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“They can take our lives, but they can never take our yoga pants.” At least, I think that’s what Braveheart screamed. Yoga pants are a fashion favorite on women of all shapes and sizes. Men, collectively, love them as well, but for different reasons that I don’t think I need to explain in full.
But not all men. Alan Sorrentino of Barrington, Rhode Island penned a letter to his local newspaper explaining how he believes women should stop wearing yoga pants. And unsurpisingly, his letter wasn’t well-received.
The letter can be read in full here:
Or, here it is transcribed in full.
To the editor:
The absolute worst thing to ever happen in women fashion is the recent development of yoga pants as daily wear outside the yoga studio.
Not since the mini-skirt has there been something worn by so many women who should never have it on in the first place.
From casual to formal, weddings, funerals, shopping, and even for the workplace, yoga pants are everywhere on women of all ages, usually paired with a blousy top and a pony tail hairdo. What a disaster!
Like the mini-skirt, yoga pants can be adorable on children and young women who have the benefit of nature’s blessing of youth. However, on mature, adult women there is something bizarre and disturbing about the appearance they make in public. Maybe it’s the unforgiving perspective they provide, inappropriate for general consumption, TMI, or the spector of someone coping poorly with their weight or advancing age that makes yoga pants so weird in public.
A nice pair of tailored slacks, jeans, or anything else would be better than those stinky, tacky, ridiculous looking yoga pants. They do nothing to compliment a women over 20 years old. In fact, the look is bad. Do yourself a favor, grow up and stop wearing them in public.
Besides, why would you want to wear something that’s seen on dozens of other women every day, everywhere? I thought women didn’t like doing that for obvious reasons. Yoga pants belong in the yoga studio. What’s next? Wearing a “Speedo” to the supermarket? Imagine if men did that. Yuck!
To all yoga pant wearers, I struggle with my own physicality as I age. I don’t want to struggle with yours. Thanks,
Alan Sorrentino
Barrington
I’m not sure what inspired his rant or his need to submit it to a print newspaper. He should’ve written it on his own personal blog where he can make fun of fashion trends like, you know, rompers. But that’s beside the point.
You can call him sexist or misogynistic for telling women how to dress – lord knows the rest of the internet is. There’s even a parade being coordinated for Sunday, October 21st where a large group of women wearing yoga pants are planning to strut by his house and taunt him with yoga pants. As of the time that I write this, the Facebook event for the Peaceful Yoga Pants Parade shows over 1,200 women interested in going with 500+ women fully committed.
In addition to the parade, Sorrentino has also received threats for his column (and has come out saying that it was just a joke). “It’s vicious and intimidating,” he said. “The fact that this is seen as an appropriate reaction to something I wrote in the paper is really disgusting.” While I agree that alleged death threats and swear-word-filled voicemails are completely over-the-top, Sorrentino should’ve known what he was getting into when he attempted to take away yoga pants from women in the middle of fall.
I’d say that this man is an evil genius who was just looking for the easiest way to get women to gather at his house wearing flattering yoga pants, but Sorrentino is openly gay so I’m going to go out on a limb and say that’s not what he was going for. .
[via CBS Boston / Boston.com]
Image via Instagram
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Will
Will (Twitter / Instagram) is the host of The Sunday Scaries Podcast.
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I’d that’s the punishment I’m gonna write a letter too.
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Fuck you, Demi.
Currently writing about how I hate when women wear only a sports bra while running. Address at bottom of article if anyone feels the need to protest…
Yoga pants is a guaranteed blessing by the Lord. Peace be with you!
And also with you.
Thanks!
Stock photo girl can get it. Wowza.
https://www.instagram.com/emilydidonato/?hl=en
You all are very welcome.
No idea what this guys end game is but I’m excited to see where this leads
As far as I am aware I don’t think any women are wearing yoga pants to weddings or funerals. Are you?
I wouldn’t mind seeing yoga pants at a funeral. Probably would help cheer me up
This guy is simultaneously the gayest (bitching about women’s fashion) and the ungayest (using clever ploy to get yoga-panted women to visit his house) man ever
I think they’re disgusting. If this makes you mad, please proceed to my address to scold me so I can observe this.
About to put on yoga pants to protest this right now.
Or ya know for comfort.
Sup?
This man is a genius
Claiming to be gay, criticizing yoga pants. Dude is a master at playing the long game.