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Whether your caffeination comes from a Keurig, crappy break room coffee, or the way too expensive Starbucks drive-thru, there’s no denying that our morning coffee is a necessary part of our daily routines. From my friends to my coworkers to my classmates, I honestly couldn’t tell you the name of one peer who doesn’t rely on coffee to get through the day. I know that if, by some horrible act of God, I miss my morning coffee, I become cranky, develop a headache, and overall morph into a generally useless sad excuse for a person.
As it turns out, I’m not alone. According to data from Bloomberg, millennials are consuming coffee at an all-time record high. Whether this is because we’re exhausted from our side hustles or late night hangouts, or we just love a quality cold brew, we’re drinking more coffee than ever before. Considering we’re already facing the threat of coffee annihilation due to global warming, this rise in demand for an already-diminishing supply of coffee is extra alarming.
In addition to possibly eliminating coffee forever, which is horrifying enough, this demand increase is partially responsible for the higher prices we keep getting charged with at Starbucks or our local coffee shop of choice. As coffee gets harder for organizations to obtain, it becomes even harder on our wallets. As much as I love getting my daily skinny caramel latte, I may have to start trading it in for a home brew in a thermos if this trend continues. And unfortunately for us, it’s not slowing down anytime soon.
Bloomberg reported that of all the coffee consumed in the U.S., millennials are responsible for drinking 44 percent of it, and that number is only climbing. For younger millennials, our consumption has risen from 34 percent to 48 percent, whereas for the older counterparts of our generation, 60 percent of them now need a daily brew as opposed to a previously recorded 51 percent.
While I want to be mad at all of these coffee-drinking millennials who are sucking up the earth’s supply and making my Starbucks trips more and more expensive, I fall into that category, so I honestly can’t blame them. Start adjusting your budgets or getting used to shitty break room coffee, because while our tastes for coffee aren’t going anywhere, the money in our checking account definitely is. Sorry Starbucks, but it looks like I’ll be seeing you less these days. It’s not you, it’s all these millennial coffee drinkers. Promise. .
[via Washington Post]
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Steph W.
Steph W. is a new Master's degree graduate with an intern's salary and six-figure taste. She realizes her expectations far exceed reality, so she spends her days pinning away Loubs she pretends are in her physical closet instead of her virtual one. Her hobbies include attempting to trapping her boyfriend into marriage before he finds out how insane she is and pretending that Black Box wine tastes as good as the kind she could afford when she was gainfully employed. Send her tips for getting out of student debt at recruitchairtsm@gmail.com
@therecruitchair
But what are the 10 cities Millennials can’t stop drinking coffee?
Starbucks isn’t expensive because of a shortage of coffee. It’s expensive because they know the basics will buy it no matter how much it costs.
Ride the tea-train and avoid all these problems.
Tea is methadone for my coffee addiction.
Earl grey has helped me get back to normal more than once.
For those of you on a budget and still looking for a quality cup of joe, Chock Full O’ Nuts is the best for price and quality. They also have K-Cups which is the only reason I am remotely kind to people on any given day.
Is it true if you don’t use it, you lose it?
I quit coffee several months ago. My secret? Masterbation. Yankin the crank wakes you up and puts you in a great mood. Tired at work? Go the the bathroom and choke the chicken. Hungover after a night of boozin? Spank the ole monkey and youll feel good as new. Big deadline coming up? Rub the one eyed snake during coffee break and youll feel ready to take on the world.
All I want to do afterwards is nap
Pretty sure cranking it at work is frowned upon.
Doesn’t that lower your T which lowers your energy?
The closest thing to a relationship between T levels and playing with your joystick in single (or two, even) player mode is that abstaining for 7 days causes a temporary spike, with day 8 putting you back to where you were originally.
Source: some science article I remember reading years ago that I’m not about to google for on my work computer.
Didn’t know you were a fan of science, took you as more of a faith guy.
Science and faith work hand-in-hand. Made it that way on purpose.
I’m not a doctor, but I’m pretty sure you have a problem