25 Things I Find To Be Nauseating


  1. When girls say, “I miss your face!” *cue me punching myself in the vagina*
  2. When someone’s info on their Instagram says something like, “Lover of all things furry and pink. Cappuccino enthusiast.” *vomit ensues*
  3. The words “yummy,” “meal” and “stinky.” That took seriously more strength to even type that word than you will ever know.
  4. When someone is wearing Tory Burch head-to-toe. Haha. Okay, bitch. We GET IT.
  5. People who have dogs that shouldn’t.
  6. Homeless people who have dogs…
  7. Bad eyebrows. Too thin eyebrows. Even though my lighter-colored brows turn their back on me when the flash is on in pictures sometimes and decide not to show up… THEY’RE THERE.
  8. Literally just passing by a Carl’s Jr.
  9. When a girl freaks out when someone says the word “moist” trying to be cute (I will never understand this one).
  10. Everyone at the gym.
  11. When girls wear frosty eyeshadow all the way up to their eyebrows.
  12. People who only drink beer at the bar.
  13. When a girl posts a picture of a celebrity she thinks she looks like on “Woman Crush Wednesday” just so people will say she looks like her.
  14. People who think they are superior because they read books instead of watch reality TV.
  15. Tennis shoes with jeans EVER (this is kind of self-explanatory).
  16. People that don’t find things I find funny to be funny at all.
  17. Guys who think they’re better than everyone and force you to re-introduce yourself every time you are around them even though you KNOW they know exactly who you are.
  18. When girls hate the baddest bitches on reality shows like Brandi and Stassi (they are clearly superior).
  19. EVERYTHING from Victoria’s Secret PINK line.
  20. When I offer a homeless person something and they turn me down (a guy once asked me for any change I had then scoffed at me as he threw the nickels and pennies into a flowerbed beside me).
  21. When a friend that is really skinny keeps saying, “I’m so fat” while constantly looking her own body up and down in the mirror like “Yeah, I’d tap that.”
  22. Fedoras. Fedoras. Fedoras. Fedoras. Most fedoras.
  23. People who are “too tired” to go out after happy hour….. Bitch I’m just getting started!!!
  24. “They’re” vs. “their”… Do I seriously need to explain further/does everyone NOT agree.
  25. When someone takes up two parking spots because they are a freaking idiot/drive too big of a truck. ALWAYS write a note starting with the words “You make me SICK.”

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