Whenever the woman puts me in charge I’ve started making a second reservation at the same location a half hour later under a different name. I make it for about 60% of the number of people we originally expected because whenever you roll 8+ deep you gotta expect some bitching out. There’s always bitching out.
Sketchy looking kid pretty much ambushed me in a parking lot a few weeks ago needing some beer. Saw a tinted-out unmarked car in the back of the parking lot. Wouldn’t put it past northern Virginia to pull off a sting like that. Probably caught the kid smoking a joint and left him with an ultimatum.
One of the reasons I chose to go with a dog that was part boxer when I adopted was because when I looked up the boxer breed, one of the qualities was “farts a lot.” I haven’t farted since.
Just wanna apologize in advance to all the college girls who will happen to land a gig at the country club I will reside at when I’m in my later years. I will compensate by uncomfortably over-tipping.
For the first time in my life, I holed out from about 75 yards the other day. As I walked up to the green, I had the single most euphoric feeling a man could experience. The breeze in my hair, the birds singing, a slight 3-beer buzz. I closed my eyes, and felt on top of the world.
I was alone. Not another human in sight. Only God saw, and that’s perfectly okay. For that moment, that second, it was the only thing that mattered in the world.
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I keep having this dream mine will triple if I take it to the horse track…
I’m gonna have to pull out the race card here.
So did I make the squad tho?
Whenever the woman puts me in charge I’ve started making a second reservation at the same location a half hour later under a different name. I make it for about 60% of the number of people we originally expected because whenever you roll 8+ deep you gotta expect some bitching out. There’s always bitching out.
Oh and Larry’s daughter’s IG: CazzieDavid
Fire flame
Pretty, pretty good
Is that Vince Howard?
Sketchy looking kid pretty much ambushed me in a parking lot a few weeks ago needing some beer. Saw a tinted-out unmarked car in the back of the parking lot. Wouldn’t put it past northern Virginia to pull off a sting like that. Probably caught the kid smoking a joint and left him with an ultimatum.
Santiago was the next Jimmy Graham
“Mayonnaise” fucked me in my 5th grade spelling bee. The other kid got cabinet. Cabinet!
Try not to use the bathrooms there
I thought Lace was going to be causing drunken drama until the end. I’m upset she decided to get her life together.
I know to not mix my Vicodin with my Cialis but it’s still nice to see the warning label.
A “Warning: NSFW and Gay” would have been nice to see next to that lemonparty hyperlink, you sick bastard.
I never do this, but it’s statute.
One of the reasons I chose to go with a dog that was part boxer when I adopted was because when I looked up the boxer breed, one of the qualities was “farts a lot.” I haven’t farted since.
Brian loved a good doughnut.
No one is begging you to join their league
Just wanna apologize in advance to all the college girls who will happen to land a gig at the country club I will reside at when I’m in my later years. I will compensate by uncomfortably over-tipping.
For the first time in my life, I holed out from about 75 yards the other day. As I walked up to the green, I had the single most euphoric feeling a man could experience. The breeze in my hair, the birds singing, a slight 3-beer buzz. I closed my eyes, and felt on top of the world.
I was alone. Not another human in sight. Only God saw, and that’s perfectly okay. For that moment, that second, it was the only thing that mattered in the world.