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Another weekend, another hurricane. It’s really hard to bitch about life when there is a major storm affecting millions and millions of people. As with Hurricane Harvey, I urge you to text REDCROSS to 90999 to donate to the relief efforts.
And now back to our regularly scheduled whining. I spent the weekend in New York, shopping and eating, so I don’t have much to complain about, aside from the fact that a fire at Marshall’s prevented me from getting a cute pair of workout pants on clearance. I mean, it was probably worse for the people that had deal with the fire, but still….they were on clearance. But even though I missed out on a bargain, I will had a better weekend than some people.
Reese Witherspoon
I think we can all agree that clowns are scary, right? I mean, that’s pretty much a commonly held belief as far as I’m concerned. And even America’s sweetheart is not immune to their savagery.
This weekend, Witherspoon dared to go up against a clown of Stephen King’s making when her new film, Home Again debuted on the same date as the new iteration of King’s It. Reese discovered it’s best not to fuck with clowns – even cinematic ones – when her movie’s sales were simply crushed by those of It, with the former taking in $9 million versus $117.2 million for the latter. Sure, that paltry amount was enough for second place at the box office, but still…just don’t mess with clowns, okay, Reese?
[via People]
Sydney Stempfley
Who is Sydney Stempfley, you ask? Well, she’s the girl that Arie Luyendyk Jr. dumped to become the new Bachelor.
Prior to the announcement of the pick, Stempfley threw some shade at Luyendyk, tweeting:
The show would be perfect for @ariejr up until it comes to choosing just one 😂
— Sydney Stempfley (@sydneystempfley) September 4, 2017
Although Stempfley isn’t part of Bachelor nation, Luyendyk has dipped his toe (or something else) in the seemingly endless incestual Bachelor dating pool since losing on Emily Maynard’s season of The Bachelorette; he’s dated season 16 contestant Courtney Robertson off and on since 2012. Perhaps that’s part of the reason for Stempfley’s shade. But did you really date a guy known as “The Kissing Bandit” and expect fidelity? Silly Sydney. [Via New York Post]
Tom Donkin
I have a pretty decent sense of direction, but even I get lost sometimes. Fortunately for me, it usually doesn’t happen when I’m at work and/or when there are cameras filming me.
The BBC’s Tom Donkin was scheduled to deliver some updates on Hurricane Irma when he seemed to get a little bit lost on his own set.
Well, at least he’s not like those CNN guys and outside in a hurricane.
[Via Mashable]
Wes Scantlin
Actually the people that probably had a worse weekend were Puddle of Mudd fans in Keller, Texas (whoever they are) when the band had to cancel a show due to Scantlin’s arrest at LAX on Saturday.
The lead singer tried to board a plane with a BB gun and was subsequently arrested, and given that you can’t really perform without a singer, the band had to cancel their show at Bronson Rock. This isn’t Scantlin’s first issue at the airport: in 2012, he had an altercation with a Jet Blue attendant and in 2015, he was arrested for riding on a baggage carousel at a Denver airport.
Perhaps it’s time to just start taking the bus. [Via TMZ]
Andy Dalton
Fall Sundays mean generally mean there are lots of football stories I can cover here, but in the interest of not boring the weird-ass people that aren’t into football, I’ll try and keep it to one or two a week. Taking this week’s football spot is Bengals’ quarterback Andy Dalton, whose team was shut out at home by the Ravens 20-0.
Dalton was mainly responsible for the loss, with four interceptions (three of which came in the first half) and a fumble in the red zone in the third quarter. I’m not sure if this makes it better or worse, but such a disastrous outing is rare for Dalton, who hasn’t thrown a three-pick game since November 2014. It seems even the NFL wants to believe this is a one-off for the QB:
Andy Dalton has 4 giveaways in a game for the first time since Week 17, 2013. That game was also against the Ravens (CIN won 34-17)
— NFL Research (@NFLResearch) September 10, 2017
Dalton was also sacked five times by the Ravens defense, which would signal that his throwing isn’t the only weak spot for the Bengals..
Better luck next week, ginger prince. [Via Sporting News]
Image via Denis Makarenko / Shutterstock.com
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Jenna Crowley
Jenna used to be known as 2NOTBrokeGirls, but then one of the girls actually went broke, so she's struck out on her own. Jenna spends her free time saving the world, one sorority girl at a time (usually while wearing yoga pants), questioning why she decided to get a doctorate, documenting her love of all things cheese related, and hosting the new PGP podcast Don't Take It From Us. You can ask her anything you want about football, using your boobs to get what you want, and pizza at @JennaLCrowley on Twitter or via email at JennaLCrowley@gmail.com.
@JennaLCrowley
@donttakeitfromus
I guess Marshalls was having a fire sale
Ohhh my god we’re having a fire! ….Sale!
“Fire fire there’s a fire”- Dean Pelton voice
This may be an unpopular opinion and it may be down-voted into oblivion but don’t donate to the Red Cross. There are other more influential local charities in both affected area that are doing better and more hasty work than the Red Cross and they badly need donations. Lists of reputable local charities are not difficult to come by with a simple google search. I recall when Haiti had the earthquake hearing family telling me how little the Red Cross did with the people on the ground with all the money they collected and how it was church groups and local charities not NGOs that were doing the most work. I struggle to tell someone what to do with their money and I know people will want to go with who is well known but please consider donating to local charities instead. Your donation with go much further.
They still have a majority of that half billion dollars raised for Haiti. Just sitting around collecting dust.
Red Cross sucks
Major shouts to all the touchers in Florida. Stay safe
My FF matchup this week started both Andy Dalton and New England’s defense. Textbook Sunday evening kys.
IT was good. Not a big scary movie guy and it certainly was a bit scary, but really good for a horror movie.
Why is a 45 year old man carrying around a BB gun like he’s Ralphie from a Christmas Story. That’s the question we should be asking. At least get arrested with a .45acp or something Jesus Christ
The Redskins going deep almost every passing play in the first quarter is still confusing.
Go big or go home.
Sup Sydney?
Downvoted you because, you know, 69
See that Sydney? 69.