======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ==== ======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ====
Remember way back in 2008 when Four Loko became a staple at any and all house parties? It was a drink unlike anything else on the market at that time and it hit college campuses across the country like a freight train. If you were a in college from 2008-2010, you most certainly remember how popular Lokos were, and with flavors like strawberry lemonade, sour apple, watermelon, and grape, it was pretty obvious that the target demographic was teens who did not yet enjoy the taste of alcohol.
They were cheap, they tasted a hell of a lot better than a shot of Burnett’s Cherry or El Toro, and you could get absolutely knackered for ten bucks (and I say ten bucks because you usually had to throw the creepy guy who was buying them for you a couple of dollars on the side). But the Four Loko craze was short lived.
Local news stations had a field day reporting on underage drinkers who would give themselves alcohol poisoning week in and week out from these babies, and then you kids started dying when they would mix Adderall or cocaine with the insane amount of caffeine that a Loko packed.
The health risks were obvious, and lawmakers pounced on the makers of Four Loko soon after investigative reports showed that the risk for blackouts, alcohol poisoning, and death were extremely high.
I vividly remember people that lived in the hallway of my dorm room stocking up on original formula Four Loko because they found out that while Four Loko would remain making their drinks, the caffeine and ABV would be considerably lower.
The Four Loko era lasted all of a few months for me, and I can’t say I was sad to see them go. But since the demise of Loko, there has been a noticeable hole where a market used to be. A fruit flavored drink that successfully masks the taste of alcohol – enter White Claw – the Four Loko for Generation Z.
White Claw is what is commonly referred to as a “hard seltzer.” As we all know seltzer is having a bit of a moment with drinks like La Croix and to a lesser extent S. Pellegrino and Perrier. For reasons I can’t understand, La Croix has become one of the most popular sparkling waters on the planet, and White Claw capitalized on this by making a pre-mixed drink made of flavored seltzer and alcohol from fermented sugar.
There was a completely untapped market of people who love seltzer water and also want to catch a tasty buzz, and White Claw just happened to make a product that people enjoy. For around eight dollars you can buy a six pack of White Claws in flavors like Black Cherry and Ruby Grapefruit (sound familar?) and get relatively wasted.
In a pinch, a White Claw is fine I guess. Every time I’m offered a White Claw I think to myself “Hm. This is okay and it’s going to help me reach my goal of getting drunk but also I think I’m going to be sick if I drink more than one or two of these?”
Perhaps it’s unfair of me to compare the White Claw trend to what Four Loko did from ‘08-’10. White Claw is significantly less trashy than Four Loko, and they obviously don’t pack the caffeine punch that Lokos used to have. But they just feel like a drink that young people (who are maybe the most health-conscious in the country right now) would gravitate to.
People aren’t getting alcohol poisoning like they were from Lokos, but there is something about the White Claw that feels like it does not have staying power. It’s a pre-mixed drink that will die sooner rather than later.
There’s no reason to be drinking a WC unless for some reason you don’t have direct access to vodka, a lime, and some original Perrier. Like why drink this pre-mixed, watered down garbage when you can make a similar drink that is a billion times fresher and probably higher in alcohol content? I’ll concede that White Claws are convenient as all hell, but you won’t convince me that this isn’t a stupid trend marketed towards underage drinkers with an affinity for fruit-flavored beverages..
Image via Youtube
Respond
jduda@grandex.co
Duda just calling the new generation soft. I’m here for it.
Back in my day, we risked arrhythmia to go hard all night! Kids today have it so cushy!
Everybody gets a trophy
It’s an easy drink for day drinking. Won’t fuck you up like any another liquor and won’t bloat you like beer. I’m not going to make a drink every time my glass empties when I can just crack open another can.
What on earth is the point of drinking all day if you’re not doing it to get fucked up?
Oh don’t get me wrong, getting fucked up is the goal, but if I was slugging back vodka, I’d get wasted waaaay too much quicker than I’d like.
Yikes. “Way too much quicker” I promise I’m not already drunk
Just drink slower. You’re here enough to know about the weak cocktail recipe. No need to get away from the classics.
^^ Facts only
I’ve been a typical light beer guy for day drinking, but this kind of efficiency might make me reconsider that stance.
I remember slugging 4 loko and laying in bed at 6am with my heart pounding out of my chest
I’m pretty sure that was the cocaine
Why not both?
White Claw is definitely the move at my place’s pool this summer, but I haven’t jumped on board yet. Not a big seltzer fan but every basic, tan blonde girl at the pool is sucking them down like they’re about to be banned
@ me next time
Sup?
I only see people aged 26+ drinking white claw because it’s viewed as “healthy” or not bad for you.
It’s trash though.
What I’ve witnessed is a substitution for beer, and its seltzer-like properties, and canned-convenience, but this same Truly (in this case) enthusiast ops for vodka soda at the bar.
It’s really not though. They have more calories than most light beers and most also have sugar in them.
A craft brewer would be wise though to offer mirco / craft versions of these, because, like you mention, these are ultimately trash (try one warm and/or after carbonation fizzles).
any beer warm or after the carbonation fizzles would also be trash as well.
Throw a warm, un-carbonated beer in the fridge that was good originally – well enough to get back on the horse in the morning.
Clear malt beverages are a whole new world of weird in the brewing world. They need extra storage and chemicals to be able to handle. You’d also lose a lot of storage space and that’s money you’re losing.
Aaaand here it is. The awful take we’ve been waiting for
Four Loko was designed to get you as annihilated as possible as fast as possible. White Claw is a refreshing alcoholic beverage being sipped on by post grads, how can you even compare the two?
Yeah, I kinda get what you were going for, but his is an apples to pomegranate comparison
Nah it’s just the new go-to for basic girls. Wish I came up with such an easy money factory
I plan on slugging Ruby Grapefruit White Claw at the beach all weekend
I got a front row seat to the havoc White Claw wreaks this weekend. Shout out to Shanté. The true MVP for not kicking us out of our Uber after my friend painted the sidewalk.
You’re missing two words. Suburban Housewife. Seriously. This is the target demographic. Yetis are full of these at baseball games, swim meets, and at play dates.