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I’m single. You’re single. Most of the people we know are single. So nothing should that comes out of Match.com’s annual “Singles in America” study should surprise us, right? Well, I’m not sure who was among the 5,500 people that their researchers talked to, but there were definitely some shockers here.
Millennials are 22% more likely to feel that technology has made finding love more difficult.
I’m inclined to argue the opposite, but given that I have tendinitis in my thumb from all of the swiping, this may indeed be true.
66% less of millennials like oral sex when compared with other groups.
What kind of monsters are you people? Seriously? I can get a guy off and A.) not get pregnant and B.) not get my sheets dirty? Winner, winner, chicken dinner.
68% of men want to find love this year.
And yet, I have 0% chance of meeting any of them.
42% of participants say they judge people on their social media posts.
Well, given that I am 100% judging that Insta you posted during your freshman year of college with the questionable cargo shorts, yes. But you should also be judging that I scrolled back through four years of pictures to find it, so let’s call it even.
58% of people are turned off by people who openly complain on Facebook.
So… essentially no one has gotten laid since the election.
29% of singles admitted that actual phone calls are big turn-ons.
Unless you are the pizza guy telling me that you’re downstairs with my order, any and all phone calls have the exact opposite effect for me.
66% of singles don’t want you texting while on a date.
Umm, how else am I supposed to give the play-by-play to the girls’ group text?
iPhone users are 21x more likely to judge Android users negatively.
Ain’t nobody got time (or the text plan) for you and your green bubbles.
86% of women are more likely to negatively judge a man with a cracked phone screen.
You having a broken screen means you are more likely to break my heart. Or that you’re a drunk mess, and no one needs that in the bedroom.
71% of men find it mighty intriguing when a woman offers to split the bill.
Power move for the ladies: grab it and pay the whole damn thing. You are woman, hear you roar. Plus, then he definitely has to go down on you later. That’s how this works, right?
53% of millennial women have received dick pics but only 49% of them requested it.
I AM THE 4%! Can we start a rally or a protest or something?
Talking to your Uber driver about your love life makes you 3x more likely to hook up.
But… I canceled Uber in protest over some immigration thing or something because all of the people on Facebook told me too, so who am I supposed to talk to now? .
[via Match.com]
Image via YouTube
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Jenna Crowley
Jenna used to be known as 2NOTBrokeGirls, but then one of the girls actually went broke, so she's struck out on her own. Jenna spends her free time saving the world, one sorority girl at a time (usually while wearing yoga pants), questioning why she decided to get a doctorate, documenting her love of all things cheese related, and hosting the new PGP podcast Don't Take It From Us. You can ask her anything you want about football, using your boobs to get what you want, and pizza at @JennaLCrowley on Twitter or via email at JennaLCrowley@gmail.com.
@JennaLCrowley
@donttakeitfromus
Low key great comment about not getting your sheets dirty. Spitters are quitters, good for you.
I’ve never understood spitting. Like, it’s already in your mouth, how much more difficult is it to just swallow? You’ve already tasted it, commit all the way at this point.
I’ve never understood HJs. They’re messy and just overall a waste of time.
Sup?
True story, it actually gives me some major indigestion. I still swallow, but I pay the consequences.
Probably going to get down votes but go ahead and text during a date, and not take phone calls (aka big boy communication) and see if I wanna talk to you anymore. And by talk, I’m assuming texting according to your takes. Answer: No.
Texting during dates ruined my last relationship. If I see a date text before the order is taken now I will ask for the check after drinks. (Depending on the likelihood of sex at that point, of course)
i always notice (and think of it as a major positive) if a guy keeps his phone in his pocket and doesn’t check it or text during the date.
Sup?
Put your phone down and get to work. Name checks out.
Agreed.
It is a major turn off. Unless you’re a trader or something i don’t see why chronically text during a date. I’d appreciate a call cause it would separate you from the randos who do nothing but text as a way sheltering themselves from rejection.
Texting during a date is a huge turn off for me. It’s like, just wait till they go to the bathroom to check your phone. Common now.
It is a huge turn off. I am guilty of being glued to my phone when I was younger but after a few years out of college I realized how rude it really is.
sup? I appreciate you being considerate AF.
Where is the stat that says about women who put their Instagram handle names in their Bumble bios have issues with their dads?
I thought we were supposed to use Snapchat to get out our daddy issues? Dammit…
Sup?
I also enjoy clean sheets…sup?
Side bar on the oral statistic.
If their a picky eater or a picky drinker (I’m looking at you girls who don’t drink beer) at dinner, don’t expect any mouth action down south. Just a theory I’ve developed over time…
Interesting observation. *develops protocol to test this experimentally*
I recently started drinking beer and actually liking it, so does that mean my mouth action down south mentality has subconsciously changed?
Very well could have.
Nobody fudged any numbers to make something come out to 69%? Come on Match.
Man I must be a catch. I don’t like phone calls, I don’t text on a date, I have an uncracked iPhone, & I only have Instagram photos on my Facebook recently.
What a low bar.
Sup
Pretty sure that they mean 49% of the 53%
Hey Jenna, GO PATS!
Love you!!!
How big a crack on the phone screen does it have to be before it’s a concern? Because I drop mine all the time when working out, and even with an Otterbox it gets nicked up.