My work wife is almost triple my age. PGP.

I have trouble believing it’s pure coincidence that my coworkers seem to only ask me to go to lunch when I have my lunch box visible on my desk. PGP.

Is it a bad move for me to ask our new temp hire if she’d like to connect with me on LinkedIn? PGP.

I don’t like the new Google logo. PGP.

Just realized that the year 2015 is two-thirds over already, and I have yet to get laid during it. PGP.

Your married Facebook friends posting sappy romantic shit on each other’s Walls. PGP.

When someone you know views your LinkedIn profile, then neglects to connect with you. PGP.

“[Facebook friend] was tagged in a life event.” I wonder how much the ring cost? PGP.

Deciding to postpone your shopping trip upon recognizing a former high school classmate’s car in the parking lot. PGP.

Passed out after work and missed the entire GOP debate. PGP.