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I’m on vacation on the West Coast this week, and I have to say – I think I enjoy football starting at 10:00 a.m. What I don’t enjoy: jet lag and the fact that it’s currently pouring rain. As such, I’m currently in my room watching Pitch Perfect 3 while eating a bag of Goldfish that got crushed in my suitcase. But on the upside, I’m not at work, so I’m having a better day than the weekend some of these people had.
Elon Musk
Sometimes tweets can come back to bite you in the ass, and if you’re Elon Musk, they may even cost you $20 million bucks.
Last week, the Securities and Exchange Commission brought suit against Musk last week. According to CNN:
The announcement from the SEC comes two days after the agency filed a lawsuit against Musk, claiming he misled investors. The suit centers on tweets Musk sent on August 7 in which he said he had secured funding to take Tesla private at $420 a share, causing the company’s stock to soar. He had not secured the funding, the SEC said.
The aforementioned settlement is the one reached Saturday, which Musk agreed to step down as chairman of Tesla and pay a $20 million fine in relation to the suite; he will be allowed to stay as CEO. Tesla will also separately pay another $20 million.
Musk’s troubles may not be over yet – the DOJ is still deciding if they will be criminal charges against Musk for misleading shareholders. Good luck with that, pal. [via CNN]
This Kid
You know how you can kind of tell if a kid is going to grow up to be an asshole based on his parents? Well, if that’s actually true, this kid is fucked.
An unnamed mother in the St. Louis area filed a federal lawsuit on Wednesday after her high schooler, referred to as John Doe in the suit, didn’t make the varsity soccer team, saying that the coach’s decision to not put him on the team violates his civil rights.
According to the email soccer coach Dave Aronberg sent to the family, “[John] was right on the bubble of making the team this year and has some impressive attributes. However, there were a few holes in his game including technical ability and game decision making that put him behind a number of kids.”
That wasn’t good enough for dear old Mom, whose son is a junior at Ladue Horton Watkins High School – and now probably the most ridiculed kid in the class. She wants her dear child put back on the J.V. team, despite a school policy that states players who don’t make varsity cannot go back to J.V., in order to allow younger students a chance to develop their skills.
So glad that, in this time of turmoil in our country, our courts are spending their time dealing with such important issues. [via New York Post]
Tyler Eifert
As that I’m on vacation, I didn’t spend my usual full Sunday watching football. As such, I was lucky enough to miss this hit on Bengals tight end Tyler Eifert, which caused his ankle to go a way that it definitely wasn’t supposed to:
Tyler Eifert ankle injury. Poor guy has the worst luck with injuries.
(weak stomachs look away)#CINvsATL pic.twitter.com/DhsvA4xv4u
— Donny Moore (@Donny_Moore) September 30, 2018
Eifert was attempting to run the ball downfield when he was taken down by Atlanta linebacker De’Vondre Campbell, who fell on Tyler’s right ankle and snapped it.
The injury is likely the end of yet another season for Eifert, who has never played a full 16-game season due to other injuries. [via TMZ]
Kanye West
No, I’m not talking about the fact that ‘Ye was booed after giving a pro-Trump speech at the end of Saturday’s SNL season opener. I’m talking about the fact that he gave performance dressed as a bottle of Perrier.
I honestly thought that I was having a jetlag-induced fever dream when I woke up to see West rapping dressed as a bottle of fancy water with Lil Pump dressed as a bottle of FIJI water.
Can someone please explain this to me?!
😂 @kanyewest @lilpump #ILoveIt in #SNL so 🔥 pic.twitter.com/Nusx5uI1C3
— SOHH (@sohh) September 30, 2018
[via US Magazine]
The U.S. Ryder Cup Team
Heading into this week’s Ryder Cup, golf fans were flying high after Tiger’s win last weekend. But that optimism was crushed when Europe beat the crap of the U.S. team, with a 17.5-10.5 victory outside of Paris this weekend.
Leading the charge of failure were Tiger Woods, who went 0-4, and Phil Mickelson, who went 0-2. Not far behind on the trash train was number one ranked Dustin Johnson, who only managed one point in five matches.
Well, at least Dustin and Paulina are back together, right?.
[via ESPN]
Respond
Jenna Crowley
Jenna used to be known as 2NOTBrokeGirls, but then one of the girls actually went broke, so she's struck out on her own. Jenna spends her free time saving the world, one sorority girl at a time (usually while wearing yoga pants), questioning why she decided to get a doctorate, documenting her love of all things cheese related, and hosting the new PGP podcast Don't Take It From Us. You can ask her anything you want about football, using your boobs to get what you want, and pizza at @JennaLCrowley on Twitter or via email at JennaLCrowley@gmail.com.
@JennaLCrowley
@donttakeitfromus
I hope everyone who gets assigned the federal lawsuit from the mother who probably gave her son participation trophies his whole life, laughs in her face and it doesn’t even reach a courtroom. Come on, parents. Do better.
I’m a high school athletic director. We actually had a mom threaten to sue on of our coaches for causing emotional stress related to playing time a few weeks ago. We knew she wouldn’t actually do it, but you’d be surprised how many insane parents are out there.
My dad used to be the defensive coordinator for my HS football team and he/the school district had two court settlements over his 20-some year coaching career because he was “too rough” on the players (he made them run laps if they didn’t listen or were disrespectful, basically, and thankfully the school district paid for all the fees and settlement costs associated with it). Parents need to get their noses out of issues unless a kid is actually harmed.
James Franklin and all the Penn State fans. What the hell was he thinking with that play call?
We don’t want to talk about it
Did you see him exchange words with a fan after the game? Not a good look
I’m a Ladue Horton Watkins Alum. This mother is 1 in a million. We’re not all like that.
Eifert marks the second TE I’ve lost in 4 weeks.
I’m a sick freak I love a quick drink – Kanye and Lil Pump
West 2024
the browns had a bad weekend too