Looking back on it now, it’s tough to remember where it all really went bad for me. I figured my girlfriend and I would have a few cocktails at her friend’s apartment and be on our way, asleep in bed by 1:00 a.m. at the latest. It was Labor Day weekend after all, and burning ourselves out on a Friday night seemed like a foolish thing to do. Better to pace ourselves for an inevitable bender that would last into the wee hours of Monday morning. But that’s not how it went.
Slowly but surely, 11:00 p.m. turned into 2:00 a.m., and drinks were being poured with reckless abandon. Red wine, vodka, beer, and I think there was even a shot of whiskey thrown in there at some point for good measure.
“If you see something, say something.”
You heard it in elementary school. You hear it and see it plastered on signs in subways and airport terminals across the country. But sometimes you need to know when to keep your mouth shut. There are occasions when you need to purse your lips and say “Ya know what? I’m just going to let this one slide off of the back of my shoulders because it simply isn’t worth it.”
I found myself in a situation where I thought I had seen something last Friday night. Where my gut and my brain were telling me two different things and no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t shake the sneaking suspicion that something was off.
You know what I did? I went with my gut because I was drunk and I ended getting in a heated argument with my girlfriend. What the argument was about is of no real importance because what I thought I saw was nothing. But in the moment my booze-addled mind was whispering to me.
“This is the hill you should die on tonight. Go ahead, you fucking moron. See what happens when you bring this up to your girlfriend in front of her friends.”
There are two sides to every argument unless, of course, you’re in a fight with a girl you’re dating. You know why comedians recycle that joke about your girlfriend or wife always being right? It’s because it’s relatable and, more importantly, it’s true.
Most, if not all of the time, at least in my relationship, she is in the right. Girls are smarter than boys. And she is one thousand percent smarter than I am.
If you want to get in a fight with your girlfriend you better make it be about something that you’re really, truly passionate about because otherwise you’re just digging yourself a hole and it’s going to be really difficult to get out of it.
I got tossed in the doghouse last weekend for that little spat on Friday but, holy shit, did I deserve it. I was just being an idiot. A jackass of the highest order.
I think arguing on an occasional basis is healthy for any romantic relationship. There are times when you need to put your foot down and say something along the lines of, “Sorry, but no. I don’t agree with you at all.”
Keeping lines of communication open is important. But you have to pick your battles because eventually she’ll just get fed up with your bullshit. Having a girlfriend is difficult sometimes but it’s worth it. 99% of the time, it’s a blast. Just don’t make it any harder on yourself by mimicking what I did last weekend. .
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