The Weekday Hookup Is Infinitely Better Than Its Weekend Counterpart

The Weekday Hookup Is Infinitely Better Than Its Weekend Counterpart

On a weekday, heading out to a watering hole to watch a big game or simply because of peer pressure, is ill-advised. There just comes a point in every person’s professional life where the repercussions for a late night out on, say a Wednesday, simply aren’t worth it.

The crippling hangover, judgmental looks from coworkers, and the simple fact that there is work to be done – it all just piles up when you choose to hit up a bar and actually get drunk on a weekday. As with anything, though, there are exceptions. Sometimes the moon and the stars align on an idle Tuesday or Wednesday night out at a bar and you get lucky.

You hit it off with a total stranger and before you know it, it’s 12:30 a.m. You two are in a cab back to your place and for the moment, work is the farthest thing on your mind.

The weeknight hookup is totally different from one that you would encounter on a Friday or Saturday. The vibe is just something else entirely and it’s difficult to explain.

It’s playing on turf when you’re used to grass or feeling like you have to adjust your shot because the arena you’re playing this game in is much larger than you’re used to. The hoop is still 10 feet high, as Gene Hackman will show you in Hoosiers. The measurements of the court are the exact same as the little gym in Hickory, Indiana.

You still have all of the abilities that you usually do to win a girl over. On a weeknight, it takes a little more, though. Everything’s gotta bounce your way but (and this is a big but) when it does – oh, boy. What a feeling that is.

I’d argue that the weekday hookup is actually much better than a one night stand on a Friday night for one very important reason.

When you have an adult sleepover there are a few steadfast, commonly accepted practices that are followed. The first and most important one being that you’re not going to physically shake someone awake and tell them to leave your home no matter how annoyed you are. It just doesn’t happen. I know we all like to sit there at brunch and tell our friends about how we kicked our one-night stand to the curb as soon as we woke up, but no one actually has the backbone to do that.

We’d all like to be as upfront and honest with how we feel as Larry David is but there are rules in a society, and one of them is that you can’t actually tell a one night stand to get the hell out of your bed on a Saturday morning.

You have to get up and pretend to start cleaning. You have to make up an excuse that you have a yoga class to get to. You jump through hoops and walk on eggshells to figure out the most polite way to get that girl or guy out of bed and into an Uber.

The beauty of the weekday hookup is that you can toss this first rule out the window completely. There’s no dancing around the subject of leaving on a Wednesday morning.

“Hey, stranger that I just met seven hours ago? Would you mind waking your ass up? I don’t trust you enough to sleep in my bed while I get ready for work so if you wouldn’t mind leaving I’d appreciate it.”

The normal rules just don’t apply when you have to be up at 6:30 or 7:00 a.m. to get ready for work. I don’t know about you, but when I wake up with a hangover, I’m not the most chipper person in the world. All of that shit about wanting someone to be able to sleep next to in bed? You can forget about that when I’m hungover. I need space. I need quiet. And probably the last thing I need is another human being in my bed that I have to be kind, courteous, and warm towards.

On the weekend, I’ll put on a nice show for a guest that is sleeping over. Not during the week, though. There are too many other things to take care of during the work week. And I’m not saying the sole reason the weekday hookup is cool is because you can be rude to the person you just bumped uglies with. The weekday hookup is cool because everything about it is different.

So what am I suggesting? I’m merely asking you to try going out on a random Tuesday or Wednesday and letting the chips fall where they may. Hell, try it out tonight – although I think we can all come to a consensus that Thursday is the new Friday so I’m not sure it counts as a weekday hookup.

People go to bars to get hit on, and if you can find a partner on a weekday I think you’ll find that it’s a lot more fun than it is on a Friday or Saturday night out. It’s got a magical quality to it that the weekend can’t give you. I know it sounds reckless, irresponsible, and daunting. It’s fun because it’s unusual, and during the monotony of a work week I believe we’d all agree that it’s nice every now and then to throw caution to the wind.

Image via Unsplash

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Johnny D

fashion icon. @dudaronomy on twitter. e-mail:

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