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21 More Power Moves You Can Pull At Your Entry Level Job

This is a recurring PGP series. Catch up with all installments of Power Moves by visiting the archive.

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  1. Say, “Let me crunch some numbers and get back to you!” when a coworker asks you to help with a menial task.
  2. End each email you send with a different Hunter S. Thompson quote.
  3. Reply to company wide emails with “I think I speak for everyone when I say…”
  4. Take dry swings in the break room.
  5. Tell people you’re thinking about playing in a US Open qualifier.
  6. Keep an extra large container of protein powder under your desk.
  7. Reference “How to Win at the Sport of Business: If I Can Do It, You Can Do It” by Mark Cuban while eating lunch with your boss.
  8. Openly brag about how much money you saved on your utility bill last month.
  9. Refer to your gym as a “health club.”
  10. Cook a $2.50 steak at home and bring it in for lunch the next day. Claim it is from Morton’s.
  11. Triple Dipper at Chili’s. All day, every day.
  12. Say, “They have a great salad there,” when an overweight coworker tells you where they’re going for lunch.
  13. Make your own personal parking space sign for your parking space that’s 500 yards from the office.
  14. Lead off emails with a link to your LinkedIn profile.
  15. Invite your boss to go get a haircut with you at Sport Clips.
  16. Text pictures of yourself at happy hour to married coworkers.
  17. Put two empty shot glasses on your desk when staying late.
  18. Use an empty milk jug to drink water at your desk.
  19. Drink pre-workout instead of coffee.
  20. Bring a different date to every company function.
  21. Bring a group of interns into the conference room and hold a “team building” seminar.

Editor’s note: Some, if not all of these, will get you fired.

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Brian McGannon

What do I love? I love happy hour, a good golf tan, and getting moderately drunk during dinner.

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