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Before everyone’s moms and grandmas infiltrated Facebook, it was a more honest time. A time where you’d write an inappropriate anecdote on your friend’s wall recounting the drunk night before. A time when you’d log in and see if anyone had “poked” you. A time when your newsfeed was filled with 60 photo albums (because that was the maximum amount of photos you could actually upload) filled with theme parties, Halloweens, spring breaks, and late night selfies.
Now? It’s couple’s therapy. You seemingly have to hire a professional photographer and make your way into a field in order to get 100 likes. Or, you know, have a kid.
And if you’re single? Facebook is no place for you – stick to Snapchat. Just started seeing someone? Hang out on Instagram’s activity tab to see which photos they’ve been liking. And only when you finally graduate to a full-blown relationship can you actually begin uploading photos to Facebook again.
Unfortunately, it’s not all gumdrops and unicorns for all the couples posting out there, per relationship expert and ‘sexologist’ (is that a thing?) Nikki Goldstein.
Often it’s the people who post the most who are seeking validation for their relationship from other people on social media.
The likes and comments can be so validating that when someone is really struggling, that’s where they get their up from – not the person making the gesture, but what other people will say about it.
I’ve had a long-standing theory that going “Facebook official” is the kiss of death for any relationship, but she insinuates that it’s much more than that. If you tell this to any self-respecting Instagrammer, she’ll tell you that “couples pictures get the most likes,” and she’s right.
She went on to ask, “Are we the same in the real world, away from our screens, and are we more concerned about how the relationship actually is, or are we more interested in how it looks online?” I hate to burst your bubble here, Nikki, but it’s 2017 – your relationship pretty much is online.
While you’re uploading your next photo of your boyfriend or girlfriend, you might want to do a deep dive and ensure those spring break pictures from 2006 have been scrubbed from your albums. Just an FYI. .
[via Daily Mail]
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Will
Will (Twitter / Instagram) is the host of The Sunday Scaries Podcast.
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Is this why I keep seeing people bringing those glowing palm sized things to the beach and looking at them most of the time? I don’t know much about them other than that people become very upset when they go in the water
Not having a significant other to even drunkenly post to your snapchat story, let alone Instagram. PGP.
We can change that…sup?
Awww, my first PGP sup! I’m honored.
But how else will people know my life is so much better than theirs?
Wow, up early on a Saturday posting away. You’re dedicated Will. Or you jumped on mybookie.ag and threw down on the PL.
A little of both.
Stock photo girl: Would
After the breakup, girl from oversharing couple will proceed to post self-inspirational quotes on her IG where her friends can comment “preach”, and tell her how amazing she is.
Went on Facebook and checked my feed for the first time in a while. Definitely wont be doing that again any time soon… Horrible place.
Thanks to all the drama surrounding the election I’ve “unfollowed” the hard majority of my followers. I don’t have much on my feed beyond food videos and animal pictures. Life’s much better that way.
Friends* not followers. I can’t even keep up with the lingo anymore. PGP.
I have wanted to delete Facebook for sometime now but I enjoy reading the shit show and drama people post about their lives too much.
People haven’t realized this? These relationships are also the best when the girl has to perform a cleanup of their ex.
I have no shame in admitting how giddy my girlfriend and I got when we discovered through some Facebook stalking that the chronic oversharing couple had broken up and the girl had already done her social media scrubbing.
Soooo happy my girlfriend literally does not have Facebook. Life is simpler.