old during Sunday’s game against Jacksonville.
At the beginning of the fourth quarter, the tight end threw his towel at one of the refs, leading to an immediate ejection. Prior to the towel throwing, Kelce was pissed that the refs missed what he considered to be pass interference by the Jaguars in the endzone and was yelling at the refs. As he turned to head into the huddle, one of the refs threw a flag, leading Kelce to throw the towel.
Despite The Chiefs getting two 15-yard penalties as a result of Kelce’s shit-fit, they wound up beating the Jaguars 19-14 anyway. Hopefully Kelce pulls his head out of his ass before next week’s game against Carolina. Although, I guess he and Cam Newton could have quite the bitchfest about the officiating, couldn’t they? [via ESPN]
These Penguins
Imagine having your personal business plastered all over the internet? Particularly if there was a video of you coming home to discover your partner engaged in relations with someone else? Well that’s what happened to…these penguins?
The Nat Geo Channel tweeted a clip on Thursday involving a penguin who returns to his nest to find that his mate has taken up with another male penguin. What can only be described as a bitch-fight ensues.
Of course, the internet had all kinds of takes on the situation. No word on if the penguins have entered counseling. [via The Huffington Post]
Dexter McCluster
The best/worst football story of our three this week didn’t even happen on the football field. On Saturday, NFL.com Ian Rapoport reported that Chargers running back Dexter McCluster had been placed “on the non-football injury list, ending his season. He broke his forearm in an accident at home.”
Well, that always sounds suspicious, doesn’t it? Like, what kind of an accident at home? Well, it turns out that McCluster was felled by… luggage. According to The San Diego Union-Tribune:
The veteran running back fractured his forearm during a household accident involving the movement of luggage, sources said Saturday. He underwent an X-ray Saturday morning that confirmed the diagnosis. A source said that he’s been placed on the reserve/non-football injury list and will miss the remainder of the 2016 season.
Mind you, McCluster joined the Chargers after Danny Woodhead tore his ACL in week 2 and Branden Oliver tore his Achilles in an August game exhibition. Can someone say “running back curse”? [via The San Diego Union-Tribune] .
Respond
Jenna Crowley
Jenna used to be known as 2NOTBrokeGirls, but then one of the girls actually went broke, so she's struck out on her own. Jenna spends her free time saving the world, one sorority girl at a time (usually while wearing yoga pants), questioning why she decided to get a doctorate, documenting her love of all things cheese related, and hosting the new PGP podcast Don't Take It From Us. You can ask her anything you want about football, using your boobs to get what you want, and pizza at @JennaLCrowley on Twitter or via email at JennaLCrowley@gmail.com.
@JennaLCrowley
@donttakeitfromus
A Penguin having more love interests than you. PGP
So true, so true.
Sup?
People forget about the time Kelce got flagged then made a jerk off motion to the ref. After the game he tweeted out “My gesture on the tv wasn’t towards the ref… Von Miller had a cheap shot on my QB, so I thought he deserved a shot to the face.”
Never change, Kelce. Never change
Was at that game. Kelce still got a standing applause as he left. Gotta love Chiefs fans!
Am I the only one that loved it when Kelce threw his towel like a flag?
What about the Viking DB who got drop kicked by Golden Tate?
Was really hoping nobody saw that.
Was really hoping everyone saw that.
Travis Kelce just doing what everyone is thinking
Hazard of playing in the No Fun League.
Can you start doing your weekly football picks column again? I liked it.
Unfortunately, not enough people liked it 🙁
Good read, terrible picks.
Hey, knowing who to fade is just as helpful.
https://youtu.be/8JHECblcKko
Boswell pulled off the rabona onside kick against Houston my junior year at Rice.
You’re not going to make that kick every time, but no reason not to give it a shot.
I agree. Just pointing out that trying it wasn’t the most ridiculous thing in the world since he’s done it successfully before
Bring back the Bayou Bucket. Go Coogs.
Agree with the first part, not so much the second. Rice Fight!
Thanks to all of San Diego’s RB’s getting hurt, Melvin Gordon is carrying my fantasy team to the playoffs
I thought throwing his towel was hilarious. #MakeFootballGreatagain
Towels out for Kelce?
As a Charger fan, can attest, we are in fact cursed. Thanks Cleveland for winning the NBA title, thus leaving San Diego as the most snake bit sports city.
But hey, the Chargers have equally turned me into a far better functioning alcoholic. So there’s that?