I don’t mind the real world. I actually enjoy the different lifestyle. I’m not McConaughey in “Dazed And Confused” and I’m not stuck in the past. I’m just saying I have observed the differences in the two lifestyles in my short time living in the post grad world.
1. Top Dog To Runt Of The Litter
College: You can hear someone yelling your name across the quad or people asking where you were in class. Something’s always happening and you’re always involved.
Real World: Literally (I mean literally) very few people are aware you exist. You could die and people would only realize you went missing because some minor work tasks were not getting done for the past couple months.
2. Days Off
College: Class? Forget about it. Two inches of rain and lightning coming in? Homework isn’t due until next week. National this-guy-died-a-long-time-ago-so-let’s-honor-his-memory day? Don’t even bother setting your alarm because you deserve to roll out of bed at 2 p.m.
Real World: An atomic bomb won’t stop us from keeping our doors open for business. See you at your cube at 8 a.m.!
College: The only things you get in the mail are care packages from Mom, coupons from the pizza store down the street, and the occasional item you buy online.
Real World: You get to look forward to rent (mortgage if you’re crushing it at the office), electric, water, and gas bills. You also have your credit card bill, car insurance bill, and your neighbor’s bills that you have to walk over and return to him. Oh, did I mention bills?
College: Getting that internship at ____ & Associates just made you look like a complete badass. You look sharp every day you head into the office so when you come back to campus, everyone knows you’re crushing it. You want everyone to believe you will most likely run for POTUS in the future.
Real World: Looking forward to Jeans Day is one of the few highlights of the week.
College: Having pizza at least twice a week is completely normal, yet you don’t gain a single pound.
Real World: You’re 90 percent sure that your morning cup of coffee added three pounds.
College: Fatigue from last night’s all-nighter can be brushed away with a 15-minute nap and maybe some fluids.
Real World: You stayed up until 10:30 the other night and you’re still feeling that decision’s terrible effects.