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So Taylor Swift did something last week. I haven’t really looked at what or why, but because I have a Twitter account, I know she did something. Using context clues, I gather it must have had something to do with Katy Perry. The only thing I know about Katy Perry is that she did some song about fireworks, she married and divorced that toothy British guy from Get Him to the Greek and she has a great personalititties.
This isn’t a new phenomenon. I remember back when I started college, “Jersey Shore” was a thing. It was all the rage; people all over campus were stained orange. Everyone’s hair was either Morticia Addams black or radioactive blonde. Every bro had cut sleeves, regardless if they were sporting pythons or garter snakes. “Guido” became a thing.
As a native son of New Jersey, this blew, as everyone assumed I was straight out of Seaside Heights whereas my blonde hair, blue eyed self has not a drop of Italian ancestry. People I knew gathered in droves to watch these idiots disregard any semblance of civility to interact with the world around them. For what it’s worth, a guy I played hockey with was a cop and his friend from the academy was a Seaside cop. Venereal disease medicine, everywhere.
I’m totally aware it is entirely scripted. The problem is, not everyone does. It’s like that guy that thinks wrestling is real and if you question, you’re a hater. No, asshole, I live in the real world. What Justin Bieber does on a day-to-day basis has zero effect on my life at all. I don’t really give a fuck about the Kardashians. In an ideal world, everyone in that family, including Kanye and his ugly shoes, would be jettisoned into the sun. Thanks a lot, OJ.
So why is this a thing? For our generation, reality television popularized this phenomenon. People sit on the edge of their seats, waiting for the next breaking TMZ spoon-fed bullshit to be delivered to them. What these people we will never meet should have absolutely no bearing on our lives. The only logical conclusion I can think of is that one’s life is so devoid of substance and meaning that living vicariously through an unattainable lifestyle they see on TV as their only joy in life because it distracts them from their own mundane existence.
“Chris Pratt and Anna Farris are getting divorced. OMG there is nothing sacred!” Holy shit, two insanely wealthy and famous people got divorced, that literally never happens. I feel so sorry for them, with all of their wealth and influence. Hopefully they land on their feet. I can’t tell you how many times someone has asked, “Have you heard (whatever washed up irrelevant celebrity trying to maintain relevance) did (slept with, did drugs, got arrested, divorced)?” “No but now I did, thanks for keeping me in the loop.” As my friend Mick always said, “WGAS, Who Gives a Shit.”
The biggest problem with all of this is that we are becoming Idiocracy. The logic, “Because they are famous, they must be smart/talented/knowledgeable/etc.” is absolutely insane. Kid fucking Rock is running for office. The best thing he ever did was play Robbie in Joe Dirt. People take celebrities’ words like they are some sort of gospel. Look, not everything can be solved with a Pepsi.
Maybe you’re thinking, “So what, Madoff?” Well, it’s our own fault. We put people on a pedestal. We glorify their opinions, inflate egos and wonder why these people have Greek tragedy levels of burnouts. They are flawed humans that were at the right place at the right time. If Snooki wasn’t given a show for being literal human trash, she’d be a waitress or gas station attendant. The only reason anyone is considered talented is because society deems things like catching a ball a certain way to be noteworthy and it’s been this way for centuries. Look at gladiators, duelists, jousters, it’s all entertainment to distract ourselves from the mundane reality of life. Now if you’ll excuse me, we’ve got Ja Rule on the phone..
Image via Tinseltown / Shutterstock.com
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Madoff
I specialize in damage control, being the drunkest at any and all functions and social assassination. Always appreciate a strong gif game. Follow me on Twitter. Sometimes I put up cool stuff about golfing at the local dirt tracks.
@BLMInvestment
The line between pop culture and real life has been blurring but it disappeared for good the moment we elected a freakin reality show host as president.
“Kanye and his ugly shoes”?? Better hope “the sock” (Will) doesn’t see this
Between that line and the Kid Rock slander, I officially know where I stand with Madoff. Been fun.
Best part about Kid Rock died with Joe C
Yeah, we wouldn’t want to talk about the time he visited the troops in Iraq on Christmas, donated hundreds of thousands of dollars to various charities, or surprised a mentally challenged fan on his birthday before taking him to a Pistons game.
Approximately how many times would you say you’ve watched his sex tape (featuring Creed front man, Scott Stapp)?
100% agree…but wrestling is real
I’m with ya Madoff, good article…but leave Kid Rock out of it.
I gave up a long time ago. Last time I cared about pop culture was probably college
I just found out who DJ Khaled was a month ago…Im so out on pop culture
Why would I fangirl over celebrities when I can fangirl over Madoff??
Another great read.
I too am dismayed by the elevation and importance of pop culture and the “stars” to such levels of infatuation. Such a distraction from just choosing to live a decent, positive life. But, I’m confused why this commentary appears on this site, as it seems contrary to a majority of the other content. Including ongoing reviews of reality shows.
I chose to tune out years ago. There is good stuff out there, from movies to books to music. I don’t know if people are too lazy to try or too deluded and scared to leave the pack. Out of all the things you learned, and have forgotten, from college, it seems like people would have gained the ability for independent, critical thinking.
WWE is fake, wrestling is real. And Penn State is the realest of the real.
I’m wearing yeezys right now and they’re great.
Live look at you buying your shoes
Dude hating on yeezys is so played out. I bet you love making Harmbe jokes too.
Check my twitter line. Never once mentioned Harambe. You’d know that I don’t mess with that kind of shit if you read the article.