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I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – if you’re looking for a freak fest, look no further than the Olympic Village. If you take a group of athletes at their physical peak and toss them in the most stressful situations of their entire lives, you’re going to be left with a bunch of people trying to blow off some steam. I’m under the impression that the Winter Olympics would be better for hooking up (because fireplaces) than the Summer Olympics (because Zika), but both are going to lead to an increased amount of casual encounters.
As we all know, if you’re single, you have two options: download every dating app in the game or die alone. And just because these people are Olympic athletes, that doesn’t mean they’re too good for Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, or whatever. In fact, there’s an Instagram account that’s solely dedicated to outing which athletes are actually on Tinder and Bumble. Here are some of the best profiles they’ve come across.
And that’s just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to all the Olympians trying to get theirs. The two accounts (which are run by the same person) are logging anyone and everyone they can find, presumably by using the Tinder Plus function where you can remotely put yourself in another part of the world and swipe on whoever you want.
Look out, 2036 Olympics. Might be some straight-up athletes whose parents made it official at Rio. .
[via @RioTinder / @SportsSwipe]
If you enjoy Olympic banter and really bad ideas on how to improve future Olympic Games, listen to the most recent episode of Touching Base on iTunes, or listen on SoundCloud below.
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Will
Will (Twitter / Instagram) is the host of The Sunday Scaries Podcast.
@willdefries
@willdefries
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Would swipe right on every water polo girl.
Every girl*
DIBS ON MATHEWSON
Fine. If you need me, I’ll be in Rio proposing to every woman from the Sweden team
If the USA is serious about world domination, we need a (lot of) LeBron (I know he isn’t at this one) and Serena Williams love child.
Eugenics. PGPM.
Ryan Lochte, go figure
Anyone else remember Lochte’s interviews from years back?
Chyeah!
There was one where he stated his favorite part of the Olympic Village was the free McDonalds…
His show on E! that made him look like such a douche bag… It was hard to watch
Didn’t his Mom even get quoted telling all the girls that he was only interested in smashing and nothing more?
Doesn’t Rickie have a girlfriend or something?
Good god, I thought Fowler looked stupid before with his flat brimmed doofus hats and shaggy hair. Now he looks worse, somehow.
In case you haven’t been around top-level female athletes, a word to the wise: most of them are fucking crazy. Male athletes tend to be meatheads with very little going on between their ears. Female athletes tend to be extremely focused, dedicated, and committed. Intense is the word that comes to mind. I knew a girl in college who played TWO DI varsity sports on scholarship. She’d leave Saturday parties early so she could go run 15 or 20 miles on her off day, Sunday. Crazy.
Sounds like the girl you describe is dedicated to her sports and wants to be a contributing teammate who understands she has to miss a few parties for a workout so she can get a free or nearly free education.