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You’re probably well aware of the “ghosting” phenomenon tormenting you and the rest of your carefree millennial friends. For those of you who are already tied down or don’t read this site on a regular basis, ghosting is the incredibly ballsy act of ending a relationship by cutting off all ties and communication with the other person. It’s the Irish Goodbye of the dating game, and according to a study conducted by the dating service Plenty Of Fish, 80% of millennial singles have been ghosted.
Seems like a high number, given that it’s lazy, weak and cowardly, but in the age of safe spaces, I guess that’s to be expected. Luckily for us, we’ve got a new take on that phenomenon, and it’s just plain cold blooded. Haunting.
Haunting, the logical next step after ghosting, is basically the act of indirectly reminding your ex that you’re still alive by hitting their average Instagram with a double-tap (assuming it still shows up on your feed), liking their sanctimonious Facebook posts, or just viewing their Snap story so your name pops up when they check their opens. That’s pretty cutthroat to just go silent on someone but still put out a faint “I still kinda care” vibe.
It’s full blown mental warfare, and for that reason, haunting is as bad if not worse than ghosting because of our natural way of overthinking things. One minute you’re posting a top-tier ‘gram, showing the world that you’re moving on with your life, and then bam – the third like is from that girl you went on three dates with and haven’t heard from in two months. Only 3 likes after 5 minutes, too. That’s tough. You’ll spend the next 30 minutes wondering if she was mocking your awkward smile, or if she’s genuinely happy to see that you’re at brunch like every other dude you know. Shit, has she moved on? Before you know it, your day has been torpedoed by a fucking like, and she’ll be in your head every time you post something on social media. She’s in your head, and she’s not even paying rent.
Nathan McAlone at Business Insider dove deep into the burgeoning trend, even talking to an admitted “haunter” who owned up to the fact that he was partaking in the act to keep open the possibility of a future rendezvous. So basically tossing your ex a “Hey, I’m still here in case you were wondering.” I guess that’s always a possible motive for some, but I’m going to err on the side of people are just assholes and don’t care about other people’s feelings.
Modern dating is hell thanks to social media, so my advice would be to steer clear if you don’t have thick skin. Or just block them. .
[via Business Insider]
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