Aspiring to be casually rich and office hot, while plugging away at an entry level job that promises a pension and good benefits because #compromise and idk maybe I’ll make enough to buy a fancy Japanese toilet.
I have a tendency to run away and/or move to foreign countries when life gets "too real" or I'm feeling restless. This has resulted in me being both single af and struggling to buy a studio apartment where my bed folds into a wall.
Champagne taste, sparkling water budget; so my 5 year plan is to marry money -and then ride out the alimony payments once he realizes what a nightmare I am.
Lived in NYC, the people who actually live in the city and have the space for this tree in their apartment could totally drop that amount of coin on an overpriced cut tree, and totally will. And are insufferable enough to brag about this instead of hide in shame. New Yorkers are crazy. And also my favourite.
That said my tree was $20 at Home Depot and tossing it up was a minimal effort two person job. And I got a coupon for $25 off my next $100 purchase.
Exactly. I don’t think I’ve owned an actual alarm clock since like 2006. My roommate used to throw the power for kicks when she was lonely and wanted attention (still BFFs) and I quickly learned my Motorola razor was more reliable than something plugged into a damn wall without a backup battery.
With produce I generally have at least 50% of my basket being apples: super long shelf life so I’m at worst only a 50% failure at being a real person. Plus I feel when I chase my lunch with one at work I give off a healthy and productive vibe.
Exactly. No where I’ve never gotten the scaries? In the cereal isle buying Reece’s peanut butter puffs. Brings you back to a simpler time.
Ashamed of my shopping habits? Yes. But scaries? No.
Happens to the best of us. I lost out on a contract for a government (read: union) job and I’m still bummed like 5 years later, but I got fired from a well paying shit-show of a job with a company culture that was the worst fit for me and after being initially upset it lead to much better things and honestly it’s probably one of the better things that have happened to me. Plus now I’m pretty good at spotting red flags in interviews, and that’s a crucial life skill.
You’ve got savings and a degree that’s useful and in demand. You’ll be fine. Best of luck with your new job!
Not thrilled about this statistic but I’d throw it around 35%. I’ve found that type also posts a significant amount of selfies with “inspirational quotes” and is like *super* into following a specific sports team and demonstrates this by wearing all that teams merch and heavily discussing their passion only when continently there are boys around.
As bad as it is for the Todd’s of you out there I think it’s worse for girls to have to endure this behaviour from our fringe friends because we know EXACTLY what those bitches are up to, and it’s just like watching a really stupid driver get in an accident.
To be fair I don’t think this is a right or left issue. Neither party should disapprove more of saying you’re onboard with murdering a kid mostly because you see his race as a threat. Just paints republicans in a bad/racist light.
I’m a fan of “Fiancée”. In a world where “hooking up” and “seeing someone” can mean a range of things fiancée is a solid word. You’re clearly not just dating but also haven’t fully committed to marriage. Simple. Clear. And it’s not like there’s an alternative non-French word we would use instead. Plus it’s (verbably) gender neutral which is something I would assume the Times target demographic would be on board with.
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Millennial rom-coms will have this as the beginning of the story meet-cute. I love it.
Lived in NYC, the people who actually live in the city and have the space for this tree in their apartment could totally drop that amount of coin on an overpriced cut tree, and totally will. And are insufferable enough to brag about this instead of hide in shame. New Yorkers are crazy. And also my favourite.
That said my tree was $20 at Home Depot and tossing it up was a minimal effort two person job. And I got a coupon for $25 off my next $100 purchase.
Exactly. I don’t think I’ve owned an actual alarm clock since like 2006. My roommate used to throw the power for kicks when she was lonely and wanted attention (still BFFs) and I quickly learned my Motorola razor was more reliable than something plugged into a damn wall without a backup battery.
With produce I generally have at least 50% of my basket being apples: super long shelf life so I’m at worst only a 50% failure at being a real person. Plus I feel when I chase my lunch with one at work I give off a healthy and productive vibe.
Know*
Fuck that’s gonna haunt me.
Firing usually happens on a Friday. Mondays are a slap on the wrist for making a dick joke at worst.
Exactly. No where I’ve never gotten the scaries? In the cereal isle buying Reece’s peanut butter puffs. Brings you back to a simpler time.
Ashamed of my shopping habits? Yes. But scaries? No.
Wasn’t this basically just the plot of Mr. Deeds?
Happens to the best of us. I lost out on a contract for a government (read: union) job and I’m still bummed like 5 years later, but I got fired from a well paying shit-show of a job with a company culture that was the worst fit for me and after being initially upset it lead to much better things and honestly it’s probably one of the better things that have happened to me. Plus now I’m pretty good at spotting red flags in interviews, and that’s a crucial life skill.
You’ve got savings and a degree that’s useful and in demand. You’ll be fine. Best of luck with your new job!
Deserves a solid thank you card. Thank you notes are a lost art.
Casually dropping that you’re a homeowner. PGPM
How to be single was fantastic.
I travel too much, found that using a reusable bottle of conditioner does double duty and works amazingly as a shaving cream.
I appreciate your desperation. Sup?
LAX is the absolute worst.
You’re either in denial or lying. But since I’m a few months away from this bullet myself I’m forever thankful and hopeful in this.
Plot twist: Jill kidnaps Sperry after witnessing Girls neglect.
Not thrilled about this statistic but I’d throw it around 35%. I’ve found that type also posts a significant amount of selfies with “inspirational quotes” and is like *super* into following a specific sports team and demonstrates this by wearing all that teams merch and heavily discussing their passion only when continently there are boys around.
As bad as it is for the Todd’s of you out there I think it’s worse for girls to have to endure this behaviour from our fringe friends because we know EXACTLY what those bitches are up to, and it’s just like watching a really stupid driver get in an accident.
To be fair I don’t think this is a right or left issue. Neither party should disapprove more of saying you’re onboard with murdering a kid mostly because you see his race as a threat. Just paints republicans in a bad/racist light.
I’m a fan of “Fiancée”. In a world where “hooking up” and “seeing someone” can mean a range of things fiancée is a solid word. You’re clearly not just dating but also haven’t fully committed to marriage. Simple. Clear. And it’s not like there’s an alternative non-French word we would use instead. Plus it’s (verbably) gender neutral which is something I would assume the Times target demographic would be on board with.