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Dwayne Johnson AKA Rocky Maivia AKA The People’s Champ AKA The Rock posted a picture to Instagram today stating that he will be remaking the ’90s classic film Jumanji.
EVERYBODY SHUT UP AND CALM DOWN.
Sorry, I know every single one of you was about to be all “but wah wah muh childhood” or “wah wah a disgrace to Robin Williams’ legacy.” Spare me. Robin Williams was a comedic genius and the original was fantastic, but come on. If Jumanji is your favorite Robin Williams piece, you’ve got a lot of standup specials and reruns of Mork and Mindy to run through. Also Hook, Dead Poets Society, Good Will Hunting, Popeye and The Birdcage to watch. I’d prefer not to remember Robin Williams with anything involving David Alan Grier.
The Rock is a modern-day Yul Brenner. He hasn’t had a chance to make a really good movie, despite spectacular comedic chops (have you seen The Other Guys?) and the fact that I’ve had a bro crush on him since he was in the Nation of Domination. San Andreas was enjoyable enough, mostly through sheer force of CGI will and jiggly costars.
The first Jumanji had first-gen CGI and a plethora of people who didn’t deserve to make it to the new millennium (Mr. Williams notwithstanding). It’s perfect for a remake and I can’t wait to see The Rock drop a People’s Elbow on a Crocodile.
Image via Instagram/@therock
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If you don’t love the Rock I don’t trust you
If you don’t like the original, I don’t trust you.
I like the Rock and Jumanji the same way I like Ice cream and steak. I don’t see a good outcome for either of those combinations though.
Jumanji still scares me. I’m 26.
If being excited for this is wrong, I don’t want to be right.
Movie will be trash like every other movie he has been in. That’s not to say it won’t be entertaining though. Not something you should go to the theaters for, but worth a watch when it comes out on Netflix.
Somebody embed this for me:
http://i.imgur.com/ji3rn9k.gifv
Got you, fam.
Shit I guess not.
Will somebody please explain to me how the hell you embed gifs and pics in comments, I’ve been trying to figure that out since I started reading TFM in college
Go to giphy.com and find a gif that you want. Then scroll down below it and copy the iframe embed link that’s there. Paste that link and BOOM it’s gif time
https://media.giphy.com/media/NtVAUjZdMxL4Q/200w.gif
God fucking dammit
Don’t mind me, just seeing if it works
via
Update: it worked
Take out the * (needed it to break the code so it would show up) and insert the url of the pic you want in the quotes
I can’t even do it wrong right
Everything The Rock does is fire. This should be no different.
Fuck re-making movies for no goddamn reason.
Whoever downvoted this probably thought the remake of Point Break was cool.
Batman Begins, dog.
Something like Batman Begins is different in my opinion. This is lazy. Maybe make it a sequel with an original script. But why do a straight remake? What’s wrong with the first one? It’s even worse when they do something like Point Break or Robocop that were awesome because they’re like time capsules from when they were made.
But you’re right on Point Break. There is only one.
All downvoters in this Column are just Rock fanboys. They can’t even fucking gif straight, don’t worry about it.