Windmill high-five + this interview with Cameron Diaz… yeah, there’s no way I will ever hate Tom Cruise. Dude fucking bleeds testosterone and charisma. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qexo0eI3eE4
On The Inside: Well, now that I’ve left the bar for food with this guy if I’m going to get laid at all tonight it’s going to be with him. He mentioned that he has a car, right? Beats cab fare. Guess we’re going this, I just hope his place isn’t a shithole.
I saw an ad for an unpaid internship seeking an electrical engineering major and I replied with a resume (pdf, obviously) with just a giant LOL in the middle of the page.
There’s pizza, and then there’s the most delicious crust loaded with toppings and sauce, ON THE FING TOP!! Perfectly cooked Chicago deep dish almost makes up for everything wrong with that place, but then there is the cubs soooo….
One huge difference: half-drunk survivalists muttering to themselves in their favorite lazy-boys while watching Glen Beck aren’t blowing up my newsfeed by jumping on some Kony2012 style bandwagon of epic proportions every week.
1. Tolerance — Is this some kind of joke?
The majority of millennials are liberal and liberal mellennials are some of the least tolerant people you’ll ever meet. Just tell one, for example, that you believe marriage should be between a man and a woman to see how tolerant they really are for yourself. They will treat you immediately like you’re Satan. So much for tolerance or “the ability or willingness to tolerate something, in particular the existence of opinions or behavior that one does not necessarily agree with” as Mr. Webster defines it, eh?
When I lived walking distance from the hockey arena I’d feel out my chances over drinks so that if they were good it was off to the hockey game with her and, if not, plan B with a friend. Couldn’t lose that way.
Now, the park is actually the go-to. Grab a 12-pack of beers or some wine along with snacks and the football/baseball/frisbee/basketball/tennis rackets/volleyball are already in the truck. Almost 0 effort and if the girl isn’t interested in any of those things she’s no fun anyways.
I hope you don’t mind if I ignore all of your advice except for #2, somebody has to keep things interesting. One thing I have learned though is two pairs of shoes.
Break out your slick new Italian dress shoes for the ceremony and throw on your previous pair for the reception that you thoroughly ruined at the last wedding you went to before adhering to this advice.
On Learning How To Talk To People: FOR FUCK’S SAKE, stop saying “like,” “you know,” and all that other nonsense filler repetitively. It makes you sound like a goddamned idiot.
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Toss up between Aaron Rodgers and Luke Bryan… would kill to have their dating pool. Hell, even Rodger’s bro is dating Miss Ohio.
I missed most of the shots in the second half of the video due to the hotness.
Windmill high-five + this interview with Cameron Diaz… yeah, there’s no way I will ever hate Tom Cruise. Dude fucking bleeds testosterone and charisma.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qexo0eI3eE4
On The Inside: Well, now that I’ve left the bar for food with this guy if I’m going to get laid at all tonight it’s going to be with him. He mentioned that he has a car, right? Beats cab fare. Guess we’re going this, I just hope his place isn’t a shithole.
Man, if I drove a tank I would fly through that bitch giving zero fucks.
I saw an ad for an unpaid internship seeking an electrical engineering major and I replied with a resume (pdf, obviously) with just a giant LOL in the middle of the page.
There’s pizza, and then there’s the most delicious crust loaded with toppings and sauce, ON THE FING TOP!! Perfectly cooked Chicago deep dish almost makes up for everything wrong with that place, but then there is the cubs soooo….
Yeah, the guy is amazing from a zero to hero standard money wise buy you have to sell your soul to pull the shit he does on his followers.
One huge difference: half-drunk survivalists muttering to themselves in their favorite lazy-boys while watching Glen Beck aren’t blowing up my newsfeed by jumping on some Kony2012 style bandwagon of epic proportions every week.
To infinity and beyond (way, way, way over your head) and you even threw in a red herring for good measure. Case in point.
Feel free to cool the jets my point flew on with the fun fact that I have nothing against gays getting married, it was only an example.
1. Tolerance — Is this some kind of joke?
The majority of millennials are liberal and liberal mellennials are some of the least tolerant people you’ll ever meet. Just tell one, for example, that you believe marriage should be between a man and a woman to see how tolerant they really are for yourself. They will treat you immediately like you’re Satan. So much for tolerance or “the ability or willingness to tolerate something, in particular the existence of opinions or behavior that one does not necessarily agree with” as Mr. Webster defines it, eh?
The incurable I had on my last plane flight out of Austin still haunts me.
Well, dammit, you successfully made me momentarily hate that I have a window office with a door.
Zoos are incredibly depressing. Look, a Lion! Once a master of the African Savannah, captured and caged, like you in a cubical M-F. Fuck Zoos.
“Behind every good man is a good woman, and hopefully Stacy would be on top of me before she was behind me, because that would mean that I scored.”
Certified platinum Bri-Bri.
When I lived walking distance from the hockey arena I’d feel out my chances over drinks so that if they were good it was off to the hockey game with her and, if not, plan B with a friend. Couldn’t lose that way.
Now, the park is actually the go-to. Grab a 12-pack of beers or some wine along with snacks and the football/baseball/frisbee/basketball/tennis rackets/volleyball are already in the truck. Almost 0 effort and if the girl isn’t interested in any of those things she’s no fun anyways.
I hope you don’t mind if I ignore all of your advice except for #2, somebody has to keep things interesting. One thing I have learned though is two pairs of shoes.
Break out your slick new Italian dress shoes for the ceremony and throw on your previous pair for the reception that you thoroughly ruined at the last wedding you went to before adhering to this advice.
On Learning How To Talk To People: FOR FUCK’S SAKE, stop saying “like,” “you know,” and all that other nonsense filler repetitively. It makes you sound like a goddamned idiot.
Kara, is that you?
Pro-Tip: you can also hit up the liquor section at Costco without a membership in California.