======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ==== ======= ======= ====== ====== ====== ===== ==== ====== ====== ===== ====
Wedding trends are easy to make fun of. Yes, every girl between 2011 and 2014 wanted mason jars at their wedding. Of course, there’s going to be one wedding you go to where the bride is wearing a flower crown a few years too late. And no, the cheesy candid-but-not photos are probably never going to go away.
But one trend that needs to go away? It’s called “Marryoke” which is the love child of the two words “marry” and “karaoke” and it’s a nightmare.
For whatever reason, there’s a group of people in our demographic who think filming an over-produced music video on their wedding day is somehow a good idea. ABC News is doing the devil’s work by trying to promote this as the “perfect” idea for “brides who like to boogie.” Seriously, that’s a headline that someone at ABC-fucking-News was like, “Yeah, let’s run with it.”
Move over sentimental “I do’s” caught on camera — there’s a new wedding video trend in town.
Brides and grooms who love to boogie seriously need to know about “Marryokes,” the karaoke wedding video that captures you and your guests jamming out to an epic song of choice throughout the big day’s celebrations.
Hey, you know where else you can boogie besides in a stupid fucking video that takes over what’s supposed to be the happiest day of your life? The dance floor where you have a band that’s playing enjoyable songs for all of your family and friends to dance to. But who am I to tell you that choreographing a fucking overwrought music video instead of soaking in all the love of your attendees is a bad idea? I’m just some guy who’s never gotten married and has no taste, right?
Here, do me a solid and watch a few of these, and then we’ll reconvene and discuss whether or not they were a good idea.
You know what actually is great about these videos, though? You can see the punchability of each couple without even watching the videos themselves. It’s kind of like being in a college town and seeing a poster on a light post for an acapella show and just knowing that every attendee is going to fucking suck.
“Hey honey,” they probably say, “You know what would put our wedding day over the top? If we hired a camera crew and forced all of our guests to pretend that they’re having fun taping a shitty music video that will get 10,000 YouTube views and embarrass our children.”
I’m not trying to tell you how to live your life or spend your wedding day (okay, well, maybe I am), but do yourself a favor and don’t center it around trying to become a viral sensation. It’s an embarrassment.
Oh, and I still hate your engagement photos, too..
[via ABC News]
Image via YouTube
Respond
Will
Will (Twitter / Instagram) is the host of The Sunday Scaries Podcast.
@willdefries
@willdefries
defriewf
will@grandex.co
She won’t let me perform Juicy. PGP.
The only good part of these videos is when you can visibly see the pain in the eyes of one of the forced participants (groomsman on the left, second video) as they halfheartedly bop around like dying fish.
“If I don’t get some strange for this, someone will have to die tonight.”
And this is why I’m pro-elopement.
Liberals….
You will regret having me in any choreography after my fifth Jack & Coke.. not sorry.
Before doing this every couple should be required to ask their parents how many times they’ve watched their wedding video. The answer will invariably be somewhere between zero and two, which will remind the parents they have a mere two days before the last VCR ever is made if they plan on converting that dusty old VHS to anything that can be watched after August 1.
Anyone notices how nice these venues are? Damn! No wonder they don’t care how douchey they look in the videos