Reading articles about office productivity hacks with zero intention of implementing any of them. PGP.

I wear headphones all day at work, partially because I enjoy listening to music, but mostly because I can’t stand the sound of my coworker’s voice.

I’ve fantasized about going full Terry Tate on every person in my office at least once.

Awkwardly walking away because you don’t know how to end your small talk at the water cooler. PGP.

Today, a small group of women gathered behind my desk to talk about breastfeeding. PGP.

They’re cleaning out the office fridge this weekend. I know this because I’ve received three emails about it. PGP.

Waking up early to go to the gym, and leaving your gym bag at home. PGP.

Instinctively taking your Gchat off the record. PGP.

The coworker that ends every email with an ellipses… PGP.

When “Hey, do you have a minute?” sucks hours out of your day. PGP.