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In life, one of the biggest power moves you can pull is telling someone “I got a guy.” An “in,” or a “hookup”. Whatever you want to call it, when you get into a situation and your personalized solution is just a phone call away, that is a great feeling. In high school and college, your Guy was probably for booze and weed or maybe to get your Adderall fix, but as we mature, so should our Guy relationships (for some of you, you probably still have a guy for weed or Adderall and I guess that’s okay, not judging, but maybe you need an attorney as your Guy too).
Your Guy probably isn’t someone you would consider a close friend. That relationship is something different. Your friend will almost always be there for you but that is expected. Having a Guy is more like gratuity — always appreciated, never expected.
Of course, the relationship with your guy (or girl, your “guy” can be a woman but, for the sake of this column, I’m just going to refer to this person as “guy”; no sexism intended) can be quite delicate. In essence, you are exploiting a personal relationship that your Guy could take better advantage of if he wasn’t dealing with you. Whether that be a set of tires below cost or spending his Saturday morning fixing some shoddy plumbing in your new house, your Guy would be making more money if he weren’t working for you. So respect that.
A few tips to keep in mind once you have established the relationship with your Guy. If he is going to be doing work in your home, make it a point to have his drink of choice in stock. Diet coke, seasonal Sam Adams, Makers Mark or whatever it is, it’s almost certainly cheaper than the $100 an hour labor rate you would be paying if he were to be doing it on the clock. A little appreciation goes a long way.
Next, be prepared to reciprocate. “But I’m just a desk jockey, and I don’t even work in IT. No individual person needs what I know how to do.” That’s just fine. Your Guy probably understands that. But there are times when he may just need someone with a pulse or a little upper body strength. Needs help getting a couch up the stairs? Move heaven and earth to help him out or do not expect him to come tow you out the next time you get stuck in a snowbank. One of the best Guy relationships I have is with a local landowner that lets me access some of his premium hunting land. People would pay many thousands of dollars for this same access. I get it for the ultra-low price of two Saturdays of my time a year. I consider it a ridiculous bargain.
Don’t overuse your Guy. You don’t want to become a burden or an annoyance. He has a life too and needs to make ends meet just the same as you.
Finally, and this is most important: do not, I repeat DO NOT, “loan” your guy out. Yes, throw any business you can at your Guy if that is appropriate for your situation, but do not tell someone else that you can get them a discount or free labor. That is exceptionally rude and probably the quickest way to turn your Guy from someone that hooks you up to someone that charges you an additional 10% and calls it the friends and family discount. Also, there is a pretty good chance you met your Guy through a friend. Abusing the relationship will definitely reflect poorly on your friend. I have taken a few friends out to my aforementioned landowner Guy’s place several times, but I always clear it with the landowner up front and let my friends know that my relationship with the landowner has been one I have worked really hard on and they need to respect that.
Don’t blow it. .
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Awesome article. Growing up, my old man had a guy for everything. He was handy himself but every little knowledge/skill gap was covered. Flooring, excavating, plumbing, cars, whatever. If only I had his networking skills…
Unfortunately, I’m “has a truck” guy among my friends. I get no fewer than 5 requests every summer to help move apartments, pick up furniture, road trip, whatever the fuck. Oh well, at least I get a six pack or something in return every once in a while.
The only point I disagree with is the “probably not a close friend”. All my “guys” are my brothers, whether through my college fraternity or through the Mason’s Lodge. My skills are healthcare, and I’m pretty handy, too. We just trade skills when stuff needs to be done. That’s friendship, hell, that’s brotherhood. And as always, when I need them, I always ask them to teach me or show me something I can do to make it easier the next time it breaks/I need their help.
Also, never underestimate the goodwill a good quality jar of moonshine can have on any relationship.
Just make sure whoever brewed that moonshine knows what they’re doing, otherwise you know, you’ll go blind.
When I go blind, it won’t be from the moonshine.
‘Atta boy
I know two good science guys…
Bill @BillNye
via GIPHY
and Neil @NeilTyson
via GIPHY
My guy is generally my father in law. Makes it a little harder to ask, but also a little harder for him to say no.
And agree, the best payment is booze/food and returned manual labor.
I am apparently the only guy my friends know with a truck so I’ve helped a lot of people move. I get a lot of free beer so I guess it could be worse.
Wrote my reply before seeing yours – didn’t mean to steal your thunder, fellow “truck guy”.
I’m not mad at you. Unless you drive a Chevy…
Exactly my thoughts. The easiest way to become the “guy” is to own a pickup. Next thing you know your network of “friends” grows by 10.
Agreed. I have a Jeep so naturally I like to act like I have a truck that can do cool things so I always will jump the gun on helping tow someone out cause “I have 4 wheel drive bruh.”
Great article man. I’m the “help everyone move” and “organize outtings”. I’ve got a lawyer, electrician and car person. I’m trading my electrician “install garbage disposal” for “help kids learn to play hockey”. Also helps they are all great friends of mine and wonderful people.