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Temperatures are finally beginning to rise and grass is growing where there was once snow. The collective mood begins to shift from pessimistic to cheery and care-free. There is no doubt that warm weather brings with it a sense of renewal, but for me, these 60 and 70-degree days can also spell disaster.
I love that it’s finally nice enough outside to wear shorts and a fresh pair of Birkenstocks, but it’s going to take a lot of willpower to not completely self-destruct in the next few months.
I have a lot of bad habits but during the winter they’re far easier to ignore than they are during the spring and summer when it feels like I have the world by the balls. I absolutely do not have the world by the balls, the high temperatures just give me a false sense of confidence. Presented to you now, in no particular order, are the vices which will be rearing their ugly head now that I don’t need a parka to walk a block down the street.
Smoking
I don’t know why but when I’m on a patio, lounging on a back porch, or just taking a walk around the neighborhood, I love having a cigarette. Cigarettes (as you know) are extremely addictive, but I don’t crave them when it’s freezing cold outside (probably because smoking indoors is now a big no-no and going outside in sub-zero temps to get a nicotine fix just isn’t worth it to me). Summertime and smoking cigarettes just go hand in hand, and no amount of negative side effects will stop me from buying a fresh pack of American Spirits on a warm summer’s day.
Drinking
Okay, so this one isn’t really exclusive to warm weather. I drink alcohol in all of the seasons, but alcoholic drinks just taste better when you’re consuming them outside and basking in the sunlight. My alcohol intake soars during the summer.
I live in a city that loves drinking, and anything positive that I had to say when it was cold outside about staying in and saving money should now be disregarded. In the summer after a grueling day in the cube, happy hours beckon with open arms. Now that it’s warm out, any day of the week is a good day to get absolutely shithoused.
Not Trying At Work
I’ve been sitting on this take for awhile, but I am convinced that during the summer people in Chicago just quit their jobs. I constantly see snaps and Instagram posts from seemingly-employed people on idle Tuesday or Wednesday afternoons going to Cubs games and drinking on patios all over the city. These posts certainly don’t help my productivity, and I’m positive there are going to be a few days in the next few months where I’ll sit at my desk ignoring any and all work-related obligations and simply stare at a clock, counting down the hours until I can go meet my friends for yet another happy hour.
Skipping The Gym
For someone as vain as myself, skipping the gym is not a good idea. However, when it’s 75 degrees outside and I get a text from a friend telling me about a rooftop with drink specials on Wednesdays starting at 4:30, the choice between working out or drinking is an easy one to make. This is a vicious cycle too because I’ll tell myself that I’ll go to the gym in the morning before work. My hangover will say otherwise, and then it’s rinse and repeat. Get invited to happy hour, shirk the gym, etcetera and so on.
I wish it wasn’t like this. I wish that I could be productive, functioning member of society when it gets nice outside but that’s not how this works. I pick up cigarettes again and drink more than I should and that’s just the way it is..
Respond
jduda@grandex.co
You missed the two most obvious bad habits you take part in:
1. Terrible Outfits
2. Chainsmokers
Duda is a fashion icon
Been cigarette free since May 2012, but with that said if the world was ending tomorrow my first purchase would be a pack of jacks
Same. June 2013. Waiting patiently for a non lethal, compostable cigarette to hit the market.
I know I might sound like a tool for saying this but if that’s your rationale, the Juul exists.
Patio beers, beach margs and baseball at the Juicebox. That sums up my next 4 months. Summer is GOAT.
Buddies have a house where we do roof beers. Its all fun and games until you can’t get down and your drunk on a roof.
All I’m trying to do is get through today and a half day tomorrow. Plan on getting “this is not good” drunk then going to dollar dog night at the Juicebox. God bless Summer
I will be partaking in dollar dog night tomorrow.
I’ll be in section 133, Blue and Gold Biggio jersey, and my wife will probably be telling me how disappointed she is in me while I shove another hotdog in my mouth
We’re in 235 so I’ll see if I can reach over and toss a beer down.
Dying for my first patio beer of the season.
Is it just me or is this Monday taking forever?
Yes
Cannot wait to skip out of work at noon during the summer to head to Wrigley.
Dude, trade the cigs for cigars. Slightly better for you. Also pretentious enough to fit your lifestyle.
Nah Duda is much more of a pretentious pipe guy. Fits his aesthetic.
You know what. You’re right.
There’s a time and place for both
Not a bad take, John Boy
None of these were “takes” broseph
Had some beers outside for the first time in what felt like forever this past Saturday. The late Spring/Summer/Early Fall time period is without a doubt the best time of the year
Someone needs to bring back Fail Friday and make the #1 fail all of 19th hole’s comments. That guy suuuuuucccccccxxxxxx
Relax there guy.
My favorite part about summer is the hope that maybe I’ll get three months where Duda doesn’t start every article by complaining about/referencing the cold