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When it comes to Harry Potter, I’m a witch who doesn’t mess around. I’ve gone to all of the midnight book releases, all of the movies’ opening nights, and I’ve been counting down the days until the play* not only comes to America, but I can stomach dropping a few grand to spend a weekend watching wizards dance around on stage in NYC.
Still, my love of all things HP is impressive at best and a little unsettling at its worst. I have The Deathly Hallows tattooed on my body. My wedding is basically just a tribute to the series. I truly judge people based solely on whether or not they have read the books. So, it should seem like a total given that I, naturally, follow all of the stars on social media and like to pretend that we’re friends and usually leave weird comments on their posts and whatever.
So, anyway, when Tom “Draco Malfoy” Felton posted a pic early this morning of him and his school friends (and by school friends I mean Emma Watson AKA Hermione and Matthew Lewis AKA Neville), I truly almost shat myself. I don’t mean that ironically or hyperbolically. I literally had to clench my ass cheeks, I was that fucking excited.
Something about seeing these familiar faces hanging out together just gives me a tingle in my lady parts. I mean, I spend an embarrassing amount of my free time stalking these folks’ profiles for glimpses that they still love and remember their Harry Potter days. You know, just in case they forgot that they spent all of their childhoods making 8 motion pictures.
So, seeing this was truly the kind of hope I needed on a bleak Monday morning. Why were they all together? No clue. What was going on? I haven’t the faintest idea. Where was my invite? Lost, obviously, just like my Hogwarts letter.
Still, seeing this glorious reunion picture sparks tons of questions in the fandom kingdom. When they get drunk together and toss back Veritaserum, do they just relive their Potter days, gossiping about which people went on to become stars and which ones totally fizzled out? Do they talk shit on the whole Fantastic Beasts series? Also, is it awkward that this group was a total love triangle? I mean, Matt had a crush on Emma, Emma had a crush on Tom, and Tom most likely had a crush on himself. Does this night end with someone hooking up and someone going home heartbroken? Is there a wizard’s threesome in the cards? Am I totally just reading into this and these are just old friends who got a drink together possibly for PR sake? WHO’S TO SAY?!
All that matters is this: As long as I can wake up on a Monday morning, truly wanting to die, and see something this beautiful on my timeline, I will forever have a reason to live. So, thanks, as always to Joanne Rowling, for giving us a magical escape, whether it’s by book or screen or casual Instagram post. Once again Harry Potter proves that it’s the world that will always be there to welcome us home. You know, even if we never fully got invited to Hogwarts. We’ll just chalk it up to an administrative mistake. Happens all the time..
*I’d just like to make a nerdy note here: I do not, in fact, condone “The Cursed Child.” I wish it would never have happened. But, as it is, I respect the fact that it’s J.K.’s world and we’re all just living it. Besides, I have only absorbed the story via written word as opposed to on stage where it was intended to be consumed, so alas, I can’t totally hate it yet. Even though I do.
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Rachel Varina
if it doesn't have snack or seats, i'm not there. hate mail/Sunny references can be sent to itsrachelvarina@gmail.com
@rachelvarina
@rachelvarina
Emma Watson just does it for me.
I wish I could “Nice Work” this 68 more times
Emma Watson does it for me, too. And I am straight.
Nobody’s that straight
Also a straight female and I can’t get enough of her.
Probably not so hot of a take, but Cursed Child is fanfiction trash.
Warmer take: so is the epilogue.
I wish I had Potter’s invisible cloak to use in my office for naps
So in your wildest dreams where you live in a universe that has granted you a literal magical invisibility cloak, you’d only use it for naps at your desk? That’s your fantasy?
But he hasn’t told you his salary yet
Probably like $80,000 a year
More than Todd
Even though this article needed way more Emma Watson pics, I appreciate Grandex for firing out some good Monday morning ‘tent to help us make it through.
I can’t get over the fact that Tom Felton is 30
Hi, what’s going on in here?
Hermione should’ve ended up with Draco in the books.
No.
Here we go… HP is trash and basically a J.R.R Tolkien rip off.
Therefore, HP < LoTR Star Trek though…so there’s that.
Excuse my Parseltongue but….. ssspspssspsps (FUCK YOU)
Let the hate flow through you
I’ve expressed my discontent with filthy Potter-hating muggles before. You talk trash like this again, imma fuck around and catch a body.
The only similarity between LoTR and HP is that both authors use their initials before their last names. Your opinion is trash and there’s no two ways about it.
what in the f*ck did the website do to my comment. Star Trek < HP < LoTR < Star Wars
Your comment was trash regardless of what the website did to it. You, Malfoy, and Fang are going to the Forbidden Forest.
Harry and his dumbass scar are trash.