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Every single day of the week has a feel to it. Mondays are similar to that of having something stuck in your teeth the entire day. Tuesdays are like falling asleep in a huge lecture class. Wednesdays are like a lunch break where you’re catching up on homework that you didn’t do the night before. Thursdays, meanwhile, feel like December 23rd – not quite Christmas Eve, but close enough that you don’t mind waiting anymore. Of course, Fridays are like the first time you were left at home alone without a babysitter while Saturdays are the first day of spring break in middle school.
Sundays, though. You can feel Sundays no matter how you decide to encounter you encounter them. If you’re hungover, there’s a weight that you can’t seem to shake until you finally fall into a melatonin-induced sleep around 11 p.m. when the weekend is finally over. If you were responsible enough to stay in the night before, you can tackle the day methodically and indulge without guilt. Coffee and pastries can lead into pizza and beer, all culminating with a quiet night at home with a movie or television show. But no matter how you go about it, Sundays are a time to be selfish and do whatever you have to do to feel good about yourself going into the long work week ahead.
So yes, it should go without saying that GQ’s insinuation that “Sunday is the best day for a first date.”
You can make a case to go on a first date pretty much any day of the week, but depicting Sunday night as the premiere date night is reckless and irresponsible. Let’s take some excerpts from Lauren Larson’s piece and dissect why you should never, under any circumstances, ask someone on a first date to end your weekend.
On Sundays you’re not competing with a million Friday night revelers for bar stools, and you’re not competing with all the cool Friday night parties your date could be at that night. Still, the best thing about Sunday is its distance from the horrors of the workweek.
The flaw in this argument is simply that Friday nights are close to Sunday nights in terms of where they should fall on the scale of Best Nights To Go On First Dates. Friday nights, for all intents and purposes, should not be reserved for uncomfortable and forced conversations. Friday nights are your first opportunity to unwind from a week of emails and meetings; they’re not meant to pigeonhole yourself with another party in a crowded bar full of young professionals looking to blow off some steam.
Furthermore, the notion that “the best thing about Sunday is its distance from the horrors of the workweek” is simply incorrect. Not only are you staring down the barrel of Monday’s gun, you’re imagining all the pieces you have to pick up the next morning from all the slacking you did on Friday.
I believe that our social skills peak on Sunday nights, only to return to a monosyllabic nadir on Monday morning … After a weekend of safe chats with people I know well, by Sunday evening I’ve refined all my new funny jokes, and I’m properly lubed up for chit-chat with a stranger.
I’m not going to pretend that the author and I should have all the same viewpoints. That’s simply not the case. But most people’s social skills are completely zapped come Sunday night. We’re social creatures who enjoy spending the majority of our free time in crowded bars – especially when single and testing the waters while dating. Bars are, for better or worse (more worse), the best place to meet someone easily which is why we flock to them weekend-in and weekend-out.
She does, however, admit that there are some fundamental flaws.
There are two potential downsides to the Sunday date. The first is that should your date go badly, you’ll wake up Monday morning bathed in misery and your game will be shook all week long. But your date won’t go badly, because you’ll both be your best Sunday selves. The other potential downside is the Sunday curfew. I have a strong lizard response against staying up late on Sundays, such that even if the date is the best ever, at 11 P.M. I will immediately terminate it and scuttle away to bed.
The last thing I want to do after a long weekend is 1.) spend valuable time with someone I’ve never met before, and 2.) spend even more valuable money on someone I’ve never met before. Yes, not every date requires you to spend money, but there are only so many things Sunday nights have to offer. You can throw hiking out the window when all your body is craving is a fat glass of cabernet and a bowl of pasta. And once that date appears to be going well, so do three more glasses of that cabernet which all lead to the dreaded Monday morning hangover. You know, that thing we all desperately try to avoid.
But here’s where we go off the rails.
One little-known benefit of the Sunday date is that it fully dissolves the Sunday scaries. The Sunday scaries, for those who are blissfully unaware, is the anxiety that sets in before you go back to work after the weekend (again, I love my job—but I actively dread getting up early to do it). Most people nurse their Sunday scaries by drinking anyway, so why not drink away your jitters with another person?
No no no no no, every day of the week and a million times on Sunday.
Yes, she drew her exact definition from a site that I created. No, this does not make her an expert. Curing your Sunday Scaries by drinking is quite possibly the worst way to cure them. It only amplifies said anxiety come Monday. To do all of that with a total stranger? No. No no no no no.
With any first date, there comes anxiety. There’s a hope and optimism that the date will go well that’s also paired with the dread that you could end up spending the next two hours with someone who you don’t hit it off with. Preparing for a first date is akin to preparing for a big presentation or a high school soccer game – you need to be prepared, you need to feel confident, and you need to get up for it. None of which are things normally associated with Sundays by any stretch of the imagination.
Have a family dinner. Engage in a quarter-life crisis. Eat a bowl of bucatini. Just don’t go on a first date with someone you met online.
She references a “Sunday kind of love,” which is a phrase not connected with a blossoming love at all. Sunday dates are the perfect way to unwind with a long-term partner, but something to avoid at all costs if you’re still swiping away in your Uber home from the bars at 2 a.m. .
[via GQ]
Respond
Will
Will (Twitter / Instagram) is the host of The Sunday Scaries Podcast.
@willdefries
@willdefries
defriewf
will@grandex.co
Best day of the week for a first date is Thursday, without question. Mix the pre-weekend feeling without suggesting that neither of you don’t have plans of your own for Friday night. Date goes well, you can parlay it into a Saturday night date.
Just said pretty much exactly this to Dillon which was met with a hard nod of approval.
I just got paid $6784 working off my laptop this month. And if you think that’s cool, my divorced friend has twin toddlers and made over $9k her first month. It feels so good making so much money when other people have to work for so much less. This is what I do… www.Jobzon3.com
Great reasoning, but Thursdays are my sacred Mexican food night, so I’ve taken to Wednesday night dates for those that I don’t care a lot about, and the slightly crazy but underrepresented Saturday afternoon date.
You can go for the late brunch, or show up after brunch and a little liquid courage. There are always activities and things to do that differentiate you from the drinks of every other first date, while still keeping it low-key. Plus there’s no I have to be at work tomorrow thoughts, and if it’s going well, you can “blow off” your Saturday night plans and keep the date going.
I just got paid $6784 working off my laptop this month. And if you think that’s cool, my divorced friend has twin toddlers and made over $9k her first month. It feels so good making so much money when other people have to work for so much less. This is what I do… Onlinecareer10.com
I would tend to agree. Thursday nights are the best first date night.
Solid take, but we’re all out here waiting on the Chronicles of Todd, Will. It’s currently just past noon, so he’s ring shopping with Caroline at this very moment and I need an update like I need to breathe.
Not happening today, folks. I apologize.
I downvoted myself.
“If you are not taking care of your customers, your competitors will” @defries
I just don’t see another site writing TGDAG if I stop.
Fortunately for PGP, there isn’t an “After College Articles” site…yet.
Jesus Will, go pour yourself a Avion and Tito’s, man a conference room and get this shit done.
I mean Chico not Tito’s that would be gross
Classic Freudian slip.
If a girl suggested a Sunday first date, i’d think I was her plan C at best.
Blah blah blah. I mean, you’re totally correct. But this isn’t the content we want from you today, Will.
I don’t care if we’ve been together for 3 years, I refuse to go on a Sunday night date. That time is reserved exclusively for me to lay around and feel sorry for myself.
My girlfriend and I do happy hour from 4-6 at a restaurant so we can go home after and still have four to five hours to be trash.
Sunday happy hours (especially at Mexican places) are very underrated. A few places near me in DFW offer $2 margs, $2 beer, free/$1 quest or guac, etc. Plus the fiancé feels like we are finally getting out of the house for the day, and I still get football on tv.
Sunday daydrinking / general Sunday Fundays have made for great first dates in my experience. Agree with you on Sunday night though
Sunday is the best day for a second date. As a fella who likes to and is good at cooking, inviting a lady over on Sunday evening for a little dinner and wine is a nice way to showcase you have your life semi-together and keep it casual.
Second date and you’re inviting someone into your home already? Bold strategy Cotton.
Went on back to back Sunday dates with a girl the previous two weeks. The first one actually went well, hence the second, however she claims she wants to live in Iowa so we shall no longer be going out on any dates.
this sunday i have my brother’s baby shower at noon, which includes a bloody mary/mimosa bar. im riding the wave into a 3PM Detroit Lions tailgate. Going to disrepect myself in the Eastern Market parking lot like a fucking savage. After that, PapaGiorgio’s going to be posted up in a suite to watch our beloved Lions take on the Steelers.
Took monday off
Strong disagree. Nothing better than early ~6 o’clock drinks. Worse case scenario the date goes poorly and your too busy worrying about your inadequacies as a lover to be concerned about work. Scaries gone.