Our vendors have decided to double the cost for everything because my manager is a poor relationship manager. PGP.

Fell asleep drunk in my Uber ride home on Saturday night. PGP.

Burned my bagel this morning. PGP.

Someone just farted while walking by my cube. PGP.

I got high off of my coffee today. PGP.

Meeting with my boss. Apply for new jobs. End up in the same office the next morning. Repeat. PGP.

Burned myself while ironing my shirt this morning. PGP.

A typo on my new business cards. PGP.

The summer intern whom I’d never spoken to added me on LinkedIn after his last day. PGP.

My car was fully covered in bird shit this morning. PGP.