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But your favorite bar is packed.
So you head to another.
Then, a girl tells you that you look like Ryan Gosling.
Only that leads you to have an unexpected swing of confidence. And you begin drinking more and more.
And, hey, you seem to be hitting it off. The girl asks you what you’re up to this weekend. And you’re all like…
And then…
So your friends tell you to slow down your drinking, because you’re coming on too strong.
But you don’t. Instead, you point out how fat the girl’s friend is.
And this disgusts her. So she slaps you and walks off. To which your friends ask why you’re such an asshole.
No matter to you. Time to find another.
Because right now, you’re on fire.
Only your friends think you’ve had enough and it’s time to go back home. They must be joking, right? 
But they protest. And you’re all like…
And they say “No, we’re serious.”
And then they forcibly pull you out of the bar. So you protest, yourself.
And try to prove you’re not even that drunk.
Respond
Andrew Adams
Andrew is a native Texan and, while not complaining about something and talking too much, works as the Creative Director of Atomic Productions. While neither terribly great shape nor particularly handsome, he is known for being surprisingly charismatic and having a very respectable wardrobe.
@atomadams
Used to work with a guy that watched a Nicolas Cage movie every day until he’d seen every single one. Can’t say it wasn’t a great use of his time.
I didn’t see any mention of Dr. Stanley Goodspeed
Second page, caption “And they say “No, we’re serious.”” is Stanley Goodspeed. One of the more-famous shots from The Rock, too, I would say.
Best character name ever.
That was Goodspeed talking on that football sized 1996 era cell phone wasn’t it?