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I’m not proclaiming myself to be an expert in the dating world, but I will give myself credit when credit is due – I know how to crush a first date. Do girls quickly realize by the third or fourth date that I’m complete trash? Well, yeah, but that’s not the point here.
I started having a conversation with a few fellow coworkers the other day about first dates, and after some debate on etiquette, I mentioned some foods you avoid ordering on a first date. I was amazed that this wasn’t widely accepted among the group. There are just some foods you have no business shoveling into your mouth while trying to carry on a get-to-know-you conversation with someone, which is more than the likely the first time you’ve been around each other sober. See below if you want truth-bombs dropped on you about foods to avoid on first dates.
Ribs
If you’re ordering ribs, you should be taken out in the street and shot. I honestly would feel no sympathy for you if your date got up and left as soon as you turned to the waiter and said, “Yea, I think I’ll take the full rack of baby back ribs tonight!” You would think this is obvious, but I’ve heard of guys ordering this on a first date and I just can’t comprehend how you think that’s the move here. Being drenched in BBQ sauce from head to toe while gnawing on a pork bone and inevitably getting charred pork bits stuck in your teeth is not a good look. You’re sending an upfront statement here that you’re trash, and as I’ve stated above you should try to hide that fact for as long as you can.
Wings
Once again, you’re going to have chicken bits in your teeth and sauce all over you. This is a highly aggressive order for your first date and in no way shape or form a smart play. Watching you go through a whole roll of paper towels to wipe off your hot sauce-soaked face and hands is not going to get you a second date, and if it does, you need to run fast because she’s probably a psychopath. However, you would both probably be psychopaths so there could be some compatibility potential there. I’ve listened to the argument that boneless is acceptable, but for me it’s still a hard no. Ordering any type of wing is not putting out the proper vibes you need to be sending.
Salad
So I’m not as aggressively against this order, I just feel like the risk of getting something green stuck in your teeth is extremely high considering you’re eating a bowl-full of green shit. This is the sneaky little bastard that seems inconspicuous, but it will low-key torpedo your first date if not handled properly. Having anything in your teeth, especially a big fat piece of green lettuce, is the stuff first date nightmares are made of. It’s impossible to be charming and witty with that going on. I would highly suggest avoiding the silent killer at all cost. Also, if you’re going with ranch as your dressing, it is guaranteed to get on your face and make you look like a clown.
Spaghetti
Not only is there the obvious danger of getting sauce on your shirt, but the probability of also flinging it everywhere — including on your date — while trying to spiral the spaghetti on your fork is real. Honestly, this selection has less to do about the sauce and more to do with you slurping down noodles in front of someone you just met. The slurping sound is one of the most disgusting sounds known to man, and making it on a first date is once again putting out the trash vibe you want to cover up at all costs. Also, spaghetti gives off a kids’ menu vibe to me. You’re an adult, so order an adult adult-ish meal.
Keep it simple on your first date with food choices, guys. It shouldn’t be that difficult to do and yet I’ve heard and witnessed many people make this fatal flaw who later wonder why they didn’t get a second date. Your meal is one of the most overlooked pieces of the puzzle to a successful first date. You’re welcome, America..
Respond
What’s a date?
Meaning the fruit of the date palm?
As a guy, I would have mad respect for a chick that orders and takes down a plate of ribs on the first date.
Why not just have apps? Cheaper and you get to share. It also makes you seem adventurous because you can try a bunch.
Or just fill up on margs and free bread, whatever works.
Anything you eat with your hands seems worth avoiding on a first date. It’s hard to look attractive with anything on your hands, be it sauce, grease, seasoning, etc. Fork and knife only.
Reason #89 meeting for drinks for a first date is a better alternative than dinner
What do you think is more expensive: drinks or dinner? Maybe it depends on the city. 2 drinks @ $10/drink in NYC (relatively cheap there) gets pricey.
Just depends. Every girl has been offered drinks for a first date a thousand times, so if it’s someone you’re genuinely interested in I would suggest dinner to separate you from the pack. You do you though.
Beer and pizza. Everybody likes pizza, and it’s an easy getaway if things go south.
Anything Indian. I shouldn’t have to explain this one.
Who eats on a first date? Way too much pressure! Pretty sure meeting for just drinks is the perfect first date.
Grow up
I don’t understand how eating is any more pressure than drinking. Have a couple drinks beforehand and something at dinner to take the pressure off.
Honestly, a large part of my reasoning has to do with time. I can typically tell within the first 30 minutes of meeting someone whether or not I like them or they like me. Why waste 2 to 2.5 hours of their time and mine when I can politely make excuses after an hour if it’s not going to work out. Plus, drinks are way cheaper than a full meal so if it doesn’t look like it’s going forward the guy isn’t out $50. It really does make sense.
I suppose I can sort of buy into those points but not completely. It’s not like 2.5 hours is a long time and unless the person is really off putting I have a hard time making a judgement after just 30 minutes. The money aspect I could see how that may seem like a concern but if the difference between $30-$40 worth of drinks and a decent dinner is so terrifying you probably should have picked a different restaurant. Or you shouldn’t be going out because you should be looking for a second job.
Well my thought process comes from going out to dinner, not feeling and wasting his money. I feel really bad when I know there’s not going to be a second date and knowing that guy just dropped at least $30 on dinner when it could have been way less. Plus, since I typically like everyone I usually accept a second date anyway. The two times this theory proved super useful was: 1. He didn’t drink and 2. He brought up home schooling his future kids on the first date.
But going out to dinner is on the guy, not you (assuming he asked for the date). If he’s going in without the notion that there is a chance there isn’t chemistry, that’s his fault, not yours.
Avoid anything with garlic and you’re good.
A pro of being in a long-term relationship is that you can order ribs, make a complete mess, and only have a little shame.
Ice cream in a cone. Made this mistake myself one too many times.
Really? Based on every movie I saw during my formative years, ice cream and popsicles are the foods of slow motion montages for women.
Maybe have someone bring out a fan to blow your hair back next time, clearly the problem.