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Yesterday, we brought you a man standing on the side of a highway wearing a dress. He clearly lost his fantasy football league by a wide margin and was forced to do so, which prompted me to imagine what other punishments are out there for last-place finishers.
The results? While some weren’t all that shocking, some just sound downright miserable.
Here are some of the worst from my league and some others I have heard of before
1) Have to take the ACT and score above a 20 to stay in the league
2) Man-date with second to last, last wears a dress and second to last buys dinner
3) tied-eyed front car license plate with losers initials on it for a year
I’m kind of bummed that taking the ACT/SAT has become par for the course, but I’m also very distracted by the fact that this guy can’t spell “tie-dyed.”
If I’m being honest, though, I’d rather wear the dress to dinner and get a free dinner than be the second-to-last place guy who has to pay. Not sure what that says about me.
-take the ACT test again
-try out for the local Frontier League baseball team (Gateway Grizzlies)
-participate in photoshoot to create a (not) sexy calendar (Ex: a big redneck in daisy dukes looking back at the camera whilst bent over a tractor)
Keep up the above average work!
I guess I don’t see why you’d do any photoshoot that wasn’t George Costanza on a chaise lounge.
Our fantasy league is full of current Georgetown students. Our last place finishers has to spend 24 hours on campus in a French maid costume doing errands for the other league members.
24 hours? So this guy is, like, sleeping in a tent on the Georgetown campus?
Runner up: Wear a choker to the bars for a night
1st Place: Re-take the SATs at your old high school
Having to wear a choker at the bars for a night might be my favorite punishment that I received. It’s enough that you don’t want to do it, but not enough that you’d completely try to get out of it. I mean, you can’t look any worse than every other girl does wearing one so might as well just work it.
The loser in our league as to do a routine at the comedy club. The material is written by the playoff teams and can not be altered.
If there isn’t a YouTube video of this entire routine, your friend group has failed as a fantasy league.
I’m in two leagues and both punishments are pretty brutal. In one league the loser must run a milk mile. He must chug a quart a whole milk, run a quarter mile, then chug another quart and so on until he has drank an entire gallon of milk and run a mile. Obviously the point is for the loser to throw up.
The other league, the loser must get a custom fathead of the winner and display it on the wall of his house in either his living room or bedroom until next year.
This actually sucks because as someone who has tried printing a custom Fathead of Kid Rock before, I know that custom Fatheads are expensive.
In our league the loser has to bake a cake and drive it to the winner. No fecal matter, pubic hair, or any other tempering is allowed to said cake. We have people located all over the country. Right now a guy from North Carolina is in the running to bake the cake and drive it to Boston, or worse, Presque Isle Maine. We’ll know next week who makes the trip.
That’s just miserable. I guess you can turn the entire excursion into a nice little bender, but the drive home would be one of the more depressing experiences one could think of.
The winner of our fantasy league gets to pick who the loser of our league asks to formal. If the girl says no, the winner gets to keep picking girls the loser has to ask until one says yes.
I mean, you have to start with a fairly bottom-tier girl, right? If you’re going top-shelf, you’re just doing this guy a favor.
I think my league has a pretty good punishment for the member who finishes last, otherwise known as ‘the pledge’. You see, each year we spend a weekend drafting our teams (and playing golf, drinking beer, failing at hitting on chicks, etc.) at a location chosen by the winner of the previous year. During draft weekend, the pledge must perform whatever is asked of him by any other league member.
Activities include:
Making beer runs
Retrieving and opening beers for league members
Cleaning up after weekend activities
Performing caddy like duties on the golf course
Setting up drinking games
Cooking lunch/dinnerAs you can see, none of these activities get too out of hand. However, being bossed around by 9 of your closest friends for a weekend is reason enough to avoid finishing last in the league.
I’d probably absolutely lose my shit if I were replacing divots and fixing ball marks on greens for my friends because of a stupid game that I lost online.
I lost my fantasy football league, and I have to get a full body wax, including a Brazilian wax. I’m Italian and Puerto Rican
Nah. Nope. Not happening. .
Image via YouTube
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Will
Will (Twitter / Instagram) is the host of The Sunday Scaries Podcast.
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A couple of years ago our last place finisher had to enter an amateur mma fight.
That might be enough to scare me into going to the gym once in a while.
Did he tap our or get knocked out? Need some clarification here.
Tapped early
tied-eyed
Every time I say/see/hear “tie-dye” from now on, I’m going to think of that
Fuck.
Look who’s not a 90s kid.
My fantasy league makes the loser protest circumcision for an hour on the busiest street corner in town
I’m in a league that requires the loser to get frosted tips
Unpopular opinion. I’m a fan of girls wearing chokers out. Especially if they keep it on during.
During the drafte we voted on personalized punishments for each player if they came in last place.
Guy who went to Miami: would have to wear an FSU jersey every night we went out that month. If more than the half the league was going out he was required to attend.
Guy who hates exercising: had to run a 10k
Guy who rages every time his masculinity is questioned: has to go to a gay bar and offer to buy at least 10 guys drinks
Insecure guy: Had to wear a diaper to the bar
Guy who absolutely hates his feet: would have to get a foot massage
I would’ve had to get frosted tips.
Guy who had to wear the diaper came in last place and refused to do it. Was banished from the league since 2012 and will not be readmitted until he does his punishment.
As a teacher, I would be very concerned to see someone not of high school age in my classroom taking the ACT/SAT. I’d have to ask what the hell was going on and I’d give them SO much shit.
My buddy’s dad is 58 and plays with us.. He had to go take the ACT last year
Where does a high school teacher have to score in order to retain the respect of his students? 30-34?
I’m just saying it’s worse for the teacher in that scenario because if he just mails it in and gets a 20 those kids are going to tear him a new one all year
The SAT/ACT is totally played out. Why is no one making the losers retake the AP tests? I’d love to see one of my idiot friends get a 1 in Chemistry.
They only offer those tests in May, whereas SAT/ACT are year-round.
As an Indian, I really feel for that last guy…
do they do the balls too? Asking for a friend
Ran into some guys at a tailgate a few weeks back, right when Fantasy Playoffs were starting. Their punishment was the loser had to put “truck nuts” on their car for an entire year.
They were mostly Auburn grads, so it could be a reward for them–but I thought that was pretty brutal punishment. Especially if you drive a coupe/smaller car.