Nived_Neirbo

Optimistic pessimist, Profoundly unimportant

Member Since 01/07/2014

  • Nived_Neirbo 7 years ago on Morning Coffee Thoughts 6/13

    Just had a Nitro Brew and snuck in an Aderol that my buddy left on our coffee table from this weekend. Needless to say I won’t be sleeping but sleep is for people who gave up on their dreams. Has anyone ever stopped to think about how dumb our life set up is like for the first 18 years you are forced to learn about a ton of shit and then after the trial period ends, then the membership subscription starts and then you realize that wasted so much valuable time, energy, and money on things that didn’t even matter. I should have just became a geologist so I could chill with rocks outside all day because I basically do that inside right now expect the rocks around me sometimes have terrible opinions and medication induced feelings lol

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  • Nived_Neirbo 7 years ago on Regular Professions We Should Stop Armchair Quarterbacking

    If I was a weatherman, I’d offer up little morsels of facts after my report just to give the people a little context and also distract them from the fact that I might be wrong about the weather even though they can look outside for themselves. For example, a nice touch would be “Hey, folks it’s probably going to rain today so bring a coat with you in case the 10 seconds that you actually get to be outside today is a little wet. Also, did you know that the cost of the bombs rained down on a random village hospital could have paid off the student debt crisis here in America? Okay, we’ll have a great day and don’t forget to keep working hard. Here’s Jerry with sports!”

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  • Nived_Neirbo 7 years ago on I’m Tired Of Being Beer Shamed

    Guys, did you know that you can get out of going to work forever? Listen carefully, all you have to do is rob a bank and either way (success or failure), you won’t have to go to work anymore! This message has been brought to you by The American Workforce Management Association

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  • Nived_Neirbo 7 years ago on Morning Coffee Thoughts 6/12

    I want to publicly apologize to 8am Staff Meeting for not seeing his email until this weekend while on an impromptu camping trip. If you’re still in Boston hit me up. Again, I am sorry for being a non-present piece of trash.

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  • Nived_Neirbo 7 years ago on Morning Coffee Thoughts 6/9

    Maple Water Cold Brew, folks. The only 4 words you need to care about. I’m going to drink so much of this shit that it will cause so much deforestation and animal species extinction that it will force us to leave the planet or just die so that the earth can continue its progressive cycle without us pretentious i idiots who think we can change the course of nature. What idiots lol

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  • Nived_Neirbo 7 years ago on What I'm Wearing In Summer '17

    I’m probably going to opt out of being sucked in by clever marketing schemes to perpetuate the cycle of mass consumption and consumerism of fashion labels. I look great naked. With that being said, I’m trying to get my “dope ass” streetwear brand off the ground by using Instagram only tactics and hiring completely irrelevant influencer scum to promote it to the lemmings who think waiting in line for a white t-shirt is culture and art lol

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  • Nived_Neirbo 7 years ago on Morning Coffee Thoughts 6/8

    Guys, this is going to sound like the most pretentious/hipster thing I’ve ever said but yesterday I had the pleasure of having cold brew coffee that was brewed with maple tree water and it was the best god damn thing I’ve ever had. The coffee store at my work has stepped up to new levels, almost reaching Portlandia status. That coffee was so good that it made me want to quit my job, start a maple tree conglomerate/environmental terrorist group and invade Vermont and enslave the 7 people that live up there and have them brew this delicious coffee for the world. This is capitalism folks and if you can’t take the sticky sap, the get the fuck out of my maple forest….or some shit like that

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  • Nived_Neirbo 7 years ago on In A Bind? Beware Of Terrible Advice

    Basically, don’t listen to anyone’s advice unless they are a.) a billionaire b.) don’t have a boring/shitty life c.) have experienced a lot of shit in their lives and got through it successfully d.) have a lot of social media followers and offer out motivational quotes from unsourced sources because it obviously works. I mean, look at how well all of us as a society are doing after seeing those posts every scroll

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  • Nived_Neirbo 7 years ago on What Is The Male Equivalent Of The Instagram Model?

    If those guys want to come hang out with me as I photograph people shooting up heroin in broad daylight in some alley next to the methadone clinics with the devil in their eyes, they’re more than welcome to. “Shoot for success, catch the invisible dragon”

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  • Nived_Neirbo 7 years ago on Morning Coffee Thoughts 6/7

    It was called the Smokehouse but now it’s called Magnolia Smokehouse. I’m not 100% sure but I think they dabble in BBQ. Also, I personally think they changed the name as a marketing ploy to differentiate themselves and prevent confusion due to the fact that my favorite medical weed dispensary moved in across the street which used to be a bank. I’m no conspiracy theorist but the future is green folks and I’m not talking about the kind that you have in your wallets

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  • Nived_Neirbo 7 years ago on Morning Coffee Thoughts 6/7

    I seriously believe that nitro brew coffee could cure the heroin epidemic. It’s about time we give all those poppy farmers under our government mercenary watch in Afghanistan a break. Time to move that work load down to South America for the coffee farmers since they seem to be getting a little bit too happy and smiley, smiley because Starbucks just acknowledged them as human beings that need a fair wage lol

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  • Nived_Neirbo 7 years ago on Ketel One Creates Commercials That Make Me Want To Be A Better Man

    I like the commercial with the 3 Russian dudes who look like they could have ties to the KGB in parkas standing outside The Kremlin, passing around a 5th of premium vodka and smoking some cigs in the dead of winter as they wait for the green light to assassinate one of their own political figures…god damnit I’m getting real life and fake life mixed up again

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