Jessa is more in touch with reality than the other three, but she can be the most cold hearted. See any episode where she has a man in her life – the family she babysat for, when she got married, and the ex-boyfriend she went on a coke binge with. She’s pure evil.
Since TFM probably won’t publish my submission, here’s the TL;DR:
Spent a summer in college working an internship in a little hick town. It was just me, my boss for the summer (a woman roughly 30-ish who was cheating on her then husband with a townie she met), and another chick about 25, surrounded by several thousand cowboys in the middle of nowhere. Three of us went out one night, the girls are immediately hit on by a group of locals out for a birthday / bachelor party or something. I get blackout, start talking to these guys since I don’t know anyone within 1,000 miles. Somehow NASCAR comes up and I start making the jokes that EmailKing covered above. One of the guys got really pissed so I just keep calling him Dale Jr., Kyle Petty, and whatever other names I could think of. Dude warns me to stop, I don’t. A while later I walk in to take a piss and he’s at the stall next to me. I look over and make another Dale Jr. joke and he says something to the effect of, “I gave you a chance to shut your mouth.” He waits for me to put my manhood away and proceeds to punch me twice. I’m so drunk / in such disbelief I just start laughing at the guy. His friends grab him and pull him out of the bathroom, we eventually apologize to each other over a round of shots, worst headache of my life the next few days.
When did your real life grandma ever tell your parents when you did something wrong or broke a rule? Never. She looked the other way while making sure you got an extra cookie with your milk. Same thing happens with work grandma.
“Well, so, I was texting a few of the girls and we’ve never been to the Derby before either, so, and this wasn’t my idea, but I think we’re going too. We’ll have separate rooms and everything. It’ll be so fun, right sweetie?”
Again, I’m going to take Meh’s here, but Denver changed a lot after CO legalized weed and it hasn’t been for the better. Smoke whatever you want, but that choice had an overall negative impact on the city.
Down vote me all you want people from Chicago, St Louis, California and Texas who didn’t grow up there. Have fun on your 3 hour drive home from fucking Keystone on Sunday. I’m not a NATIVE (dumbest bumper stickers ever, by the way) but I stand by my statement.
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The lady who sits next to me has some sort of Pokémon sound every time she gets a text.
Worked with a health nut who put leftover tilapia and broccoli in the microwave every fucking day. She was despised.
I kept saying, “You always pick titties over kiddies.”
Corgi coming in underrated at 20. Wife convinced me to get one a few years ago, fast forward to my best friend ever.
Jessa is more in touch with reality than the other three, but she can be the most cold hearted. See any episode where she has a man in her life – the family she babysat for, when she got married, and the ex-boyfriend she went on a coke binge with. She’s pure evil.
I most definitely did.
*PGP Whoops
Since TFM probably won’t publish my submission, here’s the TL;DR:
Spent a summer in college working an internship in a little hick town. It was just me, my boss for the summer (a woman roughly 30-ish who was cheating on her then husband with a townie she met), and another chick about 25, surrounded by several thousand cowboys in the middle of nowhere. Three of us went out one night, the girls are immediately hit on by a group of locals out for a birthday / bachelor party or something. I get blackout, start talking to these guys since I don’t know anyone within 1,000 miles. Somehow NASCAR comes up and I start making the jokes that EmailKing covered above. One of the guys got really pissed so I just keep calling him Dale Jr., Kyle Petty, and whatever other names I could think of. Dude warns me to stop, I don’t. A while later I walk in to take a piss and he’s at the stall next to me. I look over and make another Dale Jr. joke and he says something to the effect of, “I gave you a chance to shut your mouth.” He waits for me to put my manhood away and proceeds to punch me twice. I’m so drunk / in such disbelief I just start laughing at the guy. His friends grab him and pull him out of the bathroom, we eventually apologize to each other over a round of shots, worst headache of my life the next few days.
I can’t decide which of the girls is least likeable. Still waiting for Shoshana to flash her knockers for us one time though.
Going back a year, but what was Bryan Williams’ reaction to Desi giving his daughter a rim job. Yikes.
I once got in a bar fight over making fun of NASCAR. You guys are passionate, among other things.
“Consulting: If you don’t have a solution, there’s plenty of money to be made in prolonging the problem.”
Agreed. This is PGP, not IDroppedOutOfHighSchoolP
Will is the Monix to Very Respectfully’s Kyle.
When did your real life grandma ever tell your parents when you did something wrong or broke a rule? Never. She looked the other way while making sure you got an extra cookie with your milk. Same thing happens with work grandma.
“Well, so, I was texting a few of the girls and we’ve never been to the Derby before either, so, and this wasn’t my idea, but I think we’re going too. We’ll have separate rooms and everything. It’ll be so fun, right sweetie?”
I can’t imagine a worse highway in the country to puke on, regardless of which direction from downtown you were heading.
A former co-worker once told me “If God took a shit it’d land in Denton no matter which way the wind was blowing”
Again, I’m going to take Meh’s here, but Denver changed a lot after CO legalized weed and it hasn’t been for the better. Smoke whatever you want, but that choice had an overall negative impact on the city.
$27. Sorry. Paid $1.59 for gas yesterday and wished it was $3.39
Down vote me all you want people from Chicago, St Louis, California and Texas who didn’t grow up there. Have fun on your 3 hour drive home from fucking Keystone on Sunday. I’m not a NATIVE (dumbest bumper stickers ever, by the way) but I stand by my statement.